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Oh ffs, if my dog were on AIBU this would be the scene right now.

(53 Posts)
SatansLittleHelper2 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:11:18

AIBU ??

I'd just finished taking a drink from the toilet bowl when I smelt something tasty in.the bathroom bin.

What could I do other than nose it out the door so it rolled down the stairs (( my preferred method of bin opening )) and there amongst the usual fluff was a blood soaked, tasty morsel.

IMO in thinking my human over reacted ?? Was there really any need to chase me round the house screeching and yelling at human number 2 (( number 2 because he doesnt keep treats in his pocket ))' the string, the.fucking string, the stupid idiot has a.fucking tampon string hanging out of its mouth, don't just sit there'

After snatching my snack away owner is now upstairs making an awful racket in the bathroom. AIBU in thinking this is emotional abuse and completely unreasonable ? I really don't see what all the fuss is about. 🐕

PreciousVagine Sun 05-Jun-16 11:14:04

This has put me off ever owning a dog grin

Princesspeach1980 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:16:56

Satandog I feel your pain, my human reacts the same when I steal her used pants from the washing pile and take them to my bed so I can lick the gusset clean. Love Peachhound grin

Andrewofgg Sun 05-Jun-16 11:19:05

You need to get those humans sorted out. Or rehomed grin - who do they think they are?

MrsJayy Sun 05-Jun-16 11:23:38

I think you need better humans tbh have you considered rehoming them you deserve to be happy.

SatansLittleHelper2 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:23:51

I know, i've.been put outside. I'm doing this face through the door 🐶

WIBU to roll in fox poo later ?? I usually try and stop.myself but if i'm going to be in trouble I may as well.do it properly.

Andrewofgg Sun 05-Jun-16 11:26:03

Do, then crap on the carpet. Do it for Dogsnet!

MrsJayy Sun 05-Jun-16 11:27:17

Do it. My human wont let me take lovely sweaty socks to my bed its not fair the struggle is real

FoxyLoxy123 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:29:00

sicks a bit. That's just too far. What did your mother teach you? You can lovingly carry a worn sock around but that's where it ends!

From a judgemental Golden Retriever (who lives with another dog that is also revolting, eats cat shit out of the flower bed and has then sicked it up in the back of DH (Dear Human)'s car on at least two occasions)

BusyNothings Sun 05-Jun-16 11:29:51

Me and my brother feel your pain. Our human won't let us under the quilt this morning. How rude.

SatansLittleHelper2 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:40:00

Hmm, I think I will go with shitting on the rug. I might roll in it too then get into the owners bed. That went down really well last time.

Knackered46 Sun 05-Jun-16 11:45:02

Yay! Do it! 😁

Dogsnet 1
Mumsfret 0

That'll larn em!

VioletBam Sun 05-Jun-16 11:49:56

Omg! YANBU! I feel your pain...earlier, I found a deliciously moist elastoplast ...the extra chewy fabric kind...which my smaller human had lost on the floor. It was such a lovely surprise....and obviously dropped for me....so when my bigger human said "EW! That bloody dog!" and snatched it from me, I was hurt and a little bit annoyed.

I am planning on chewing a cable later to teach them a lesson.

WeAllHaveWings Sun 05-Jun-16 11:51:44

Threads like this drive me mad, you are blaming the human not the dog.

Be honest how much time have you spent training your human? Dogs just go and live with them, don't meet their need to have a cute and effortless dog and are then surprised when the human reacts.

I have eaten most of the training books and now have my human trained in the basics. I don't need to steal treats, if I want a treat all I need to do is stand in front of the fridge, furrow my brow and tilt my head from side to side and they smile at me, ask me what I want, open the door, give me a treat.

The only problem is they keep asking me "who's a good boy?" and I have no fucking idea who they are talking about!!

pieceofpurplesky Sun 05-Jun-16 11:53:40

My human is angry with me because I emptied the evil cat's litter tray. She is always emptying it - I was just helping. I mean I know she puts in the the bin and I emptied it in the floor - but no difference really is there?
She's in a right arsey mood now.

Bubble2bubble Sun 05-Jun-16 11:56:47

YANBU. They are totally overreacting. Go and choose yourself a nice stick from the garden and take it to their bed for a chew.
And let them come and apologise to you. Its Sunday morning FFS.

VioletBam Sun 05-Jun-16 11:58:46

Wings now be fair to the OD (opening Dog) He doesn't mean to offend and I'm sure he loves his human a lot. We can't all be experts...some of us learn on the job.

littledrummergirl Sun 05-Jun-16 12:00:34

I think my human is being completely unreasonable to ban me from their bedrooms making me sleep in my own space.
I don't know why she didn't like it when I left my scent in the middle of the bed.
She made a huge row when she got in it and found it wet. Told me it's a good job my ddad was working that night. shock

ProudAS Sun 05-Jun-16 12:02:04

AIBU to think my owners are ungrateful. I decided to walk myself to save them having to do it. I'm now in the doghouse and they're patching up my hole in the fence.

rembrandtsrockchick Sun 05-Jun-16 12:02:11

It took me 20' to get mine out of bed this morning! Twenty bloody minutes of whining and scratching the side of the bed...I kid you not. Once we got out there in the fresh air she did realise that two thirty in the morning is a wonderful time of day and we had a good time...apart from the yawning and a bit of moaning.
I have occasionally thought about rehoming her and getting a young one but at my age (16) I don't feel up to training another one.

Peyia Sun 05-Jun-16 12:03:54

Just glide your ass on their shag pile, that will teach them.

honeybuffe Sun 05-Jun-16 12:12:05

I did what I thought was a kind act. Not only did I steal an avocado for me, I passed one down to my brother and also the newest addition, since he is too much of a wuss to help himself. Now I'm in trouble. Apparently since I did the same thing yesterday I will make myself sick with my gluttony. My owner should be thanking me, the foster, who apparently no one wants and seems like he will never leave now has a fabulous glossy coat due to me ensuring all 3 of us get our 86 a day. A thank you wouldn't go astray. (See what I did there, stray, get it?) 🐶🐈🐕

Zaphodsotherhead Sun 05-Jun-16 12:24:35

You're going to have to have them PTS. It's for their own good.

Signed: Two terriers who are watching their humans for signs of weakness/old age...

Sparklingbrook Sun 05-Jun-16 12:30:20

I love my cat. smile She gently strokes my face to wake me up and brings me slow worms.

I remember a tale on MN once of the dog eating the poo out of a potty before they got chance to sort it out. <vom>

PinkBallerina Sun 05-Jun-16 12:34:05

LTBs. Thats what i do when they annoy me.

Then a couple of hours later they are fawning all over me and giving me treats and the kids are crying with joy at my return whilst my parents lie to the owner of the local dog rescue about how they really did update my microchip information and there must be a clerical error

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