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AIBU re this odd request from neighbours?

(486 Posts)
yorkshapudding Sun 02-Aug-15 16:51:01

Our NDN's came over to tell us that they are having some work done in their back garden starting tomorrow- having a fence built, some trees cut down, rubbish cleared etc. They estimate it will be about two full days work, possibly more. They then told us that they were going away and would not be back until after the job has finished. They explained that they don't want to leave the workmen a key for "security reasons" so this means they will have no power source to plug tools in, no access to a bathroom or kettle etc. so would we be in and if so would we mind 'helping out' with those things.

I explained that DH will be at work and while I am actually off work for the next couple of days, I will have various errands, things to do, want to take DC out etc. so will be in and out of the house. They then asked when I was planning on going out so they could let their workmen know and saying "oh don't worry, they'll work around you". I told them that I hadn't made firm plans and didn't know when I would be going out. To be honest I don't really want to be tied to a schedule and I also don't like the idea of three strange men traipsing around my house for two days. I told them that I was sorry but they needed to either provide them with a key or arrange for the work to be done at a time when they would be home as we couldn't be on hand for two days to provide cups of tea, electricity and access to bathroom facilities etc.

Although they were polite, I got the distinct feeling that NDN's thought I was being mean and not very neighbourly.

AIBU or is it a bit much to expect me to accommodate all this? Initially I thought they were being cheeky (they don't want to leave these men a key but I should just open my house up to them!) and that it was a bit of a strange request but due to their reaction (they seemed quite surprised that I said no) I'm now doubting myself. They are generally quite annoying neighbours, nothing too awful just a bit noisy and inconsiderate at times, so I don't trust myself to be objective!

scatterthenuns Sun 02-Aug-15 16:52:23

YANBU! How odd of her.

sooperdooper Sun 02-Aug-15 16:53:08

Cheeky buggers! You were completely right to say no, for all the reasons you've already said!

ImperialBlether Sun 02-Aug-15 16:53:12

Well, I think you're incredibly selfish not using your holiday to help your neighbours!


Meow75 Sun 02-Aug-15 16:53:16

Wow, you seem to have a serious case of "My neighbours are entitled muppets syndrome".
Are you familiar with it?!?!

VitaminCrumpet Sun 02-Aug-15 16:54:14

YANBU! Cheeky feckers. It's not your problem they are going away. They sound very entitled.

Metacentric Sun 02-Aug-15 16:54:24

Say no. Their circus, their monkeys. Why should you have you loo roll, teabags and electricity used? Why should you help at all? They are trying it on.

IAmAShitHotLawyer Sun 02-Aug-15 16:55:37

YABU - we are supposed to help our neighbours.

The above was my initial thought.

However, I re-read your thread and I thought, who arranges for workmen to come to the house knowing they need access to electricity and then goes away for two days?

So I changed my mine and now think YANBU.

Hope that helps

MissDemelzaCarne Sun 02-Aug-15 16:55:37

Cheeky beggars! shock

Andylion Sun 02-Aug-15 16:55:39

Do not doubt yourself, YANBU. As you have said yourself, they don't want to deal with these workers but are annoyed that you won't? (Providing them cups of tea and access to your bathroom, FFS?)

CruCru Sun 02-Aug-15 16:55:44

Ha ha, so basically they want you to manage their workmen for them? They're having a laaarrrrf.

crustsaway Sun 02-Aug-15 16:55:49


Its their garden and their responsibility.

Im in the cheeky selfish neighbour camp.

expatinscotland Sun 02-Aug-15 16:57:41

Your neighbours are dickheads. I'd have told them no, too. Use your power for their work? For that reason alone they are pisstaking arseholes. YANBU.

If the workmen rock up tomorrow, tell them you told the NDN's NO. Don't be walked over.

VitaminCrumpet Sun 02-Aug-15 16:58:35

I have a solution. The NDN can give YOU a key and you can lock up every night grin

SideOrderofChips Sun 02-Aug-15 16:59:56

They want to use YOUR electric for THEIR workmen?!

And water, sewage etc...


yorkshapudding Sun 02-Aug-15 17:02:26

Thank you all. My first instinct was that they were taking the piss. I just wanted to make sure as I admit that, because I don't particularly like them, I have previously gotten my knickers in a twist about quite minor things that they've done. I guess on this ocassion my twisty knickers are justified grin

expatinscotland Sun 02-Aug-15 17:02:55

I wouldn't have told them I was off work, either. Grow a backbone with these people. Fast.

LIZS Sun 02-Aug-15 17:04:16

Yanbu. Even our notso d ndn left the guy who has done their patio while they are away access to electricity, running water etc. He did bring a flask though so presumably no kettle etc. Shame they didn't have the courtesy to let us know he might be coming and using our drive for access but all in all not nearly as much of an imposition as your ndns are expecting.

StillStayingClassySanDiego Sun 02-Aug-15 17:04:41

Yes tell them that you're unable to help on account of not being fucking walk overs with doormat written on your forehead .

Are they dim?

MammaTJ Sun 02-Aug-15 17:06:11

My first instinct was that they were taking the piss

Entirely correct!

Tizwailor Sun 02-Aug-15 17:06:14

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Collaborate Sun 02-Aug-15 17:06:22

If they ask again, just practice this:
"Oh I'm sorry, but I'm just not comfortable assuming a responsibility for other people's building works."

SilverBirchWithout Sun 02-Aug-15 17:07:51

Your response was spot on. What cheeky beggars your NDNs are.

It is perfectly reasonable to not want to plan your days around their builders needs.

IamtheDevilsAvocado Sun 02-Aug-15 17:08:37

Entitled muppet syndrome. Their circus their monkeysgringrin

It's nice being neighbourly- but they are not..and you dont like them....

So why should you help them out at considerable inconvenience to yourself?

No you're not bu!!

suitsyou Sun 02-Aug-15 17:12:07

YABU. I bet you won't help with the erection of the fence either will you?

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