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What would your father do if you were kidnapped by Parisian sex traffickers?

(437 Posts)
MitzyLeFrouf Fri 15-May-15 23:07:21

I'm watching Liam Neeson in Taken as he kicks, wallops and murders his way across Paris in pursuit of his abducted daughter? It's made me wonder what my father would do if such a situation arose.

He's an ex-accountant with a dodgy hip so I'm not sure he'd follow the Neeson method of daughter retrieval. He'd be more likely to start the rescue by putting the kettle on, having a cup of tea and checking the weather forecast in Paris. Then he'd have to phone the 67 relatives to inform them of my perilous situation. By the time he got off the phone to my Auntie Mary my virtue would be long lost.

What would your dear old dad do?

Annunziata Fri 15-May-15 23:11:24

I hate that bloody movie, I watched it the night before DD went on holiday, why oh why.

My daddy did not have allow me to go on holiday without him until I was married, so no kidnappers for me.

DH would go fucking mental.

olbas Fri 15-May-15 23:13:24

Absolutely nothing grin after a few years months he might ask my brother if he had heard from me.

thetroubleis Fri 15-May-15 23:13:38

He would have gotten himself a P51 and strafed the buggers. Bit of a warbirds enthusiast.

However if it were my daughter she'd be home by the time my lazy bugger DP was dragging himself out of bed. Luckily I'm a dab hand with a Glock.

owlonabike Fri 15-May-15 23:13:40

My dad would complain that I wasn't around to visit him.

SirChenjin Fri 15-May-15 23:14:14

I'm not sure that my Dad would know what a Parisian sex trafficker was tbh. Once it was explained to him, I suspect he would use it as an excuse to get another holiday in - he'd pay a quick visit to the Gendarmerie, let them know what had happened, and then fly on somewhere from CdG airport. He might remember to phone us when he got back, just to make sure I was home safely.

GiddyOnZackHunt Fri 15-May-15 23:16:49

If you gave him some wine he'd be ready to take them on.
Otherwise he'd ask my dB to have a word with his scary friends.

Koalafications Fri 15-May-15 23:17:00

Taken is such a shit film.

I think my DF would be similar to Liam Neeson. He's pretty scary and has a fierce "I'll kill anyone who touches my family" streak in him.

MitzyLeFrouf Fri 15-May-15 23:18:06

thetroubleis you and your father sound like useful people to have around!

AgentProvocateur Fri 15-May-15 23:18:27

He'd probably ask my mum what to do wink

CuttedUpPear Fri 15-May-15 23:18:35

In his prime my dad would have called up some old dubious acquaintances to help out and driven over there himself at breakneck speed.
In fact he did do something a bit like that for me once when XP was holding onto DD (age 2) after an arranged visit and refusing to return her to me.
He drove up there and got her.
My hero.

Summerisle1 Fri 15-May-15 23:20:59

My father was a bent copper. I can only assume he'd have called in some sort of equally dodgy connections in the Sûreté. From what my mother has told me about him I rather doubt he'd have crossed the channel to do a job someone else owed him.

He'd write a strongly worded letter to somebody and leave it on the hall table for my mum to post next time she walked the dog... He might also make a few phone calls...

DramaAlpaca Fri 15-May-15 23:24:19

He'd get in touch with the traffickers, give them an absolute bollocking, and threaten to report them to their bosses if they didn't let me go at once. It would do the trick as my dad always gets what he wants. When he'd rescued me he'd spend ages telling me it was all my own fault that I got kidnapped and that it would never have happened if I'd done as I was told.

Whiskwarrior Fri 15-May-15 23:24:56

Sadly, my Dad does not have the very specific set of skills required for yhis situation.

And it takes him hours to get out of bed. I'd have to wait while he has a cup of tea, a fag, some toast, more tea, finishes his chapter in his book, has a nap, repeat cycle.

And he drives a Vauxhall Zafira. Would that work?

JasmineBuckles Fri 15-May-15 23:29:38

Well, as the last time I visited , and apologised for leaving it so long he said,

"It doesn't matter, we aren't particularly attached to you"

I would say he would probably do fuck all. He might google "jasminebuckes trafficked" then when nothing came up would book his next holiday.

AlpacaPicnic Fri 15-May-15 23:30:25

My father had a top secret military position for several years - to this day, over 25 years later I still do not know what he did or where he did it - and later went on to be an armed policeman with extensive weapons and evasive driving training...

I suspect he might make a phone call, but probably just to the current police. He's a firm believer in procedure...!

cogitosum Fri 15-May-15 23:32:07

He'd have asked a mate with a shotgun to help out.

Freestripe Fri 15-May-15 23:32:49

Haha! I came on this thread to give you all a stern telling-off, but ended up laughing at the responses!

DoTheDuckFace Fri 15-May-15 23:33:02

My would talk about how he was going to kill them whilst drinking a can of bitter.

OscarWinningActress Fri 15-May-15 23:36:31

I have no idea confused. My Dad is an enigma...he's brilliant, daffy, hilarious, intense, hardworking, selfish-but-kind-when-it-counts. I honestly don't know...I suspect he might call in some of his over-achiever global pals? He's a MASSIVE cinephile, but favours odd things like Japanese martial arts films from the 1970s. Perhaps he would channel that?

itsintherobot Fri 15-May-15 23:38:08

Mine would work out the best way to pay a tax deductable ransom, come and get me whilst pausing to pay some wine on the way home and getting me to carry it through customs.

ludovica Fri 15-May-15 23:41:40

He'd tell me it was all my fault and that if I had stayed in to study computational physics wearing a fair isle cardi it wouldn't have happened.

ClaimedByMe Fri 15-May-15 23:43:04

My dad would 'phone a man' that's his answer to everything!

Mypubesarestraight Fri 15-May-15 23:43:16

My dad wouldn't care.

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