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The utterly ridiculous / hysterical comments your friends come out with, in which you seriously question if they live on the same planet as you...[lighttheart]

(595 Posts)
daughterofafarmer Wed 02-Oct-13 11:26:31

My friend said this utter gem last week...

'I'm buying DS a 2nd pair of Wellingtons as I don't have an Aga to help dry out the wet pair....'

Another friend

'I don't think one should children until you can afford childcare'....Que me nearly spitting out my drink...

Pootles2010 Wed 02-Oct-13 13:04:34

Dobbie are you quite sure he didn't have mh issues? Does sound really rather worrying. BTW people with mh issues can be pleasant and intelligent too.

miffybun73 Wed 02-Oct-13 13:06:22

mrsGeologist and Obamaself - I feel bad at laughing at these, surely the people in question are in the bottom few% of IQs, can't hold down a job, live independently etc. sad

BuzzardBirdBloodBath Wed 02-Oct-13 13:07:04

I had a friend on FB Dobbie who was doing the same. I had to delete her when she posted that Mothers were responsible for their baby's cot deaths if they had allowed them to have inoculations sad

WaitingForMe Wed 02-Oct-13 13:07:19

My favourite was when I was living in Malaysia and my friend asked about the guy I was dating. I said he was pretty cool and had ridden to Cambodia on his motorbike. How did he do that she asked, utterly bewildered. He rode North, through Thailand and into Cambodia I said perplexed.

She was staggered that this was possible. She thought you had to fly between countries and had never heard of crossing borders overland. She was studying tourism at the time and had previously gone to Singapore overland.

She is now working in tourism.

ObamasElfWithAOuijaBoard Wed 02-Oct-13 13:09:03

I think I should add that my friend is really bright and very good at her job. She can just be a bit....thoughtless?

Sparklysilversequins Wed 02-Oct-13 13:10:41

"And do you still hold such incredibly right wing views?"

After I mentioned I was in the army for a couple of years.

"Have you ever considered that your ds's problems may be because you and his Dad split up?"

Ds has ASD, Dyspraxia, hypermobility and sensory processing disorder.

SPBisResisting Wed 02-Oct-13 13:14:30

Sparkly tbh that's just nasty and ignorant.
I hope you told them where to stick their views!

MrsGeologist Wed 02-Oct-13 13:21:05

No, she was very good at her job, and had been to university, she wasn't stupid. Her grasp of general knowledge was just god awful.

Sparklysilversequins Wed 02-Oct-13 13:21:37

You know, I didn't because I was still at that stage where I could scarcely deal with it myself. I tried to earnestly explain why it wasn't that all, while he smirked at me with his smug know it all face. I remember it every time I see him and involuntarily clench my fists grin even though he's always very nice since my SECOND child was diagnosed with ASD. He's never apologised though.

Calabria Wed 02-Oct-13 13:21:39

At work I was asked my plans for the weekend by a regular patient. I replied that I was going to a science fiction convention.

"I didn't know you believed in UFOs"!


miffybun73 Wed 02-Oct-13 13:24:41

But MrsGeologist I find that remarkable.

I am completely shock

MaidOfStars Wed 02-Oct-13 13:26:06

"We went to see [film name] in 3D last week. It looked ace. Wouldn't it be brilliant if real life was in 3D?".

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Wed 02-Oct-13 13:29:39

My friend likes to tell people how well her daughter is doing in school. Apparently she's top of the class for reading.

If she ever bothered to get involved, or turn up for parents evening, or do the school run every once in a while instead of getting her mum to do it, or even looked at the bloody reading diary and did a bit of reading at home with her dd, she would know that her dd is really struggling with reading and has to have extra help. I know this because I help out at school. I probably read with her daughter more than she does. In fact I know I do because I have never seen anything from her in the reading diary. hmm

Choccyjules Wed 02-Oct-13 13:29:58

Am aware this one may excite a branch of MN but here goes:

My friend recently complaining that her DD2 won't stop BF aged 18 months. 'I can't explain to her, you see. I could talk about it to DD2 as she was a year older than that when I stopped feeding her'.

Me (sorry folks) hmm

Stropzilla Wed 02-Oct-13 13:31:55

Are fish arboreal or amphibious?

Er neither DH. Try aquatic. What's worse was he was looking at OUR fish at the time!
And from the same man while picking fruit:

What are these plummy looking things?
Those would be plums. He's really very clever honest!

Housewife2010 Wed 02-Oct-13 13:35:13

One of my friends said to our friend (who we knew was suffering from cancer) "Oh Wow, Have you lost weight?" My second friend did point out to the first that she wasn't feeling particularly hungry.

Pagwatch Wed 02-Oct-13 13:35:24

I love the 'wouldn't it be great if real life was in 3D' one MaidOfStars

wem Wed 02-Oct-13 13:37:50

Choccyjules that's an utterly ridiculous/hysterical comment is it? Seems a pretty straightforward statement on the difference between weaning an 18-month-old and a 2 and a half year old to me.

DisappointedHorse Wed 02-Oct-13 13:38:00

My normally intelligent DH: what's the difference between a chicken and a hen?
Me: Er, a hen is a female chicken
DH: please do not tell anyone I asked that!

HeirToTheIronThrone Wed 02-Oct-13 13:42:32

My lovely friend - who has a degree from Oxford - was convinced she didn't need her passport for our holiday to France "because it's in the EU"...

Pagwatch Wed 02-Oct-13 13:42:42

A friend who I love and is very smart was talking with me about DS2 and his forthcoming 17th birthday.
(DS2 has severe difficulties, functions at about age 5 level)

'do you think he will manage driving lessons?'

I am all for positivity but I was confused
In fairness, after an awkward silence, she and I did both go 'ermmmmm. Possibly not?' at the same time andd laughed about it.

Thistledew Wed 02-Oct-13 13:47:48

"I don't see the problem with sweatshops. If you work in one you wouldn't have time to learn about other jobs - it would be all you knew so you wouldn't feel abused."

"Back in the olden days everyone had servants".

From someone I was doing post-graduate studies with. To be fair, when I pointed out the lack of logic in his comments he did appear genuinely surprised and admitted it made no sense.

SPsTwerkingNineToFive Wed 02-Oct-13 13:48:01

"Shes obviously lying about been unwell, probably sat in front of the fire or something"

Mums friend said about me to my mum. I ended up in hospital with meningococcal that night.

"My daughter walked after her operation so why cant <SPs>"
Said to my mum by woman from above after I had been run over at 11. I had 4 operations to save the leg and had metal rods sticking out of it as well as missing muscle. The hospital gave me a wheel chair to use.

The operation her daughter had? She had her tonsils out! grin It was hilariously mental.

"I know you want to be bridesmaid but your leg wont look good in the pictures"

Uncle due to having scars from accident. I had just got out of a cast and starting to wall properly and the fucker took my bridesmaid duty off me.

georgedawes Wed 02-Oct-13 13:49:38

"I wasn't sick when I was pregnant because I hate being sick so therefore I stopped myself. I think the nausea was actually worse for me but I can't bear to be sick." hmm

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Wed 02-Oct-13 13:49:39

Solitude your SIL sounds a charmer.

Sparkly words fail me. And that doesn't happen often.

Ilovemydog that's sad.

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