Just had the worst job interview ever. Anyone else care to share?(330 Posts)
I am morto and at myself. I was in and out in 20 mins .
I am used to initiating meeting with new clients and thought I had prepared well. I was so nervous, I had to keep drinking water to stop my lips from sticking to my teeth. It was all I could think about. None of the answers I prepared were useful. I need to rewind and do over because I have better answers now (after the nick of time).
I threw up during an interview once.
In my younger years I was applying for a job as a medic. It was a 24 hour hands on interview with an experienced paramedic crew. Well about 5 hours in I started to get a migrane but it was so busy - call after call, there was no heading it off...the culmination of which was vomiting in the ambulance (though thankfully not on or in the presence of a patient). Still, they wouldn't believe me about the headache and kept banging on about my being too stressed and sensitive for the job .
Very embarassing. I still cringe.
Oh yes , if you are down to the final 2 and don't get the job, wait a couple of weeks and send an email to the manager/hr saying you are still interested in the role and if there is anything else in the company you would be interested. Some people don't make it past probation period.
Went to one, and the main interveiwer asked me if I spoke French. I said yes, wondering what this had to do with anything as it was a uk company, everyone was a brit, nothing about France in the spec. He immediately continued the interview in French only, much the horror of the other interviewers and refused to speak English!!!! Totally mad.
Just laughed out loud at Mutt's setting off an alarm and causing the building to be evacuated.
I have two offerings: First, I was waiting to go into the interview room, waiting in the staff room next to the coffee machine. Someone that worked there came in and poured himself a coffee, somehow tripped as he turned away and threw the coffee all over me. (He was very apologetic and at least coffee must have been sitting around a while in the pot as I didn't get scalded). I was called into the interview room almost immediately after, with no time to do more than a bit of ineffective dabbing with a tissue, had to go in looking totally shellshocked and dripping in coffee. I didn't get the job.
Second time, I had a horrendous ear infection (had been awake the whole of the night sobbing with pain) and was effectively completely deaf during the interview. Had to ask for each question to be repeated numerous times while I squinted desperately trying to lipread the interviewer. Probably answered the wrong question more than once. I didn't get that job either.
Not mine but this thread reminded me of Anthony Bourdains Kitchen Confidential.
So he has an interview at a steakhouse. He feels extremely confident, chats away, job is his and then the owner asks him, What do you know about me?
He is and thinking that is he famous? Should I know something? Should I pretend to know?? panic!! And then decides to go for the honest approach and says "Absolutely nothing!"
Interview panel laughs uncomfortably, interview is obviously over.
Only a while later Mr Bourdain realises that what they actually asked him, for a position of chef in a steakhouse was: What do you know about MEAT?
Interviewing a candidate for a web design position in local government: candidate offered to show me his designs on his laptop but should probably have deleted the soft porn image on his homepage before beginning his demonstration.
I once got asked 'When was the last time you showed initiative?' in an interview and honestly couldn't think of anything so there was a LONG long silence before they moved on to the next question. They came back to initiative a couple more times but I was still stumped so in the end they let it go.
At the end, they asked me if I had any questions for them. 'When was the last time YOU showed initiative?' I blurted out straight away. They couldn't answer either.
Weirdly, they offered me the job. I'm now self employed but have a rehearsed and ready to roll story about the last time I showed initiative all prepared just in case I ever have the misfortune to do an interview again.
I knew a young man who had studied Russian O level at school and gone on to do A level Russian Studies and other allied subjects. He had an interview at the Foreign Office and the interview panel said something like, "Sell youself to us." Engaging his phenomenal brain cell, he asked, "Right, who'll start at £1000?" He got no further.
I interviewed at the BBC a few years ago. It was going ok when they asked me "What do you think of XXXX XXXX [BBC Celebrity]?" I replied that I wasn't really a fan, and thought he was unfunny, childish and a misogynist. Silence from the panel until "...Oh well that's unfortunate because in this role you would be working alongside him on his team".
Didn't get the job
Went for an interview a few years back. Nervous doesnt quiet cover it. Hands were trembling, missed the chair, got the person who arranged the interview position wrong, forgot my name, forgot several of the questions, babbled on about totally irrelevent things. Spilt water over myself because hands were trembling... Thought it was a wind up a few days later when I got a call offering the job. The interviewee was able to look past the goofs, and offered me a trial.
The person interviewing me had never conducted an interview before, as a result they were unprepared, with no real questions and couldn't tell me anything useful about the job, other than the days/hours
neglected to say that you had to do a solid 8 hour shift with no break among other things
I ended up interviewing myself.... Still got the job
I forgot to blend my foundation in properly, and spent the interview with an orange ring around my mouth. I didn't get it. Not too worried, it was an interview set up with an agency desperate for their fees and I really was unsuitable for the job, and both the interviewer and I knew it from the moment I walked in and we both wondered why I'd been sent for it!
Today I witnessed an interview in McDonalds of all places! Seemed to be textbook, if a bit rehersed with her asking his strengths and him answering oh, teamwork. I expected him to tell her his weakness was working too hard! As they left, he went out the door first, and his trousers were hanging so low off his hips you could see his hairy butt crack! She noticed and couldn't take here eyes off the atrocity!
Oh and the person I interviewed who got back for a second interview. Gave her a trial week, after which she turned out to be completely the wrong person for the job. As she stropped out, she growled "so this has been a complete waste of my time then! You should at least pay my petrol!". Attitude was only one of her problems.
I was interviewed for a job editing the mag of the National Union of Seamen, about thirty years ago. 'Seamen' was a tricky one, I kept having to say 'seafarers', which sounded oddly jack tar-ish, but 'seamen' would certainly have made me laugh or blush.
It was going OK - just one chap; then John Prescott walked in.
He seemed positive at first; he liked that I'd studied for my degree 'externally', at a second division college, not at London University itself. But then I was asked what I'd do to improve the existing NUS mag.
I came up with something about using a lot more pictures. John Prescott said something like 'This is a union magazine not a vehicle for social chit-chat' (which hadn't been what I'd meant at all.)
He also went on to ask if I was likely to jack it all in when I got married! (Marriage wasn't on the cards then in any case.)
I wasn't offered the job, but was mightily offended when the nice first interviewer rang me afterwards to say 'Athough you're not being offered the job, John Prescott asks if you would like a secretarial position?'
I walked into a building and as my foot went over the threshold the fire alarm went off... Turned round and walked right back home again.
Rang the job agency and explained .... Went back the next day, interviewer was my mates god father who I knew well! Got the job, love him dearly still even though we were all made redundant about 14 yrs ago.
no preparation, went to interview without even application form, agency just called them. I'd been clearing a basement at my voluntary job, knew I had no chance of the new job, rocked up unprepared and filthy. did the IT test badly, casually chatted through the interview, didn't return the phone calls telling me Ihadn't got it. Of course I had got the 10 week temp job which lasted 5 years. I got it because I was the only applicant who could decipher the boss' writing.
Someone I know left the interview room and found herself in a cupboard!! She still got the job!
Once had a horrible local government interview where I had studied up on them and their plans, only to spend 20mins being asked about a recently published book about the local football team. Which I hadn't read of course. And didn't get the job.
Worse thing is I complained to my mum about it and she told me off, as her brother features heavily in the book as the teams most committed fan!
I went for a job some years ago in a corrupt London borough. One of the other candidates was a former councillor called Fred. I heard later that the selection meeting was the simple sentence "all those in favour of Fred raise their hands"
Have never had a really bad interview, not to say I always got the job though.
I had one interview where the interviewer clearly had not read my CV at all. I had a specific qualification, that I had worked really hard for, and in my opinion was a pretty important qualification in order to do the role.
Anyway, she said to me "not many of our team have this qualificaiton, in fact the people we meet who do are pretty much up their own arses". I said "really"?
I then got offered the position but based out of a completely different office to the one I applied to work in.
I said no. We wouldn't have got on if they all thought I was up my own arse.
I reckon I got my first job because the other girl applying was gorgeous, and my boss had a very jealous wife!
This got a genuine laugh out loud -
" I fell over a potato on the way out the room after an interview. Im surprised the job offer they had just made me wasn't retracted on the spot."
FakeGingerbreadHouse do explain!
While signing on in December 2005 i got an interview at a building society in the town that is half an hours drive away. Interview was at 1pm so i thought that catching 11am bus should get me there in plenty of time. Bus didnt show up Neither did the next one.
So i went into the Job Centre which was right across the road directly across from the Job Centre so the fuckers could see that id been standing there waiting all that time!
Yet when i went into Job Centre and asked if they would help with train fare they said no and the silly cow on the front desk who had clearly SEEN me waiting at bus stop all that time shouted out that I had MISSED the bus.
So had to take the money to get train instead out of food budget.
Phoned through to interviwer and apologised for the fact i was going to be late.
Posted too soon (have to Talk talk) got to interview and duriing interview she accused me of getting the sack from two jobs because i got made redundant twice in the space of a year. Once was due to illness and the second time was because the business i worked for went bust.
She wouldnt have it though. I didnt get the job.
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