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Care to join me in my "Great TV shows they should make, but won't" thread? I'll start.

(218 Posts)
lashingsofbingeinghere Mon 12-Nov-12 15:28:34

"Escape to Cakes in the Attic".

<property porn - tick: baking - tick; antiques - tick>

JammySplodger Wed 14-Nov-12 14:26:47

Bob The Builder X-Rated - the post-watershed version where Bob gets it on with Wendy.

JammySplodger Wed 14-Nov-12 14:28:34

Supernanny - same format but with a nanny goat who butts naughty kids into behaving themselves.

JammySplodger Wed 14-Nov-12 14:29:52

Stars In Their Pies - Brian Cox combines experimental physics with cookery.

KurriKurri Wed 14-Nov-12 14:33:28

Ten Second Makeover -Claire Sweeney runs in to your house and flings a bucket of paint over your sofa.

Dickinson's Ronseal Deals - David explains how he achieves that much envied shade of mahogany.

bakerbakerfairycaker Wed 14-Nov-12 14:39:55


Has anyone emailed this thread to Channel 5 yet? wink

GetAllTheThings Wed 14-Nov-12 14:40:39

Top Greer Germane Greer reviews today's cars from a feminist perspective whilst perching on Jeremy Clarkson's testicles.

Absy Wed 14-Nov-12 14:54:12

Ooh, I would LOVE to watch Top Greer.

GetAllTheThings Wed 14-Nov-12 15:05:51

This Morning with Naomi Campbell

Viewers donate via text until £10,000 is reached at which point she gets out of bed, throws her mobile phone at a producer and storms out of the studio.

JammySplodger Wed 14-Nov-12 15:16:36

Move Your Car, Fucker Mr T. gets bad ass on parents parking badly at school pick up time.

TessOfTheBaublevilles Wed 14-Nov-12 15:19:48

21 Bump Street - TV drama where a young baby-faced cop, who can still pass for a student, goes undercover in the teenage parent unit of a US high school.

GetAllTheThings Wed 14-Nov-12 15:20:58

Last of the Summer Whine

A live show where studio audience members complain about how crap the summer was.

Z-Cars Low grade celebs are driven around Romford in an old Ford Mondeo.

JammySplodger Wed 14-Nov-12 15:21:46

Sir, You Have A Woman's Arse - fashion advice for the modern gentleman in the style of Blackadder. (inspired by the bloke walking in front of me on the way to school just now).

TessOfTheBaublevilles Wed 14-Nov-12 15:29:46

Git Parade - join us for a countdown of this week's biggest gits. Don't forget to send us your nominations to

Top of the Flops - a weekly look at some of the biggest flops in history. During week one, we take a look at Daybreak, and ask what went wrong?

GetAllTheThings Wed 14-Nov-12 15:39:44

It's a Knockout / Mumsnet edition

Mums fire massive buns at each other with a large catapult, dressed as comedy trolls, whilst on a revolving oiled platform.

It's a Knockout / Dadsnet edition

A large catapult stands idle next to empty comedy troll costumes, whilst an empty revolving oiled platform goes around.

Absy Wed 14-Nov-12 15:57:31

Top of the Cops - local PCs give live performances of their interpretations of the Hit Parade in sparkly costumes, removable skirts and whatever takes their fancy. Presented by Dale Winton

MardyBra Wed 14-Nov-12 16:29:32

Britain's Got Tarrant
A popular new show where Chris Tarrant is incarcerated for the duration of the series and viewers vote for a selection of grueling tasks or punishments.
This week: A Red Room of Pain special.

MardyBra Wed 14-Nov-12 16:35:23

How To Look Good Dressed with Gok Wan
A makeover show in which he doesn't persuade some unsuspecting woman with low self esteem to strip off to provide sensationalist TV in order to boost her confidence, never once patronises her, calls her "girlfriend" or squeezes her "bangers".

AuLaitAuLait Wed 14-Nov-12 16:45:12

Hee hee!
the last of the antiques road trip
Celebrity antiques experts attempt to find bargains in aunty's shop

RuleBritannia Wed 14-Nov-12 16:47:03

I'll be boring and just suggest period dramas from early 20th century books - for instance, GH Wells, Bartimeus, P C Wren.

GetAllTheThings Wed 14-Nov-12 16:48:51


Two women from Liverpool eat copious amounts of baked beans.

( apologies for use of 'birds' )

RuleBritannia Wed 14-Nov-12 16:49:55

*H G Wells

MardyBra Wed 14-Nov-12 16:58:16

South Park in Balamory
Episode 3: Archie the Inventor is a little flustered when he is flashed by Cartman.

MardyBra Wed 14-Nov-12 16:59:32

Dr Why A new Dr Who franchise aimed for 3-4 year olds.

MardyBra Wed 14-Nov-12 16:59:38


SuffolkNWhat Wed 14-Nov-12 17:00:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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