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If my 3yo had access to AIBU...

(390 Posts)
allhailtheaubergine Thu 15-Sep-11 17:25:24

AIBU to throw my bowl of pear across the kitchen?

Earlier today I demanded that my mother stop what she was doing and immediately get me a pear. She is by nature a difficult woman and she insisted on finishing her wee and washing her hands first hmm. I explained loudly that this was unacceptable but, typically for her, my protestations only made her more stubborn. Then she moved the goalposts and decided that I could only have my pear if I said "please" (actually I worry about her in this respect - she is utterly obsessed with that word, it's not normal) so I stormed around the house for 25 minutes or so and then eventually gave in and said please (so now she'll think if she holds out long enough I'll end up saying "please" every time - made a rod for my own back there hmm).

Anyway, she asked me if I wanted the pear to be cut up or whole. I replied "cutted up" and the utter arse of a woman cut up my pear! shock I was speechless with rage! Obviously, words were not enough to express my fury so I threw the cutted up pear across the kitchen and kicked her in the shins.


I think she genuinely thinks I am BU and it's causing me to doubt myself. What do you think?

Several posts later [dripfeed]:

Oh, and then I weed in my shorts because I was still cross. That'll learn her.

caramelwaffle Thu 15-Sep-11 17:53:53


Pears are for crushing into rugs, not eating. That'll learn you.

Becaroooo Thu 15-Sep-11 17:59:20

my mother actually dared to tell me off when I picked some berries off a bush and tried to eat them.....they looked very lovely and red and yummy. She marched me indoors, gave a massive lecture (yawn) about only putting good things in our mouths (so, thats why she gets through catering size packs of malteesers???) and washed my hands and made my sleeves all wet and then made me brush my teeth too!

The woman is insane

I got my revenge by tipping my apple juice all over the floor and hiding her hairbrush

<<whispers>> its in the bin!!!

Mouseface Thu 15-Sep-11 18:00:53


I think you need to tell her calmly and in a measured way how she makes you feel when she displays behaviour of this sort.

I think you are very brave and probably living in constant bewilderment as to why she insists on these 'rules'.

Everyone knows that cars are for killing the bad guys that live in the telly, surely?

Have you considered counselling at all? Or maybe going to stay with a relative for a night to give yourself a break? She's obviously unhinged.......

I mean, denying you food just so that she wash her hands, is a bit harsh IMO.

You could keep a diary of events, a chart if you like, then show her when she has been bad, had time out, had to use the naughty step etc but also, when she's good, you could reward her with treats and a nice sticker on the chart so she can see the cause and effect of her behaviour.

And keep posting, we're all here to help you smile

KeepInMind Thu 15-Sep-11 18:00:54

Funniest thing I have read in ages.
Well done op grin

Peachy Thu 15-Sep-11 18:01:19

YABU clearly- had you taken the pear, chewed it a little then hidden as far down the back of their newest sofa as possible you would have had a much bigger effect.

You are also BU for weeing your pants: don't you know that you should have done that three metres in front of her as she was on the toilet, just outside her reach and frustratingly close to the loo? You're such a beginner!.

Pears thrown at TVs as well- what is this, the best way to deal with a TV (especially one not tuned ito scooby doo) is to frisbee a plate at it. Glasses are useful underneath a table where they are not seen until someone treads on their shards.

There's something horrible about any squished fruit oir veg in a pilow case as well.

Don't worry, keep going and you will get there: I am only the preschooler I am today thanks to my 3 elder brothers.


SmallestPeach (3.5)

kenobi Thu 15-Sep-11 18:02:02

I understand you pain, OP. This morning my stupid mother did not realise that while I was LOUDLY requesting a nappy change because I had done a poo, expecting me to lie down or even stand still for said nappy change is right out of the question.
She is an adult for christ's sake. Surely changing a very full and sloppy nappy while at a flat run should be easy for her?!

Poor You, OP.sad

Your life sounds like a bed of roses compared to mine, however. My Mother reduced me to tears the other day by refusing to let me eat my sandwich with a spoon.

I got her back this morning though, by opening a whole box of what I think were christmas decorations and hanging them up by their pretty blue strings.

MiniBitter 2.8

Mouseface Thu 15-Sep-11 18:16:17

There is help out there for you all. Such a sad thread to read. Maybe you could all get in touch with a local support group?

MiniBitter - your mother sounds utterly vile. Did you not explain to her that spoons are essential for hand/eye co-ordination?


SmallestPeach - maybe you could help others like yourself by sharing your expertise?

I feel for you. It's time more of you spoke up and we heard!

EmmaBemma Thu 15-Sep-11 18:18:47


Although, I doubt my four year old would ever wonder whether she's being unreasonable. If there was a forum called "I HAVE GOT A HORRIBLE MUMMY AND I HATT HER" she would definitely post there, though.

startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 18:22:41

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startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 18:24:11

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Lisatheonewhoeatsdrytoast Thu 15-Sep-11 18:24:32

YANBU obviously the woman is mad!!

Mine doesn't understand my "art" i mean drawing all over the white boring walls in the hall is adding colour surely?"
Plus she's always doing that "please" thing, i mean really what is YOUR obsession with it!
She needs to understand that cutting does not mean cutting unless i mean it... got it? I did the same to my mother, she cut my ruddy fajita in half after i said yes to cutting it, i mean...grrr! So of course, i threw it over the kitchen and then poured the cranberry juice onto the floor (which wouldn't happen if she just bought the fruit shoots!)


Mouseface Thu 15-Sep-11 18:28:28

See, this is the kind of thing you should all be sharing, you need to tell people out your mothers.

Free expression of art at this age is essential for expanding the imagination. Lisa. Have you thought about maybe drawing on your dry toast? Would this be possible, expand your horizons, walls and toast?

And SAF - sleeves are for that very purpose........ hankies are so unhygienic. YUK! Fart jokes are the building blocks for social acceptance at this age, what is your mother thinking of?

TidyDancer Thu 15-Sep-11 18:35:43

Oh this has really made my day! Thank you for the shuddering laughs!

P.S. CLEARLY your DM is BU. grin

stinkyfluffycat Thu 15-Sep-11 18:35:50

YABU if you failed to get any on the ceiling.

LoveInAColdClimate Thu 15-Sep-11 18:36:51


butterflyexperience Thu 15-Sep-11 18:39:50


startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 18:40:25

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Mouseface Thu 15-Sep-11 18:43:33

Oh SAF sad Please, remember that one day, you'll be free of her. Keep fighting for what you believe in - fart jokes, snot lined sleeves, Ben 10 on a continuous loop 24/7 denying the viewing of any intellectual TV, sugar on your Sugar Puffs, no fruit before chocolate!

Stand and be counted! You're not alone.

5inthebed Thu 15-Sep-11 18:44:10

Have you tried a Positive Toddlering course?

CardyMow Thu 15-Sep-11 18:44:52

Oh, I have a lot to learn from you all! Today, my Mummy was most unreasonable. I was just having an adventure and squishing my hands into some sloppy squidgy stuff, when my Mummy shouted at me saying something like that's your sister's Homework - she worked so hard to build that WW1 trench out of mud (what IS a trench anyway? It felt nice and squidgy!) and she picked me up and moved me away from the table.

I showed my displeasure by throwing myself backwards and hitting my head of the floor, going a strange shade of puce, kicking my legs a lot and screaming VERY loudly in my Mummy's ear. I'm sure my sister wouldn't mind me playing with the squidgy stuff, even if it was homework.

I have a LOT to learn I see. I am taking notes, and will try harder next time my Mummy IBU.

Yours, LittleKitten4, 7.5mo.

MrGin Thu 15-Sep-11 18:45:51

dadda say 'no more shaun the sheep' . I want shaun sheep. dadda give banana and break banana in two. Who eat broken banana ?!?!! Banana broke, want nother one. Don't care there no other one, want one. an unbroken one . Don't care shop closed. Want new unbroken banana !! dadda tries to put banana back together. banana falls apart. so bang table and make boo-hoo. Want Shaun sheep.! Want new unbroken banana.!

Want Shaun sheep.!

Want pee-pee but not tell daddy.

daddy let me watch shaun sheep. but want one with the funny man not the one with the kite, daddy find one with funny man and put on ..... don't want one with funny man, want one with kite. daddy ask do I want pee-pee. Yes I want pee-pee but watching shaun sheep. say not want pee-pee.

daddy say am i sure i not want pee-pee. ignore daddy. daddy tries to feed me broken banana. NOT WANT BROKEN BANANA !!!!!!!

daddy look at me funny way. daddy say ' i think you need a pee-pee.

i tell daddy i NOT WANT PEE-PEE !

ooh look half a banana. result. eat banana.

do pee pee on chair.

startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 18:49:50

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fit2drop Thu 15-Sep-11 18:53:24

If I see one more
"stay away from AIBU " I will direct the poster to this thread.

I have been in a shit mood all day and this has cheered me up no end.


startAfire Thu 15-Sep-11 18:55:01

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