Want to buy a gift for women and families in a refuge this Christmas?

[RowanMumsnet]

Hello [santa]

As lots of you know, each year Refuge sets up a special gift list at John Lewis to provide gifts for women and children in their shelters.

If you fancy buying something off the list, here's the link.

And here's what Refuge have to say about it:

"As you may know, every year Refuge runs a Christmas appeal to collect presents for the women and children in our services, to make Christmas as special as possible for the women and children we support who are fleeing domestic violence. We try to ensure that everyone we're supporting gets around 2-3 gifts."

"The majority of women often flee their abusive partner in the middle of the night, too afraid to risk collecting their belongings. Many women arrive with little more than the clothes they and their children are wearing."

Here's the link again

Thanks all

[Whatdoidohelp]

This is fantastic but..... John Lewis? There are many more affordable retailers that offers list services. Just had a quick browse - £12 for a pair of kids slippers? I wouldn't even spend that on my own children.

[vEGANvERA]

I would be keen to support. Do they cover Northern Ireland or just the mainland?

[Didiusfalco]

Thats a good point what. Would be helpful to know if John Lewis are chipping in as a result of having the gift list with them?

[BackforGood]

What makes a very good point.
John Lewis is an expensive shop to shop at.
I collected for Project Shoebox (toiletries for families in refuges) and received a lot of support from my friends for that, but, I'm not going to spend ridiculous amounts on items you could get much more reasonably elsewhere.

[Paintedhandprints]

Lovely idea op. I'm more inclined toward a donation or emergency parcel. Jl is very expensive. I could buy 2moses baskets elsewhere for £55!

[RumAppleGinger]

I understand the need to buy good quality toys but I can't help but feel the money spent here could go so much further at a different retailer. I don't want to put a downer on it because it's something I care about and would like to donate to but £21 for finger puppets? £15 for a book of Christmas stories? It's just too much.

[Pyjamaramadrama]

It's a fantastic cause and we support this locally but what has said what I was not brave enough to.

Why is it John Lewis? There are quality items available far healer elsewhere. What good are gift vouchers for John Lewis if you've fled your home? I say that as someone who's been there. Are John Lewis chipping in here?

[ImperialBlether]

It's a fantastic idea but I'm not happy to buy something from John Lewis - it's just unnecessarily expensive. If I was going to spend £12 I'd rather buy three pairs of slippers from Asda rather than one pair from JL.

I'd really like it if MN set up weekends where we collected money for Women's Aid. Lots of recommendations are made for people to phone Women's Aid for help and it would be great if once in a while (eg monthly) we could pay £1 or £2 in through PayPal which went directly to them.

[EmpressOfTheVulvaCupcakes]

I did Project Shoebox too and filled a box with toiletries for under £35. Which seems a lot more realistic tbh.

I see there's a bit on the site about converting all the pledges into vouchers and the staff buying the gifts with them. Is that why it all has to be one shop?

[QuizteamBleakley]

I'd worked out I could afford about £40 - but £40 in JL equates to around £70 - £80 in Asda / Lidl etc so I'm going to take a donation of goods directly to my local refuge.

[ImperialBlether]

Do you know where your local refuge is, Quiz? I thought they didn't give out their addresses. I would rather do what you're doing, too.

[Pyjamaramadrama]

Round here they have collection drop offs for the local refuges. At police stations etc

[BifsWif]

I give directly to refuges too. JL is too expensive. If you use google to find a phone number most refuges will give you an address to send parcels to.

[MrsJayy]

No disrespect to john lewis but it seems a bit elitist (maybe not the right word) but it is a very expensive shop i cant afford JL for me far less anybody else we would probably be better of donating locally and what we can afford

[specialsubject]

I'm afraid that a lot of those gifts look identical to poundland or Wilkinson items. JL is well known as an expensive luxury shop and everyone deserves a treat; but there's much better value available elsewhere.

nice idea, poor execution. Sorry. Project Shoebox was/is the way, or financial donations.

[lilydaisyrose]

Totally agree with pp ^^. I have donated a lovely brand new toy (bought at asda for £11 and was really lovely, easily something I'd have bought for my own DC). I am also going to do this this year (buy Christmas dinner for a homeless person in Scotland):-
www.itison.com/Edinburgh/deals/buy-a-homeless-person-xmas-dinner-social-bite--3
Scotland only, but am sure there are similar opportunities elsewhere.

[lilydaisyrose]

Should read -
I have donated a lovely brand new toy (bought at asda for £11 and was really lovely, easily something I'd have bought for my own DC) to the local toy collection for children living in poverty locally, campaign run by the local radio station.

[Toraleistripe]

Well I think it's a great idea. If you can't afford Jl then so be it. You can support people in need in the other ways that have been mentioned. If you can afford JL it is a quick and easy way to give a gift.

[lifesalongsong]

I have to agree with most of the other posters, if you want people in general to support this I don't think asking for things like a £6 notebook is realistic at all. Tbh it makes me not want to do it as the prices are ridiculous for what you get, you could get stationery supplies for a whole family for that price at a supermarket or similar.

[Akire]

Sadly agree an egg cup plate and mug set for £25 you can buy a plate set for a family for that. That's what people will really need.

[BifsWif]

It's not so much about not affording it, I'd rather get, and be able to give, more for my money that's all. Agree it's a great idea though.

[ohidoliketobe]

It's a lovely idea... but your money could go a lot further elsewhere. You can contact your local refuge for a drop off or a representative to do a pick up. Doesn't even have to be new stuff, I found my local one was very grateful for the newborn /maternity stuff I'd hardly used and didn't have the space to store if I have another DC.

[MrsJayy]

Yeah bifswif you can give more

[QuizteamBleakley]

Madelinehatter I don't think the 'problem' is whether I / we can afford John Lewis, it's that if I have £X I can buy 3 things in JL or 6,7, 8, ++ in Wilko / Aldi / Asda etc. Bluntly put: I can afford to spend £40 - I would rather buy EIGHT pairs of slippers over 3 pairs.

[JeffreySadsacIsUnwell]

Being cynical, I think someone's having a laugh with that list. I think it's supposed to resemble the kind of presents 'we' (the mythical average MNer) will be buying for our own family.

The small print does say that none of these presents will actually be bought - the 'present' you buy gets converted to vouchers, and 'the same or similar' item gets bought as a present. So yes, I'd guess there's a deal behind the scenes and economies of scale have to come into it somewhere. That Moses basket for £55 would probably get converted into 3 or 4 of their white waffle Moses baskets (RRP £35... Worth it though, ours survived four children -not all ours - and has been passed onto a 5th!). I mean, why on earth would you give a playdoh advent calendar on Christmas Day? It'll get converted into the equivalent plus a bit in vouchers and buy some JL own brand craft stuff, IMO.

I regularly shop at JL (yesterday being the most recent gift purchase there) but I don't see much on that list that I'd buy for ourselves, it's all overpriced stuff. I think it's basically to make people feel better about donating, they think they've chosen something and feel empathy. Give money if you prefer, there's that option too!