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please re-assure me that its all going to be ok?

(12 Posts)
bumblingalong Thu 04-Jun-09 20:38:15

Have just found out today that i'm expecting twins & having got over the initial shock & i'm happy with the news i'm now sat going over everything in my head. The most worrying thing is my dd will only be 18 months when they arrive- will she be able to use a buggy board or do i need a triple buggy? will they wake her in the night & keep her up? will it completely overwhelm her? i have hundreds of q's like this & i'm just looking for someone to pat me on the head & say everything will be fine & i will turn into mary poppins over night!.... anyone?

pollyblue Thu 04-Jun-09 20:52:22

Hello and congratulations! My dd had just turned 2 when my twins (also girls) were born this January. I tied myself in knots during the pregnancy, worrying how we would cope, but so far (touches wood) we're getting on ok, things just seem to fall (most days) into place.

If your little one is anything like mine she'll take in all in her stride. When we bought the twins home from the hospital she looked at one baby and said "ooh, baby!" then looked a bit aghast at the second and said "MORE baby!". She enjoys helping me feed the babies, likes to pat them on the back to wind them and gives them her toys when they cry - she's pretty cool about it all.

I think the only bit of advice I can give you is try and get the twins into a routine, at least of sorts, which will give you 'chunks' of time during the day for you to concentrate on your dd. I've always fed them a good hour before dd's mealtimes, so I can eat with her and have a natter without needing to do anything with the twins at that time. And although they were waking - usually very loudly! - several times during the night for the first few weeks they didn't disturb her at all.

You'll be fine! Just let your dd adapt at her own pace and you'll have no worries smile

bumblingalong Thu 04-Jun-09 21:00:03

thank you! Have been really shocked & excited all day & now i've sat down to think my minds just gone into overdrive! my dd is a very placid happy-go-lucky little thing so i don't think i need to worry but as she's all i've worried about since she was born its gonna take a bit if adjusting to worry about 3! oh well cos we found out very early 've still got 7 1/2 months left to get my head around it! will definitely be looking into a routine as soon as we can tho!

pollyblue Thu 04-Jun-09 21:13:24

I found out early too, I had a scan at 8 weeks due to bleeding. I spent the next few weeks in a bit of a daze - punctuated by the odd fit of hysteria! - but by the time I got to the 12 week scan I was pretty relaxed about it. The more warning you have the better, i think!

Be sure to get as much rest as you can, eat well and plenty of early nights, I did find I got very tired in the last couple of months. Accept all offers of help and always make sure you've a good supply of choccie in the house.....grin. Everything looks brighter after a slab or four of dairy milk.

bumblingalong Thu 04-Jun-09 21:24:41

the one down side that i've found is chocolate brings on the morning sickness - hopefully it'll pass soon cos it's gonna be a while before i can get at that other mood lifter - wine!!
Was on a low dose of chlomid so was warned of increased chance of twins but didn't think it could happen to me, dr arranged for very early scan "to see how many we're dealing with" i'm only 6 wks.

pollyblue Thu 04-Jun-09 21:39:05

Oh God, morning sickness is vile isn't it? I'd (almost!) forgotten about that.

I can't blame chlomid, just my age (apparently the older you get the higher the chance of twins) and family history. When the sonographer said "is there any history of twins in your family?" I had a sudden flash of "oh yes, bugger it, two lots on my mum's parent's side!". So that was me well and truly done for grin

l39 Fri 05-Jun-09 11:03:30

Congratulations on your exciting news!
I had a longer gap (8yr old and 5yr old when twins were born) but was worried the twins couldn't be as placid and easy to cope with as the older two. They were, though, even though I never completely got the hang of breastfeeding both at once. It will be okay!

Bmum1 Fri 05-Jun-09 13:16:51

It will be fine. When I found out I was having twins I felt as if my world had fallen apart. I have two older DS aged 3 and 5 and I was appalled at the thought having to cope with two babies as well, but so far (the twins are four months now) all has gone far more smoothly than I imagined. The older boys love the twins, have never woken up no matter how loud they screamed at night (indeed the twins didn't even wake each other up), and they have been sleeping through since around 9 weeks.

Good luck with it, but I am sure it will be easier than you imagine.

niche Fri 05-Jun-09 20:11:28

Congratulations!!!

I was totally overwhelmed when I found out I was having twins (although I'd had my suspicions I hadn't really prepared), once it was confirmed I had a real worry, came on hear and found the multiple thread here is the latest where they put my mind at ease and actually it was better than I expected. Yes it's hard work but you soon get into a routine. It can't be all that bad as I went on to have ds3 16mths after. shock grin

My b/g dts are 2.5 now (ds3 is 14mths) and make me laugh so much. Watching them interact is wonderful and they get on great with their siblings (well as great as any children get along with each other really). I also have dd1 (4.9) and ds1 (6.4).

On the practical side I would not entertain the idea of a triple buggy and my one exp of a buggy board had me ebay it before it had even left the house. You'll need a double and a sling. I would get dd to walk and sling her as/when needed so dts can sleep in buggy and you can still get lots of interaction with her. But it would work equally well with one dt in sling and dd and other dt in buggy.

They may wake her up to begin with (mine always slept through) but again it's something she'll get used to very quickly.

Come join us on the thread if you haven't already and shout any other qs. smile

Oh and start preparing for the "you've got your hands full" comments. They will come thick and fast. hmm

accessorizequeen Fri 05-Jun-09 23:06:43

Congrats! It will be fine, there are lots of twin mums on here with a small age gap as well and we all cope. My middle ds was 21 months when they were born, he only walked at 17 months and we didn't need a triple buggy! I do think a strolli is a v.good idea, way better than buggy board for a little un but she may surprise you. You can always sling one of the babies so dd can hop in the buggy too, dp did that a bit.
It's hard, no denying that, but ds is so sweet with his brother & sister, he kisses them constantly and I know they'll be close as they grow up. I love it when he reads dd a book (he's 2.6 now and they're 8 months)! so sweet and all worth it.
I would say that any help you can beg or buy will help a LOT.

Balamorybaby Sat 06-Jun-09 09:48:18

Congratulations smile
My DS2 was 2.5 when my b/g twins were born.
I did invest in a triple, an ABC Everest with the reclining toddler seat and it has been a lifesaver!
I use an Icandy Pear with a buggyboard for shopping etc, but we live by the sea so take them all out for long sleepy walks in the Everest (DS2 still has a daytime sleep) and meant I could walk off some of the excess baby weight at the same time blush.
My DS2 absolutely adores the DT's - they arrived home from hospital with little presents for him and still produce a little gift every now and again to reward him for being such a lovely big bro!
Good Luck, it's a wonderful adventure! My children are 14, 12, 10, 2, and DT's are 4mths, it's hard work, but so rewarding
x

jellibob Wed 10-Jun-09 23:12:51

Congratulations!

We had DS1 (2 years, 2 months) when the DTs were born, very premature at 28 weeks. They were in NICU/SCBU for 3 and 4 months, so we all had a pretty hard time. DS1 was potty trained in intensive care units!

The DTs are now 7.5 months and fab.

Some-one said to me, when we found out that I was expecting twins at 7 weeks (bleeding - this is starting to so sound like Jellibob's tale of woe, but not meant to) "Don't worry, you'll deal with it". That was the best thing that any-one could have said. There is no way that I was going to spend years of my life "just dealing with it", I decided that I was jolly well going to enjoy it. And I am. Wine helps wink.

I find it helps to say loudly to the DTs that it's DS1's time now, to counteract all the times I have to say to him that I'm doing something for the DTs. Also a big fan of routine - the first time that I got all 3 to have a lunchtime sleep at the same time was a moment of great pride and joy. I also ask DS1 if it's ok for the DTs to impinge on his special time, for example, "is it ok for the DTs to listen to your story too?"

We have an icandy pear for the DTs and DS1 walks, unless we're going out for the day all together with DH, and then we take a pushchair for DS1, but mostly use it to carry picnic/flask etc.

I can't imagine having DS1 and just one baby, it seems normal to have DTs.

The other handy thing is that the DTs are endlessly entertained by DS1.

Am I rambling? Perhaps it's the wine...

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