I am at my wits end - how the hell do you bottle feed both twins at the same time

[Ewemoo]

My dts are now a month old and have turned into babies from hell. They are by no means placid and when they wake up they immediately scream for food or just pure frustration who knows?? After many attempts at staggering feeding they still seem to wake up at the same time both screaming. How do you manage warming two bottles and keeping the babies calm? I am sure it's not possible but it is doing my head in at the moment. Also how do you manage this situation in the night when your dh needs to sleep and can't help you?

[missmaypole]

Get them used to drinking room temperature milk - keep the sterilised bottles filled with water and powder in one place, put the scoops in and shake. Sit on sofa one head on each thigh and feed. Burping tricky, but can be done, have to hoik them up with one hand onto shoudler, where muslin has been placed prior to start. DH to sleep in other room/on sofa downstairs, and make sure he takes a turn while you sleep.

[missmaypole]

sorry - to clarify - bottles filled with JUST water. When they wake put in powder as quick as possible, shake and feed. (and SHOULDER not shoudler!)

[cheekysealion]

2nd what miss may has said just keep the bottles on side with water in and add the powder as and when needed

[kayzr]

My friend feeds her twins in their bouncy chairs. She sits on the floor and has one each side. Thats how her MW suggested to her.

[boysgalore]

I fed my twins in bouncy chairs too. Worked well and most time efficient too.

[hunkermunker]

Missmaypole, current guidelines say formula should be made up using water no cooler than 70 degrees as formula's not sterile. You can then add cooled boiled water to make it cooler (or put it in a jug of cold water to cool, or run under the tap), but the initial mix really ought to be done with hot water.

OP, do you have a sling you could use if only one of them's unhappy? Or bouncy chairs?

This "sleep to shrieking hunger" phase isn't permanent, I promise - though it must feel like it right now.

Does DH help at the weekend (or whenever he's not working)? Is there anyone else who could walk them round the block so you could have time to relax without being "on the alert"?

[GreenMonkies]

My friend fed her twins simultaneously, by using her breasts.

It's not too late to relactate.

[hunkermunker]

GM, that's pretty crass, I'm afraid - you have NO idea why the OP's ffing.

[2pt4kids]

FFS GM. NOT helpful

Bouncy chairs is a good idea Ewemoo, or do you have one of those V shaped cushions? You could hold one on your lap and the other on the cushion beside you? or beanbag?

[MintChocAddict]

greenmonkies
OP asked for ideas to help her bottle feed her twins. Don't really understand why you chose to post your helpful link.

Hope some of these suggestions help you Ewemoo. Good luck.

[coxiegirl]

My neighbour had twins, plonked them each on their own bean bag to feed them. Well, maybe not plonked exactly.....
Good luck!

[duckyfuzz]

ewemoo it is very hard, I know I did many of the things suggested here, bouncy chairs, v shaped cushion etc and all were ok, but one of my DTs had a tendency to guzzle if left to her own devices and this led to wind problems...in the end we got reclining high chairs, which I think were only suitable from 4 months, so no good for you yet, but they were a life saver

greenmonkies keep your unhelpful comments to yourself I spent 2 months bfing mine mixed with the odd bottle of formula, one twin better at it than the other, both would feed for an hour and still be hungry so ended up having a bottle anyway, leaving me housebound and stir crazy.Its a decision I'm still not happy with, 5 yrs later and comments like yours just make that worse.

[MrsMattie]

What an inappropriate comment@GM . if you're wish is to promote and normalise breastfeeding, you're doing a really shitty job of it.

My cousin feeds her twins with the V-shaped cushion thingy, too. She finds it very hard work, so you're not alone on that front.

[accessorizequeen]

I think bouncy chairs either side of you is best for your back tbh.
Can you use a bottle insulated carrier or something like that that keeps bottles warm for 4 hours (sometimes more)? Warm them up and put them in there, then get them out as needed ta-da. Again might not work so well at night.

Have you come across podee bottles, I just bought one and am going to try it this weekend (although I'm largely bfeeding my dt's). They're a hands free bottle, they suck on it like a dummy. Might help you out of some situations?
And I would say also that the waking to screaming phase won't last forever either, it IS very stressful! Mine are 16 weeks and it's calmed down a lot.
I know this won't work in the middle of the night, but if you've got some idea when they're going to wake for the next bottle you could wake them for it rather than let them wake. Much much less stressful at this point, you've already got the bottles & bouncy chairs/whatever at the ready. They'll get less wind too if they're calm when feeding.

[PaulaMummyKnowsBest]

I am currently working with my 3rd set of twins and we have used bouncy chairs with them all.

I too go for the "sterilise, add slightly cooled boiled water, leave and add powder when necessary" approach.

Much faster and easier particularly if you have already measured the powder into the right amount.

I know it is very hard at the moment but i promise you, it does get easier.

xxx

[gigglinggoblin]

I used to half fill bottles with boiled water and keep them in the fridge, then top up with boiling water to get the right temp and add powder, then they were the right temp as soon as the kettle boiled. You need to experiment to see how much cold to hot you need for the size of feed. YOu can do several at once and keep them in the fridge that way. Not sure how that sits with hunkers advice, she will know more than me

To bottle feed both at once you could use car seats, or lay them on the sofa with their heads together, feet at each end and sit on the floor in front of them or put them on a mat next to each other with their heads towards you and sit cross legged so they see you upside down iykwim. Depends on the position they like to be fed in, some babies like lying flat and other dont.

[glamourbadger]

Hi Ewemoo - your post has bought back so many memories of the early days with my twins that I had to reply. No idea if any of this will work for you but thought it was worth sharing my experience.

At one month mine still needed feeding 3 hourly. I never managed to bottle feed them at the same time - I tried everything from bouncy chairs, cushions, podee bottles, etc but eventually accepted I would have to feed one and then the other. I would wake one every 3 hours to feed and they got into a good routine, my second twin would start to stir just as the first one was finishing a feed.

Have you tried a dummy? They were a lifesaver for me trying to keep one twin calm while I fed the other. My girls gave them up at around a year with no lasting effects!

As for bottles I made up 3 feeds in advance and kept in the fridge. No idea how this sits with today's advice but it worked for me and we had no problems! I had a bottle warmer in my twins room and heated the bottles there.

Me and my DH took it in shifts through the night. The one off duty would sleep in the spare room with earplugs in. It was terrible to sleep in different beds for months but it really was a lifesaver and what got us through the first stage of twins. DH would take over when he got home from work and I would go straight to bed. He would do the 9:30pm and 12:30 feeds. I would then do the 3:30am and 6:30am. Hard work but meant we each got 5-6 hours sleep.

Oooh - what a rant, it must be the wine! Hang in there, it does get easier in time. Hard to imagine now but you will look back on these initial days and smile, I promise

[Aimsmum]

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[Aimsmum]

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[GreenMonkies]

Jajas, I am not having a laugh, two boobs, two babies, no bottles to wash, sterilize, milk to mix (or warm if you are not following current guidelines on safe formula prep) whilst two babies scream and so on.

This thread goes a long way towards debunking the idea that it is easier to bottle feed twins. Short term, whilst you are in hospital and whilst DH/DP is on paternity leave it might seem like it is, but once you are alone and having to do it by yourself it is the harder option by far. Far, far easier to sit on the sofa with a v-shaped cushion with the babies in rugby ball position with your tits out.

If for some reason you can't breastfeed then I would say cartons of ready made formula and lots of pre-sterilised bottles. (ready made formula is better as it does not have the same non-sterile/contamination issues that powdered formula has) Don't bother to warm it, just feed at room temp, with the babies on your lap on a v-shaped cushion if you can, physical contact is as important as calories, try to avoid feeding them in car seats or bouncy chairs if possible, even at this age they need holding as well as feeding.

[Tortington]

i don't know what thecurrent guidelines are -i used to make the bottles up using boiling water and then put them in the fridge and re-heat in hot water or microwave

i don't know if you can still do that or not?

anyway - the mechanics of bottle feeding

imagine this

you sit in middle of settee

on either side of you is a pillow - by the side of each leg

each baby goes on pillow at each side of leg

so their heads are kind of at your thigh

as you are feeding them, you are close to both of them and you can have eye contact with both

the ergonomics of this dictate that your arm and hand will be curved around the babies face and it makes it easy to hold the botleand stoke the face with a finger IYKWIM

lifes hard enough without people brow beating you about feeding choices

[Tortington]

stroke - no stoking!

[kitstwins]

At night, cartons of ready made formula. YOu could also prop feed, which is tricky to master but saved my sanity in the early days once I'd got the hang of it. I'd practise it during the day so that you don't have to blunder about at night as it takes a few goes to get the hang of it.

I would place the babies in bouncy chairs and then put a cushion/pillow to the side of them. I'd then use an assortment of towels, muslin cloths, anything else to hand to prop the bottles up. I'd hold the bottle to the side of the babies' mouth so that she'd turn her head to the side and take the teat and once she was sucking away I'd basically build a cradle of muslin cloths around it and support this with towels and cushions until it was securely rested. The muslin cloths, towels, cushions, etc. effectively acted as my 'hand', holding the bottle at the right height. I'd then do exactly the same with the other twin who was waiting, boggle-eyed with famished rage with a dummy in her mouth and the two would glug happily away. If they ever had a splutter or a cough, I was sat in front of them so I could just move the bottle away and pick them up, and when they wanted to stop they just turned their head away and the teat plopped out of their mouth. It worked really well.

It took me two or three days of fiddling about with cloths under the guidance of my maternity nurse but once I'd cracked it this actually made life SO much easier. It meant both babies could feed simultaneously and I could wind one of them without disrupting the other twin's feed (which I would have to have done had I been holding the bottles). You CAN'T leave the babies on their own, but it does mean you can sit in front of them and have your hands free to wind them as and when. During the day I'd swap about a bit and feed one in my arms whilst the other prop fed (alternating twins at feeds) but when I was really frazzled and things were tricky (as they often can be in the early days) I'd do them both at the same time. They got heaps of bonding from me at every other moment of the day.

I was taught this trick by my maternity nurse who had learnt it 20 years previously in a moment of desperation (she had twins and a husband who worked night shifts so was on her own with the babies a lot) which neatly sums up how much of twin parenting is about muddling through and doing the best you can, rather than conforming to an 'ideal' that fits to a singleton baby. Necessity is the mother of invention with twins and although it's often not particularly glamourous or orthodox, if it gets you all through the day then it has to be good. As far as I was concerned, all bets were off in terms of conventional methods and if I had to x rather than y to get through the day then so be it. The only people who were going to raise an eyebrow were people with one baby and they weren't living my life.

Prop feeding really changed things for me as it took the stress and panic out of being on my own. I still got to enjoy my babies but without the dread of the next feed. I don't think parents of singletons ever feel the awful panic just prior to a twin feed when you realise you have insufficient hands for the task ahead and have NO idea how you are going to get through the next fifty minutes.

Hope this helps. I taught it to a few other twin mothers I got to know and we all did it on the days we were on our own and it really helped.