Newborn and twin toddlers - where does the newborn sit in the car?

[hattyyellow]

We've just collected a newborn car seat from a friend.

Currently our twin DD's (3 and a bit) both sit in their car seats each one by a window in the back. Back seat seats three so we shoved the newborn seat in the seat between them whilst waiting for our new arrival.

Currently the baby seat is a receptacle for their books, bags, hats and any random rubbish they choose to chuck in it!

I imagine when it's just one adult and the three kids, the baby can go in the front passenger seat as we can disable the airbag.

But when we're all together? If I put DD's car seats next to eachother and baby on one side by the window they end up biffing eachother. If I put baby in between them, I worry it'll end up getting smothered by them!

Tired pregnant brain - what's the logival answer here?

[ohIdoliketobebesidethe]

I would personally keep baby in front and put a parent between in the back. We have toddlers (not twins) and I feel much happier having baby in front so you can check they're OK if crying. We do have multipla though so dh is in front too. My toddlers are constantly giving baby too much "physical affection".

[hattyyellow]

Ah, I hadn't thought of that! Thank you! I've got so used to not being able to climb in between the car seats in the back as my bumps expanded that I hadn't thought of that option!

Love the "too much physical affection" -that's a great way of putting it!

[IWonderIfMamaGStillLovesMe]

I would take out the baby seat so it can not be used as a dumping ground.

I would put the baby either in the middle or behind the driver and not in the front at all.

You can get mirrors so you can view the rear facing baby quite easily to check all is well.

[hattyyellow]

THanks Mamag - I'm not sure what the safety guidelines are on having the baby in the front seat - is it not advised?

[hattyyellow]

Ahhh, Cheers Ruby so even if the front passenger seat airbag is deactivated - it's still safer to put all three kids in the back?

The extra rear view mirrors are a good idea -at least then I can see if one or both toddlers are attempting to feed the baby small chokable objects!

[ilovemyghds]

I have 2 toddlers (not twins) and a baby. I have the oldest toddler in the middle of the back seat, but I do tend to keep the baby in the front if I have no adult passengers. If we are going on a long journey (with DH in car as well) then I put baby in the back, but whoever is not driving is able to turn around and keep a closer eye on goings on in the back.

I have always preferred to keep mine in the front when tiny babies anyway, especially if we set off for somewhere straight after a feed - which is usually the case - as I worry about them being sick and me not noticing.

The two older ones do sometimes squabble, as their seats are always next to each other, regardless of where the baby is. I started sitting them like that quite a few months before baby was born to get them used to it.

[IWonderIfMamaGStillLovesMe]

Just make sure nothing goes in the car that could be a danger.

[Neeerly3]

hatty - we are having same issues! Our current favoured solution is going to be, toddler in front, toddler in back, mummy in middle and baby behind daddy. When I am with all three on my own, baby will be in front and both boys in back.

[Neeerly3]

disclaimer: my car not big enough for all 3 seats in back.....

[hattyyellow]

Thanks all - will start working on the eyes on the back of the head story

Useful tip too to get the girls used to sitting next to eachother if necessary - rather than suddenly adding yet another new and unsettling thing to their life by suddenly switching their seating positions once the baby's arrived!

If the babe is sleeping during a journey, I guess it's less likely to be disturbed by one child accidentally dropping books on it than two?

What about when you get home and babe is sleeping but toddlers not? Would you want to get the baby out first (seated at side by window for easy access) and in and then release the toddlers? Or release the toddlers (seated at sides)and then bring baby in (seated in middle)? Or does it not matter? So much to learn...

Should I be reading the baby books on labour/ actually sorting out nursery that looks like the back sorting room of an Oxfam shop rather than fretting over this?

[throckenholt]

I would try them all in the back - at 3+ your twins should be learning not to biff each other too much, and not to biff the baby either.

Do it now - before the baby comes and then the novelty will have worn off a bit by then - and you will have figured out if you can reach all the clips etc (easier with a 5 point, not so easy when you are trying to get to the normal seatbelt clip).

[sweetkitty]

DD1 (4) sits in middle, DD2 (2.10) sits at out side, baby at the other. Cannot disable airbag so can't put baby in the front. Fighting can happen between older two though

[hattyyellow]

Thanks all, good tips about the safety strategy.

Thinking about it, I imagine if we're going to toddlers etc it would help to have the baby at the side. So that I can lift the baby out in car seat rather than climbing across a toddler and trying to lift out the car seat over them. Or liberating toddler from car and trying to stop them running off whilst taking out baby in car seat.

Goodness me, it's like that old riddle about a man trying to take a fox, a chicken and a bag of corn across the river in a boat where he can't leave combinations of them together..

[Neeerly3]

how u feeling anyway hatty? when u due again?

[sweetkitty]

You quickly get the combination of how to loads/unload them. I hold baby car seat open the door, DD1 goes in first in the middle then DD2, close door, then go round other side put baby in buckle DD1 in, come back round drivers side buckle DD2 in then myself.

We also do the touch the car's lights and do not move at car parks.

[Neeerly3]

my boys are pretty good at playing statues when they are out of the car, so hoping that will follow through when i am having to get baby out too.

I may leave trips out with just me and the three kids for a few months though!

[hattyyellow]

Neerly I'm now 33 weeks (eek!) due on 22 December so bets on for a Christmas Day baby! How are you feeling?

Sweetkitty thank you - will try and remember the order!

Laughing at the statues and touching the car lights - at the moment I take one girl out, take them around to the other side and do the other one while the one on the pavement holds onto my knees.

They now automatically shout "knees, knees" which gets bewildered looks from passers by! I used to always say "hold onto my knee" to the one who was waiting on the pavement.

[hattyyellow]

Sweetkitty am I imagining it or do you have three girls as well? I think new babe will be DD3, any tips on dealing with all the "your poor husband" comments we're getting already!

[sweetkitty]

hatty - I am loving having 3 girls, the big two dote on the baby (a bit too much) DD1 will sit and gently hold her hand in the back of the car, if yours are anything like mine they actually fight over the baby, if she is getting changed theres one at each side of her arguing over which one she is facing, they will also fight to bring me nappies etc

On the "oh your poor husband" comments I look bemused and say "why is he poor, he has 3 gorgeous, healthy daughters"?

DP asked me on Friday how I manage to get the 3 of them out the car and across the car park and in and out of nursery by myself twice every day, I actually am more stressed when he is there messes up my system.

[hattyyellow]

Aww, that's lovely! Your daughters sound adorable. Fingers crossed mine are fighting to bring me nappies and not full of sibling rivalry! I think three girls will be lovely, just feel a little sad for DH not having a son. This will definitely be the last baby!

Very impressed at your car unloading smoothness!

[sweetkitty]

DP will admit to feeling a bit of sadness at the scan at not having a son but he said as soon as she was born that was it he adored her and it never mattered one bit she doesn't have a willy!

[Neeerly3]

if DC3 is a boy, then we need to meet hatty and marry them off - bit expensive for you though eh!

I'm fine, but feel HUGE for 24 weeks - just hoping to make it past Xmas this time!