Just discovered I'm having MCDA(?!?!) twins - now in shock - please help

[mum2william]

Hi everyone

I'm hoping to find some support here. I have a DS who is 14 months, fell pg (bit of a surprise but happy) now have just had dating scan and it's MCDA twins (I don't even know what that means!) DH and I were in complete shock. Didn't get an accurate due date but they spoke about c sections and early induction? At the mo EDD still 8th May.

My head is now spinning with the logistics of dealing with newborn twins and a 21 month old burly boy - how do you cope? What pushchair should I get? was gonna get Phil and Teds, do they do one for twins and a toddler? What about beds/cots, should they go in together? moses basket or straight to cot? Can you fit 3 car seats accross the back of the car? (Should DS go in the front?)Am I going to get any sleep between now and their first birthday?

Please please help, I feel so out of my depth and if I'm really honest a bit resentful, then gulity, then teary when I see the scan pics of these 2 tiny people in me - I'm gonna be the size of a house!!!

[Biggogglyeyes]

ive just googled this and here the answer

MCDA twins = Monochorionic diamniotic - the most common form of identical twins are mono-chorionic (one placenta), di-amniotic (two maniotic sacs). It is very rare to have mono-chorionic, mono-amniotic twins-these are then in the same sac, with no dividing membrane.

congrats

[smellyeli]

Congratulations!!! What amazing news. Just think, what a brilliant family you are going to have. Gosh, you must have so much to think about - but a long time to sort it all out, May is ages away, and I'm sure someone will come on here soon with lots of twins advice - but for now I will just say a big congratulations (and at least you won't have to have the whole shall-we-shan't-we-go-for-a-third discussion)

[fairylights]

hi there - just wanted to say i have a friend who had twins when her ds was 20 months and she is surviving and even coping fine! It is possible.. if a bit tiring!
Try posting over on the multiples threads, they will all make you feel welcome and lots better. all the best

[jabberwocky]

Do a thread sometime for accessorizequeen. She has a ds1 who is 5, ds2 who is 22 months and now twins who are about 2 weeks old! She was quite surprised when she found out she was pg for the third time and more than a little shocked when the scan showed twins but seems to be doing well. There are lots of other moms of multiples as well on MN who can offer you great advice.

Good luck!

[BibiThree]

Hey there,

I have mc/da twins too, although at first we thought they were mc/ma which was really scary! Our girls are now 15 months and we have dd1 who turned 4 last week.

Twins are amazing fun, very hard work, but so, so special.

In answer to your questions, we have the Instep double nipper, which we LOVE!
You can get 3 car seats across the back of some cars, search the archives, there are loads of threads about it, including one that was around earlier this week.
Our girls were 5 weeks early so spent the first 6 weeks sharing a moses basket, but after that they didn't want to share a basket/cot.
You will get sleep but it won't be as much as you had with your first child! There are some small plus points, dd1 never wakes up when the dts are wailing, she learned to switch off very quickly.

I had an em c/s with dd1 and when I found out I was having twins I decided on an elective c/s. The consultant I was under had no intention of inducing early or giving me a section before 39 weeks. As it turned out Twin 1 had IUGR (stopped growing) so I had an elective c/s at 35 weeks. No special care needed although we were in hospital for 2 weeks.

You may well become the size of a house, I was bigger at 34 weeks than I was at full term with dd1. Sorry.

Also, a small note to tuck into the back of your mind for when you're planning your first few trips out of the house with them. You will be stopped by EVERYONE. It will take you 3 times longer to do anything in public. This is wonderful, embrace it and get used to answering the same questions a million times an hour.

All your feelings are perfectly normal at the moment, keep posting on the multiples boards, the ladies here are wonderful!

[travellingcircus]

I didn't have twins but I did have a 14mnth gap and then a 17mnth gap. Sometimes I think it would have been easier to get it all 'out of the way' at once with twins. In no way undermining the difficulties but + points are:
They will be wearing the same size nappies, they will require feeding at the same time with the same food substance (if you can get them into a good routine from the off!) they will then both sleep at similar times (hopeful I know- but does happen). They will play with the same toys, they will attend nursery preschool together and then school together. They will always have someone close who understands them and no one will ever be able to take that away.
You are VERY, VERY lucky. It will also be over before you know it, so enjoy it. HUGE congratulations- I'm sure you will be fine x

[mum2william]

You are all fab and so swift too. I'm beginning to feel better, at least a bit less daunted.

On the buggy front it looks like the Out'n'about nipper 360 is quite popular, is this the same as yours Bibithree? Does anyone else have one?

One other thought I've had is breast feeding - how does that work? both togther? one at a time? I did it for 9 months with DS and would like to do the same for the DT but not if it's a logistical nightmare - happy mummy = happy babies???????

Thanks for the support ladies, I'm sure I'll be about for a while.

[mamadiva]

Congrats on your twins mum2william.

I havent had twins myself but have twin sisters who are only 8 months older than my DS so they are 3.

I was around to help out alot with them at the start as I lived with my mum for a while.

She has an Instep nipper its quite good as long as you dont mind them not facing you it is a dream to push! She is selling hers for £250 I think its been used about 5 times she got it as a holiday buggy about 6 months ago.

The only thing I will say is its a bit of a pain to fold but other than that its great, hers is the red one.

[RobynLou]

re bfing twins i recently met a woman happlily and sucessfully bfing 9m twin girls, she said if you think of the time it would take to prepare all the bottles she believes bfing is easier...
dont know the practicalities though.

[BibiThree]

We love our nipper, dream to push as long as you get the swivel front wheel. Awkward to get int eh boot if you're short of body and arm though, it's wide when folded.

[tkband3]

On my way to bed, but saw your thread and couldn't not post!

Firstly, congratulations . I know only too well the mass of emotions that are going round you at the moment. DD1 was 20 months when my DTs (girls as well) were born (who were actually MC/MA - the rarest kind). I won't lie to you - the first year was challenging , but we are now reaping the benefits of having our children so close together. They are now the best of friends and only this afternoon were telling me how much they all loved each other and how lucky they are to have each other.

I had a nipper, (without the swivel wheel - it didn't matter, it's so light it was easy to manoeuvre (sp?) anyway) and I can't recommend it highly enough. DD1 is quite small for her age and initially, I had the smallest baby in a sling with DD1 and the other baby in the buggy. When DT1 got too big for the sling, DD1 was old enough to walk most places and if she got tired, she would sit on top of the buggy! Although I have to admit I didn't get out much with all 3 on my own for the first few months.

Breastfeeding is do-able - talk to HoochieMomma, who is still b/feeding her 14 mth old DTs (I think that's how old they are ) and Marslady is an expert and has helped lots of mums on here to continue breastfeeding when they might otherwise have given up - I only wish I'd known her when my DTs were born, as I might have managed longer than 5 weeks.

Come and join us on our regular multiples thread for lots of support, advice (and a bit of madness too ). It always starts d'y ever....

Must go to bed now!

[bellabelly]

mum2william, I have some books about twin pregnancy if you are interested? I found them quite helpful when i was expecting my DTs. If you are in London and could collect, they are yours for free! Or yours free for postage if you live elsewhere.

It's good news that yours are di-amniotic, statistically less risky and more straight-forward. The standard thing at my hospital was to induce or do c-sect at 38 weeks but I think this varies and some women go to 40 weeks and have natural labour etc.

You WILL be big as a house, though some mums do sail through pregnancy regardless. If at all possible, think about getting some help (paid or from willing friends and family) in for the later stage of the pregnancy, help with the housework or with looking after your DS.

finally, CONGRATULATIONS!

[Tortington]

congratsxxx

[Suedonim]

Congratulations! My nephew and wife had twins last year, when their other two dc were 2yo and rising 4yo. And they live in a two-bed house. But they manage, with a bit of juggling, and are a delightful family and you will be too, I'm sure.

[BibiThree]

Also, we got most of our doublers (baby bouncers, sterilisers etc) off ebay. bargains to be had there!

Congratualtions by the way, as scary as it seems at the moment, it really is wonderful. Absolutely exhausting some of the time, absolutely brilliant most of the time.

I didn't b/f as the dts were born without sucking reflex and I tried expressing for a weel but they lost so much weight they had to be tube fed and I wasn't producing enough milk with a pump. I was intending to try and knowing how many women on here have managed it, made me more confident about trying.

[mum2william]

tkband3 and everyone, thanks again for your support. Will keep an eye on the mulitples thread and seek advice - will def need it in the early days. I'm secretly hoping for boys as already have boy stuff from DS. DH even mananged a joke about the whole thing - "We'll have enough for a 5-a-side team now" I think that's his way of being supportive!

Bellabelly I'd love the books, but am in Cambridge so would prefer posting - how can we sort that out? I can post you a cheque if you let me know how much it is.

I'm amazed at how much friends and family have come forward with offers of baby stuff and help, much much more than with just one - Hopefully they wont all run for the hills when the time comes. BTW how long do people normally stay in hospital, i'd like natural birth but guess it's down to the bubs and docs. Have NO experience of c/s are you crippled much and for long after?

Big hugs to all you lovely supportive mummies.

[mum2william]

Forgot to say Hoochies and Marslady - will def be in touch about b/f, thanks for the offer. It's helped for a start knowing that it's at all possible!!! Gonna concentrate on the logistics and pg for now, but will hopefully pop up later to ask about b/f

[tkband3]

Good to hear you're feeling better about everything today. I have all girls, so my DH reckons we've got our own girl band in a few years' time .

Just on the subject of the birth - lots of consultants and midwives tend to recommend c-sections for twin births, particularly with id twins, but it's not always necessary. It is perfectly possible to have a natural birth (and Mars, who is a doula, will back me up here I'm sure ). Even though my DTs were mono-amniotic my consultant was quite happy for me to give birth naturally, had I gone into labour spontaneously before 37 weeks. (I had strict instructions to give all those attending the birth if he wasn't there as well .) But with id twins, apparently the placenta starts deteriorating after 37 weeks, so we agreed a date for a c-section if I didn't go into labour - I didn't and so had the CS at 37+4 weeks. I breastfed both babies simultaneously in the recovery suite and didn't find the CS hindered the feeding at all - in fact I had less trouble recovering from the CS than from my 'natural' birth with DD1. It's a bit of a pain that you can't drive for 6 weeks, but to be honest, it's best to hunker down and spend as much time as you can with your babies and sleeping . I stayed in hospital for 4 days.

[bellabelly]

mum2william - let me dig out the books and then I can let you know what there is - if you decide what you want, I will get them weighed at post office and let you know about postage!

I had an elective c-section (which was actually my preference in any case) and as both my twins ended up being breech it was a very easy decision for me. I was lucky and found recovery very easy, although i know that it isn't always that straightforward. At the time I decided to go for c-sect, only one twin was breech and the consultant did say I could choose to try a vaginal delivery but I really didn't want to in any case. Hopefully you'll get some choice about what happens.

[Leoloopydoo]

Mum2william, congratulations ! I remember feeling just like you are now! But you are doing well, when I was pregnant it took me a long time to find anything positive about having twins.
my DTSs were born 3 days before ds1's 2nd birthday, are also mcda twins.

They are 20 months now and real bundles of energy!

will you get sleep ... but get as much as possible now, carrying twins is tiring.

Don't be pressured into c-section or early induction just yet!

Both of mine went together straight into a cot (I don't understand the moses basket thing).

We got around with a double buggy and sling.

If you can find anyone to help you out the first few weeks or months (years if possible ), you will definitely enjoy the first year more, so start planning that now!

[Leoloopydoo]

As for the breastfeeding, I got loads of help from Mars, she gave me the knowledge to know I could do it, the right information to be able to do it and the determination and strength to actually do it. I breastfed both for 15 months (dt1 won't drink any milk and looks a bit skinny so I wish I had stuck at it longer )

I did and could, but wasn't keen on feeding both at the same time but had fast feeders so it was fine to feed one after the other.

[bellabelly]

Hi again - have dug out the books and can offer

Everything You Need To Know to Have a Healthy Twin Pregnancy (by Gila Leiter MD)

A Contented House with Twins (by Gina Ford and Alice Beer)

Double Trouble - Twins and How to Survive Them (by Emma Mahony) I particularly liked this one

Extreme Motherhood - The Triplet Diaries (by Jackie Clune) (more of a fun read than practical advice)

Have a look on amazon or similar and see what you think - if any of them appeal, let me know and I'll find out about postage costs. They are all paperback so shouldn't be too much to post.