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tears and tantrums, and that's just

(4 Posts)
squeezebox Sat 02-Aug-08 10:55:53

I have 14 month twin girls who have always been a bit on the sensitive side but in last few weeks have reached new levels, am miserable and some days I end up with all of us crying!
They have always fought a bit, one tends to boss the other who shrieks blue murder. But lately its awful. Also, they have started to fight over me a lot, both wanting to crawl into my lap and hitting at each other to make the other one get off. One has got so clingy she screams constantly unless I pick her up- a bit late for separation anxiety to suddenly start ?? Or not?
I'm pregnant again, due December, happy about this if somewhat apprehensive- does anyone think they would understand this and feel jealous? Someone said to me they pick up on it but my gut instinct is this isn't the cause...
My bossy girl has also started having full on tantrums with high decibel screams. we went to a singing class outdoors yesterday and I had2 girlies clinging to me and screaming while (it felt like) all singleton mummies sat with happy kiddies playing tambourines..... It's really hard to help a 14 month old in full tantrum mode while my other twin gets upset by the noise, I can't talk to her properly and she gets so worked up she hits out and scratches
Oh and she has tried to bite me a few times, I really want to nip that in the bud, please tell me someone else has had thisI'm feeling desperately bad motherish!
Sorry if am sounding miserable.(sad)

NicMac Sun 03-Aug-08 15:15:44

Sorry that you are having such a rough time. I have five year old twins and a 14 month old singleton. It is hard to give you constructive advice but can you try and remove your 'bossy girl' from the situation so she is not getting all the attention? For example, turn your back to her and lavish attention on the better behaved twin at that point? I am sure you are a wonderful mother, twins at this age can be overwhelming. Is there support from your partner and family? Perhaps you need to look after yourself too as I am sure you are exhausted with the babies and your pregnancy. I really feel for you, all I can say is that it really does get better and this is a phase which will pass. Very best of luck

squeezebox Mon 04-Aug-08 10:01:43

Husband great, but working his socks off, family not local- pondering a mothers help a coupleof afternoons if we can budget for it.
Thank you for support, it all helps! Will try that ignoring thing a bit more- it's just she seems to up the screams when I do, but maybe it'll pass if I stick it out....

NicMac Mon 04-Aug-08 11:51:29

Yes, try and stick it out. I know it is very hard but it does work. Get some help if you can at all finance it. What about the local authority could they not help or give you a place at a creche a couple of mornings to help you breathe a little?

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