Pregnancy 5 months after first baby - pls help!

[stephy33]

Hey lovelies, I was hoping there is someone on here who's in the same situation as us and could give some advice pls? I have a 5 month old baby which took us 5 years to conceive. Yesterday i found out i am pregnant! Its a huge shock as we didn't think it would happen so easily and we only slept together once in all this time! :$
My worry is that the babies are so close in age and its going to be a big struggle for us financially as well as we only have a 2 bed house. Im worried it will affect our first baby and i dont know how i am ganna help our first baby sleep in her cot in her room with a screaming newborn next door. If anyone has experienced the same with pregnancy so soon after giving birth advice would be greatly appreciated as at the moment i dont know if i can keep it or not 😢 xx

[Michmarl]

Hey, I found out I was pregnant when my little one was the same age and then found out it was twins! I was absolutely gobsmacked but all I thought to myself and do now is that we are so’s o lucky, and have been blessed and that’s what gets me through! I’ve spoke to a lot of people who have had twins after the first but I’m yet to meet someone who has had twins so close that the first, my daughter will be one when they arrive (hopefully)

[BecauseReasons]

I know two families with similar age gaps, both happy surprises. The consensus is that's it's really hard at first but is well worth it when they're older as they can play together beautifully and it's easy to find trips and holidays etc that appeal to them both. Also gets the baby stage out of the way in the fewest years.

[puds11]

It’ll be tough, but two children at any age gap is tough really. Also it would work better for them sharing a room from a young age if there’s a small age gap.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

[MadeForThis]

My cousin has a similar age gap. My friend had a surprise pregnancy when her dd was 3 months.

The youngest in both families are over 2 now. The siblings are like best friends. Have the same interests, play together etc.

I'll not lie, the first year is hard but they wouldn't change it for the world.

[Bluerussian]

It is amazing how things like that happen, I've known others who took ages to conceive their first and ended up having three in quick succession.

I can imagine how scary it is for you, most of us wouldn't want such a close age gap but it's happened.

Are you financially comfortable enough to be able to afford some help at home with the children and housework? General 'mother's help' sort of post. Or maybe your mum or mum in law. It would mean you not being completely worn out all the time. My cousin had three children very quickly but had great family support, it's hard to do it alone.

I suggest you sleep in the other bedroom with the new baby while he or she is very small and let your older one - who won't be very old - stay put in your bedroom with your husband asleep there. You'll still have time for 'get togethers' when both children are asleep but we all know the early stages of babyhood often involve sleepless nights.

Once the tiny one is settled you could bring her into your room and later suggest to your eldest that she might like her own room, make it exciting for her but don't force it because little ones are sometimes nervous at night if they wake up and there's no parent present. I realise the chances are you'll end up with both in your room for a while but that won't last forever. They can eventually share a bedroom but I expect you'll be looking for a bigger house at some stage.

These are just ideas, certainly not advice which I would never give. You will work something out. What I wish for you is an easy pregnancy and delivery of a contented child.

It really is wonderful news even if it doesn't seem like it at the moment and I wish you, your husband and Big Sister many congratulations.

[eandz13]

This is a delayed response but I got pregnant with ds2 4 months after dd1. I dreaded how difficult it would be, but they're 3 and 4 now and it's really not been that hard/much of a difference from having just the 1. I was already in the swing of waking up in the night and early mornings, changing bums, making up bottles etc, so it really wasn't a massive shock to the system having to do it for 2. If anything it's more difficult now because they're the best of mates, but argue and scrap like cat and dog and I'm having to referee often. But when they get on and entertain each other it gives me 15 mins to hide in the kitchen knowing they're having fun honestly, it's not too bad at all and lovely seeing them love each other so much.