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2 year old twins becoming difficult!

(114 Posts)
redrhubarb Thu 18-Oct-18 21:20:04

Up until now life with my dtwins had been surprisingly enjoyable. They cooperated with me (most of the time)and were generally well behaved. Now they are 2 1/2 and extremely challenging!

They moan about anything and everything. Today we've had tantrums over:
Getting out of bed
Not having milk on cereal
Having milk on cereal
Having a spotty nappy on instead of striped
Not being able to wear shorts
Having to wear a hat
Having to get In the pushchair
Having to stay in the pushchair
Not wanting to walk
Not getting biscuits from the shop
Having orange juice when wanting black currant
Having to eat dinner
Getting out the bath
Putting wrong pjs on
The list goes on but writing it's just annoying me even more!

Having this all day from both babies is so mentally exhausting.

I was hoping things would be getting easier now but it's so much harder.

Can any twin mums please reassure me this is a short phase that will pass !

Maraki12 Thu 02-May-19 13:55:43

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

RubySlippers77 Tue 22-Jan-19 20:43:24

Hope everyone is doing ok with their multiples..... it's been such a hard day I had to come on here to vent!!

Constant whinging, whining, tantrumming and BLOODY SQUABBLING. So fed up of having to pull them off each other and that they can't be in the same room for more than five minutes without fighting. I have to watch them like a hawk to make sure they're not going to tear each other to pieces; I did ask my HV for advice but all she suggested was 'keep distracting them'. Well yes, that works fine if I can be with them 100% of the time but what do I do when I have to take time to say cook, tidy, go to the loo.....?!

Then at bedtime DP winds them up and winds them up and they get hideously overtired sad takes me ages to then calm them down and get them off to sleep finally.

They still rarely sleep through and I usually wake up by being pushed out of bed when they get in with us!

Just very tired really. And sad - I honestly believed I'd enjoy having DC but at the moment I don't, they're relentlessly hard work and I have very little support. Hooray for preschool, is all I can say.....

RubySlippers77 Wed 09-Jan-19 19:35:13

I so, so hope it gets easier by 4 Wordy, that way I have only a year or so to wait..... at just over 3 mine are horrors sad they are both covered in scratches from where they go for each other, I'm constantly having to separate them. Today has been scratching, hitting, biting and even though we do punishments every time, it's completely draining and I'm exhausted. We never, ever have a chilled day where they play nicely with toys/ each other.

They are currently playing up rather than going to bed even though I know they're absolutely exhausted. I'm avoiding them for a bit and letting DP deal with it!

Wordy15 Tue 08-Jan-19 20:11:08

At nearly 4 it does get a hell of a lot easier.
Esp getting out and about on my own with them. We too are all better out of the house together.

Wordy15 Tue 08-Jan-19 20:04:16

2 non-ID boys nearly 4.
Most of the time they're my gentle little scamps but after 3 passport photoshoots, 2 coldsores on my face and my period plus endless moaning about everything being the wrong thing/place/activity....I need wine!

Picked the wrong time to do dry Jan...

m0therofdragons Mon 24-Dec-18 00:24:57

Age 2-3 was the hardest and tested me to my absolute limit. My twins are 7 now and much easier but still challenging.

Faith7777 Sun 23-Dec-18 17:42:35

Admittedly, I had a good giggle when I first read your post. Reminded me of my life a year ago. My two are almost 3.5. It gets better. Promise. They're trying to assert their independence, find their voice etc whilst having to compete with the same level of attention with another sibling. Lots of walks and playgroups kept them occupied with not enough time to look for things to complain about.

It gets better. Hang in there xxx

RubySlippers77 Wed 07-Nov-18 15:26:30

it is much needed!!

Took them for a walk. It poured down, DTS1 did an enormous poo, came home.

Tried various things to distract them/ stop the squabbling - tidied toyroom, pointed out toys they hadn't played with for ages, put TV on - they still squabbled. Put toys on opposite sides of room; within 20 seconds they're back biting and scratching at each other.

Took them to the supermarket - they argued over which trolley to get. And then squabbled on the way round.

DP supposed to be home by now so I can take DTS2 to the doctors WITHOUT DTS1 but he's still faffing around at work.

wine wine wine for me tonight. And thankfully preschool tomorrow grin

coffeeneeded Wed 07-Nov-18 13:23:56

Oh man. all the gin for you.

RubySlippers77 Wed 07-Nov-18 10:35:27

The DTs have squabbled relentlessly all morning. DTS1 has whined and howled. DTS2 has been bitten by the cat. Could you send some gin my way coffee?!

RubySlippers77 Tue 06-Nov-18 22:21:53

Oh I know, I was so pleased when they offered!! From next term they will be going 4 mornings a week and perhaps my house will FINALLY be clean after 3 and a bit years!

That's my thinking too about the errands - it's a shame because they're at the stage now where taking one of them would be manageable (not going as far as fun!) but two..... <shudder>

coffeeneeded Tue 06-Nov-18 20:14:54

We have to wait until they are three for pre school. 😩😩 I have 6 more months to go. You're very very lucky!!

FWIW I would never take them on errands- it's just not worth it. Go to the park instead.

RubySlippers77 Tue 06-Nov-18 20:07:38

I thought my DTs wouldn't go to preschool till 2.5 either coffee but as it happened the preschool had places early, and offered to take them at just over 2. As you can imagine, I almost bit their hand off!!

DTs were going to go to the GPs tomorrow, but they've bailed on me sad and I have errands I have to run..... deciding whether to postpone and try to do them in a mad rush during preschool later this week, or take the terrible two along and no doubt end up as Shouty Mummy before very long confused

coffeeneeded Tue 06-Nov-18 17:19:14

Thankfully my DM could come and help this avo. Thanks for the gin.

I can't wait for the preschool days. These have been a LOOOOOONG two and a half years.

RubySlippers77 Tue 06-Nov-18 15:07:34

Sending gin coffee! I've definitely been there...!

There's just no let up with mine at the moment; even when I think ah, they're tired out and will watch TV and chill for a bit, they'll STILL find the energy to squabble...

Is there anyone who can take your DC for a bit to give you some recovery time? And boo to your DH having to be more ill than you - mine does it with illness, tiredness etc!

coffeeneeded Tue 06-Nov-18 14:41:55


I'm not very well- DH is also unwell (worse of course) and my DT's are being extremely hard going. We've had biting, hitting, throwing and, worst of all, no nap today.

I need gin

RubySlippers77 Tue 06-Nov-18 10:34:37

How is everyone's week going? My DTs are back at preschool and I am revelling in the simple joy of being able to make a phone call without being interrupted every five seconds grin

RubySlippers77 Sun 04-Nov-18 10:01:32

Ah I feel for you red, mine went through a buggy hating phase too, although they are currently appreciating its warmth! Could you try a twin trike, mine love theirs? Or get a cheapo single buggy, pop one in and encourage the other one to race you?! Mine will do that, admittedly for short periods, but gets you out of the house smile

DP being an absolute arse this morning. Hard as it is to manage two toddlers, it's even harder when he's acting like an overgrown, sulky toddler himself...

namechange9681 Sat 03-Nov-18 13:04:03

@redrhubarb OH GOD! Sounds like my 2 year old ! Some days she's moans ALL day and then even in bed for 10 mins before she falls asleep 😂

redrhubarb Sat 03-Nov-18 12:40:07

Ordinarygirl we've had a good few days where the twins have been behaving. This morning though, they decided to fight again and they refused to go out in the pushchair.

Oh well at least they gave me a break for a few days.

RubySlippers77 Sat 03-Nov-18 11:04:55

Did you get some sleep Ordinary?

I'm paying for my easy afternoon yesterday... today it feels like a marathon just to leave the house 🤦‍♀️

OrdinaryGirl Fri 02-Nov-18 22:50:14

Redrhubarb how're you bearing up?

OrdinaryGirl Fri 02-Nov-18 22:49:16

Yay Ruby! Delighted to see you got a lovely slice of cake peace and quiet! Do hope was restorative.

At the risk of angering the gods of sleep, all is quiet here. I reckon I can get a whopping 5.5 hours sleep in before DTS1 wakes for the day with his horrible hacking cough wailing 'Mummy cuddle! Daddy cuddle. Muuuummeeeeee cuuuudddddle!'



RubySlippers77 Fri 02-Nov-18 18:04:23

Ordinary I'm very tired of running too! The word which crops up most when reading about the twin toddler years is relentless and that's exactly how I'd describe it. Might be different if you have amazingly supportive partner and/ or family, but sadly I don't.

Having said that, My DTs went to MIL & FIL for the afternoon today as I had to go to a meeting about DTS1's speech therapy and couldn't take them. The meeting itself was fine - apart from a few questions which I was supposed to answer intelligently, and nowadays I'm not knowledgeable about anything except the members of Paw Patrol - and happily it finished a bit early, so I went for coffee and cake in peace - it was AMAZING grin

It also meant I had a few hours of no-one shouting "Where ARE you Mummy?", "Come and watch me on the potty" or general background squabbling noises. I left them with the grandparents and pretty much skipped out of the door in anticipation of my treat!

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Thu 01-Nov-18 21:25:31

That was intense to read, ordinary! Mostly because that description is spot on. My ds is going to be 4 soon and I can see a difference already, he even helps with the twins a little bit, and he adores them. But yes ruby the squabbling! It was really bad for me too today. Wasn’t going to have wine but had a glass.... to be honest we didn’t do much! Play doh, painting in those magic colouring books, playmobil and sylvanians (bit young for them being 2 but they like them more than more babyish toys.) really not much else!

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