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2 year old twins becoming difficult!

(114 Posts)
redrhubarb Thu 18-Oct-18 21:20:04

Up until now life with my dtwins had been surprisingly enjoyable. They cooperated with me (most of the time)and were generally well behaved. Now they are 2 1/2 and extremely challenging!

They moan about anything and everything. Today we've had tantrums over:
Getting out of bed
Not having milk on cereal
Having milk on cereal
Having a spotty nappy on instead of striped
Not being able to wear shorts
Having to wear a hat
Having to get In the pushchair
Having to stay in the pushchair
Not wanting to walk
Not getting biscuits from the shop
Having orange juice when wanting black currant
Having to eat dinner
Getting out the bath
Putting wrong pjs on
The list goes on but writing it's just annoying me even more!

Having this all day from both babies is so mentally exhausting.

I was hoping things would be getting easier now but it's so much harder.

Can any twin mums please reassure me this is a short phase that will pass !

Strawberrytraveller Fri 26-Oct-18 06:56:30

Reins - those little backpacks with lease are good.

Otherwise giving them more choices now can help if possible. only give them the choices you want them to have anyway, so not 'what tshirt do you want', but pick two and ask' this one or this one'.

The park is great in winter on a cold day. hardly anyone else goes! so wrap everyone up and might be a good chance to let them run with less people about. For next summer, if you have a garden, maybe ask for garden toys for xmas from people and then you can invite friends over with children and they can play in the garden a bit more contained.

mammmamia Fri 26-Oct-18 08:29:18

We had the Little Life reins with backpacks. I thought they were great. If only because when the kids put the integral hoods on they look absolutely hilarious grin

coffeeneeded Fri 26-Oct-18 09:16:39

I bought reigns and have had some success. But now my twins are older they refuse point blank to wear them- so I carry them as a threat. "If you don't listen to me when we're walking I'll put the reigns on". Seems to work.

I did have some very annoying moments with the reigns though- if one of them runs and the other doesn't you're scuppered!

RubySlippers77 Sun 28-Oct-18 10:29:01

Ahhh I was hoping mine would grow out of the 'talking constantly and loudly to be heard over the other one' phase, mammmamia!!

We started off with these reins (when the DTs were very small and crawling but not walking): then moved to the backpack ones. Now they will often wear the backpacks to store their 'treasures' but want the rein bit off, unfortunately. I second the hoodies idea, not just for finding them but also because the hoods are handy to grab on to when they start to run.....!

Sharp mine don't nap during the day now either sad it was a tragic day when they stopped needing a sleep but they weren't going to bed until very late, it felt like a choice between a daytime break and a loooong evening, or struggling through a day but then at least having a couple of hours to myself in the evening! although it never works like that as there's so much tidying up to do

Half term for us this week coming and I've resigned myself to the house being a bit of a tip; I do the urgent bits but never get half an hour to myself to clean the bathroom out, for example. I tend to do my cleaning when they're at preschool and have no idea how people get it done if they're at work then, along with all the other stuff I have to get done in my small amount of child free time! And Sharp I don't think I have the mental capacity to cope with work at the moment either, the idea of being given an important task to do when I might only have had a few hours' broken sleep is really scary.....

RubySlippers77 Mon 29-Oct-18 09:20:59

Day 1 of half term for us. The DTs were up before 6am (of course, when we have nothing to get up for) and are already bored and squabbling. Shouty Mum (me!) has made an appearance as they were tearing chunks out of each other whilst I tried to sort out the washing. How early is too early for gin?!

mammmamia Mon 29-Oct-18 09:45:10

How old are they ruby?
I do find having a bit of a plan for the day helps.
Can you get them out to the park now, preferably one that has a coffee shop where you can get a brew? grin
Followed by a simple craft activity or play doh while you get lunch ready.
Then some TV time.
Then local soft play or similar?

I don’t know, mine were and are so full of beans I always had to have a few things planned to get through the day!

coffeeneeded Mon 29-Oct-18 10:54:09

We've already been to a music class where my boy twin kept trying to escape- he then got home and wee'd all over the floor.

Morning all! Happy Monday. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Mon 29-Oct-18 11:06:53

Urgh I’m with you all. Half term fun with three under 4 here (preschool half term, second week!). Lots of squabbling and even a bit of biting! Fun times. No way of leaving the house except for play dates, I find myself furiously texting everyone I’ve ever met inviting myself over.... grin

feesh Mon 29-Oct-18 12:26:11

Hi folks. I’ve got twins and a younger Singleton. I just wanted to say that with twins, it DOES get easier. When mine (b/g) were 3 they suddenly started to play together all the time, and actually my life became easier than it did for my friends with only one (who needed constant attention and entertainment).

Also, I’ve since had a singleton and I cannot believe the difference only having one makes. It is a hundred miles from having twins. Please make sure you surround yourselves with fellow twin mums and don’t compare yourself to Singleton mums. Everything about having a Singleton is so different - the bond, the patience, the activities, the cuddles...everything. Twins really takes it out of you, don’t beat yourselves up about anything

RubySlippers77 Mon 29-Oct-18 13:47:18

Mine are just three now mammmamia and have just collapsed onto the sofa. A pre 6am start was too much even for them!! DTS2 wouldn't even eat his lunch, he was so tired. DTS1 has fallen asleep clutching a prawn cracker.....

We did the park first thing (but it was very chilly!) then an art class, which they enjoyed for about twenty minutes before they decided that what they really wanted to do was squabble again sad

That's interesting feesh and thank you for the encouragement! I think people with just one child - or even two of different ages - can't comprehend how hard twins can be to manage. We are potty training at the moment and it's a whole new level of difficulty compared to only having one child to look after! I always thought I'd like three DC, maybe wait till my DTs were 4 or 5 before having another, but I'm not sure I could have any more children without going even more loopy hmm

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Mon 29-Oct-18 16:46:00

But ruby, you’ll be such an expert and so used to the crazy that having a third won’t seem so hard. I do think having three is annoying in other ways though- finding a car fitting 3 car seats, being outnumbered, always having one in a bad mood even if the other two are happy!

Looking forward to an easier time like you described, feesh

mammmamia Mon 29-Oct-18 21:22:28

Everything feesh says is true!

sharpcattle, that’s so funny I used to do that. Arrange play dates with total randoms just to get out of the house. I once invited myself over to DH’s cousin’s house for lunch and she had two teenagers at home not even young children, and I didn’t even know her that well. I don’t know what I was thinking!

RubySlippers77 Mon 29-Oct-18 22:01:34

Haaaa thanks Sharp, not sure I could cope with even more of the crazy!! Honestly my health has been so bad this year (not disability level - but constant aches, pains, bugs etc) that I couldn't consider having another DC until I feel back to somewhere near my best. Sometimes I feel sorry for my DTs as I get so fed up and shouty - maybe I should make 'more patience' my New Year's Resolution?!

Ho hum, weather forecast for tomorrow is still very chilly. I think my DTs will be bundled up and out of the house before they can start bouncing off the walls with impatience!

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Tue 30-Oct-18 06:02:22

mammma I love that, I did have a day the other day where I went through my entire phone and ended up at my next door neighbours just to get out!

Ah ruby I’ve been dreading the cold as our garden is our other ‘room’. Yesterday the girls looked a bit miserable in it and kept muttering ‘wet!’ I know what you mean about that awful relentless barrage of bugs, feeling run down, tiredness. Look after yourself as best you can....get the flu jab!

RubySlippers77 Tue 30-Oct-18 09:04:05

It's so hard sharp, I've had the jab and the boys have had their sprays, but I had it last year too and still came down with the worst flu I've ever had! Fingers crossed for this year..... it's a vicious circle, I feel crap and have no energy so end up eating rubbish, which of course means I'm more likely to get another bug sad

This morning my DTs noticed a toy kitchen we bought for them about 18 months ago that they've never played with - it's been there all the time, they've just ignored it. Within a few minutes there were shrieks and screeches because they both wanted to play with it. That exact minute. Sigh.....

No excitement planned today other than a couple of trips to the park timed round my online food shop delivery. Still cold here but they will be wrapped up and out of the door sharpish to avoid further arguments!

RubySlippers77 Tue 30-Oct-18 14:40:41

I wonder if there is such thing as a child walker? Someone I could use like a dog walker so they can entertain the DC whilst I drink tea and watch trashy TV clean and tidy the house. Extra ££ if they wrestle the DC into their winter layers beforehand too. And even more £££ if they bring them back tired out and ready for bed at 4pm!

April241 Tue 30-Oct-18 14:45:24

Haven’t RTFT but I have 2 year old twins so I’m here to say I’m in the exact same position!

I’m at my absolute wits end so here in solidarity.

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Tue 30-Oct-18 15:43:17

red I think you started this thread at a time when we all needed to vent! Maybe we need to start another support thread or something!

So april how is your week going? Is it harder than usual or is it that delightful build up of relentlessness that makes you marvel you managed another day?!

It’s funny isn’t it about toys. I was about to throw a load away as they had ignored them but they discovered the box ready for the charity shop- ransacked it and stole one item they fought over like your kitchen toy ruby

coffeeneeded Tue 30-Oct-18 16:14:18

My two have just spent 30 mins throwing two balloons about the house. Cheapest fun ever!

A tip for you all though.

Jaffa cakes or mcvities thins are vital- you can stuff the entire thing in your mouth while the kids aren't looking and they'll never know a thing.

@RubySlippers77 that twin walking service sounds like a brilliant idea!!

April241 Tue 30-Oct-18 16:17:55

sharp definitely a more difficult week, I worked nightshift over the weekend and didn’t sleep very well even on my day off. I’m back on nightshift tonight and about had a meltdown today so my OH worked from home which let me go back to bed. Finish nights on Friday morning and back onto days on Monday, shift work is absolutely killing me!

coffeeneeded Tue 30-Oct-18 16:51:55

One of their balloons just burst. 😱😩🤦🏼‍♀️

Sharpcattlegridheavyhat Tue 30-Oct-18 17:04:11

That sounds so hard, april- do you mean you finish nights temporarily or completely? Because that’s too much with twins!

Sometimes I get irrationally angry when friends casually say they’re spending the afternoon reading or sorting their wardrobes or something...

RubySlippers77 Tue 30-Oct-18 22:47:27

April night shifts must be really tough - and swapping between the two must be incredibly hard! Glad to hear that your OH was supportive though smile are your DTs hard work as well?

Would Viscounts work too Coffee?! I've got some in my latest shopping delivery and I fully intend to snaffle the lot before the DTs get their little paws on them grin

I don't even remember how/ why I was so busy pre-DC, sharp apart from having a social life - I've just spent three hours cleaning, tidying, sorting etc once the DTs went to bed - and to think some people might sit down and enjoy a quiet evening watching TV.....

redrhubarb Wed 31-Oct-18 07:25:30

April that would be too much for me working nights! Glad it's almost finished for you.

Is anyone taking their dtwins trick or treating today?

RubySlippers77 Wed 31-Oct-18 08:29:00

Not us red, we don't have many neighbours near us who do it, not worth the effort yet! Maybe in a year or two if they would like to...

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