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"The Twins"

(8 Posts)
Sallyhasleftthebuilding Fri 08-Jan-16 23:54:03

Ahh drives me mad!!! Do you ever correct people with "actually it's Janet and John"?
Why is this still acceptable, I find it really rude! Should I resort to how's your singleton?

Joopy Sat 09-Jan-16 00:20:16

If people have more than one child they ask 'how are the kids?' My sister has 4 kids including twins, she doesn't expect me to name them every time I ask after them......

HeffalumpTrap Sat 09-Jan-16 00:36:27

I regularly enquire after my friend's litter. It's affectionate and not meant to be rude. I don't see how asking about the twins is any worse than asking about 'the kids' or 'your boys' etc.

MyNewBearTotoro Sat 09-Jan-16 00:57:32

I think it's normal when people have multiple children to refer to them as a mass - whether the siblings are twins or not. A group of 2+ children who aren't twins will become they boys/ girls/ kids instead. If you are the only one of your friends with more than one child I can see why it is frustrating for your two to always be 'the twins' and not be mentioned by name but as soon as those friends have a second child it will be the same. When I had DD people always asked "How's Elodie?" Now I have DS as well it's "How are the kids?"

That said I can also see in some situations it must become frustrating if they are always just 'the twins' even when other children are being recognised as individuals. If a friend says "We'll invite Harry, Lily, George, Chloe, Charlie, Millie and the twins" or a teacher says, "Ella, Oliver, Thomas, Harvey and the twins go and line-up" then I can see why you're annoyed.

BuffyFan Sun 10-Jan-16 09:10:11

It's difficult because they each need to be allowed their own identity, and calling them "the twins" undermines this in a way that I don't think is the case when you say "the kids" or similar. I'd leave other people to it, but always make sure you don't call them the twins, use their names. Most people will pick up on it over time.

Starbores Tue 12-Jan-16 09:45:09

I see it the same as when people say the boys, the girls, the kids etc. doesn't bother me although it's not a term I use myself. I think you're reading too much into it tbh.

Stillunexpected Tue 12-Jan-16 09:56:09

It wouldn't bother me at all. I have two DC of the same sex and people ask how the kids (both taller than me now!) are all the time. I respond along the lines of - A is in 6th form, learning to drive etc and B is still day dreaming his way through life but enjoying making music and his horse riding. I wouldn't particularly expect people to ask about them separately.

Minisoksmakehardwork Tue 12-Jan-16 15:57:20

It doesn't bother me. I've two girls and two boys. If we want both of either we call them 'girls' or 'boys'. My twins are boy/girl and I like them being called 'the twins' as its a reminder that they are. As opposed to twins of the same sex which generally look similar even if not identical. Unless you know mine are twins there's no way most people would leap to that assumption. So calling them 'the twins' reminds them of their twin identity in the same way that their names give their individual identity.

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