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When did your twins stop getting so much attention?

25 replies

Pointytoes · 21/10/2015 10:06

I'm at the end of my tether with not being able to step out the house without people stopping me with the pram. I understand they want to admire them and are fascinated by twins, but I'm quite a private person with people I don't know well and it's got to the point I almost dread going out with the babies. It doesn't help that DS is a terrible screamer in the pram so it attracts even more attention than the huge double buggy would normally!

I know some people enjoy the attention and it makes them feel special, but because the conversation usually turns to very personal questions (are they natural, what birth did I have, I must have been massive - I'm very petite and I'm very self-conscious about my postnatal body, so I don't really like being reminded) or innocuous things that I don't really want to discuss, usually if my husband helps a lot but I've been a single parent since birth. I've had a few comments such as "how could he leave such adorable twins, maybe you'll get back together" or "the kids are better off without him!" and I know they mean well but I don't want to discuss it, nor do I feel rude enough to cut them off!

So I'm wondering - at what point did your twins stop being mini-celebrities? My neighbour told me the other day that they are famous in this small town we've moved to and they are talked about all the time and everyone says how do I cope! I'd like to know at some point things will return to normal(ish!)

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BearFeet · 21/10/2015 11:15

Maybe 1ish. I think tiny babies laying flat, it's quite obvious they're twins but once they're sitting in the buggy facing forward it's not as obvious. One might be a bit bigger.

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Alwaysfrank · 21/10/2015 19:37

I can't honestly remember I'm afraid - I think it took a while. But thought I would share this picture if you haven't already seen it- it made me smile

When did your twins stop getting so much attention?
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Pointytoes · 22/10/2015 09:11

Haha, that's great! I've been asked all those questions :)
They are 14 months now, although they still look very small due to their prematurity. They are a boy and a girl and look very different, so this creates even more interest as they don't look like the concept of "twins" - but they are almost exactly the same size, perhaps 4oz between them, so it's pretty obvious they are twins.
I appreciate the laugh! :)

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Mumoftwoyoungkids · 22/10/2015 09:16

It hasn't stopped yet for dh's cousins. They are 28! Admittedly that may be because they are dead ringers for the Sweet Valley High twins. But prettier. Grin

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Pointytoes · 22/10/2015 13:50

I see.. doesn't bode well then haha!!

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lamprey42 · 22/10/2015 14:02

I think after 1 we stopped getting so many comments. Mine are boy girl too. The girl is taller and people sometimes think I have just siblings who are very close in age. It drove me mad though - I didn't mind the talking so much but I had several people touching them without my permission (bearing in mid they were preemies and I was trying to avoid infection). For some reason people do feel able to ask really personal questions (there was a thread somewhere on ones to ask back!) or just daft ones - 'are they identical?', 'no they are boy-girl', 'but are they identical?'. I suppose it is nice in a way that people are interested but in the sleep-deprived early twin days it was a bit wearing. I could avoid interrogation sometimes if I wore one in a sling and had one in a trolley or pram (people didn't spot the one in sling often).

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caravanista13 · 22/10/2015 14:10

I think once they got past the 12/18 month stage it got better. It used to drive me mad to be told by complete strangers that they'd 'always wanted twins' - usually when they'd both been screaming and I'd only left the house for the sake of my sanity. I was often tempted to smile sweetly and say 'take them, they're all yours'! On the plus side, they're in their mid thirties now and have been an absolute joy.

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Boredofthinkingofnewnames · 25/10/2015 07:58

It stopped for a while for me when they were about 2, but then they started to insist on wearing the same clothes and they're ID when they were about 3 and it ramped up again. They've just started school and the only other set of twins left in the summer so they are the only ones there. They are literally like mini celebrities.

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Alwaysfrank · 25/10/2015 08:53

Mine are ID too and so recognisable as a pair - the mini celebrity thing is one of the reasons why we have just sent them to different secondary schools

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neversleepagain · 25/10/2015 10:47

Mine got loads of attention as babies. Almost everyone we passed wanted a look, asked questions, made a comment. Around 2 they got less attention and now at 3 people seem surprised and delighted when they realise they are twins and I have been getting a lot of "you are so lucky" and "they are gorgeous" which I think is lovely. At toddler groups people always ask questions about them and what it's like having twins. I have completely different non id girls, a curly top blonde and a poker straight haired brunette. They are exactly the same size though.

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Cadenza1818 · 26/10/2015 19:56

I think it phased out about pre school age. I also hated it. Know what though? I kinda miss it! I also now do the annoying thing I hated of going 'aw, twins. I've got twins'. It'll pass soon enough don't worry.
Alwaysfrank - I joked of doing this but love the fact it's actually been done!

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ElizabethG81 · 26/10/2015 20:02

It's eased off now that mine are 3 - they're boy/girl twins and one is now a bit taller than the other, so it doesn't seem as obvious to others that they are twins.

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MabelBee · 26/10/2015 20:04

Probably around 2. I really miss it now, the attention.

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Tftpoo · 01/11/2015 16:15

Mine are nearly two but we get it still a lot, maybe because they are identical and obviously twins (although I don't dress them the same). People seem to come out with the rudest things - the worst was a lady at the market who asked if they were twins, I said yes, and she said, pointing at one of them "oh, he's much cuter than his brother". In a rare moment of mental clarity I responded, "well, they're identical twins so they're either equally cute or equally ugly, depending on your point of view". She didn't really know how to respond to that and walked off. I felt quite rude but then she had just been hugely rude about my PFB twins!

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AlpacaLypse · 01/11/2015 16:21

Like everyone else, it tailed off when they were no longer in the buggy all the time.

My usual answer to 'What's it like to have twins?' was 'What's it like to only have one at a time?' btw.

I did consider making a sign like the one in the photograph. Especially after dtd1's hair and eyes went definitely brown while her sister was definitely blonde and grey/green eyes.

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BackforGood · 01/11/2015 16:50

If it helps to look on the bright side, then at least you get less attention that you would if you'd had triplets - now that is impossible to go anywhere without people commenting, and that goes on throughout adulthood too Wink

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Shineyshoes10 · 01/11/2015 17:16

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Sallyhasleftthebuilding · 01/11/2015 17:27

I think about two when they went off in different directions.
I was once asked if she was the evil one? ... she was two weeks old!

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Iliketeaagain · 01/11/2015 17:42

Ha - I still get asked questions when people find out I'm a twin and I'm in my 30s!! But the questions are just different - are you identical, do you dress the same, do you do the same job etc etc plus the joke about there being 2 of me!!

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BlueBananas · 01/11/2015 17:49

My DC are 6&4 so obviously they're not twins but are exactly the same size, height and weight so I get stopped to ask if they're twins all the time!
Very annoying that they're not and I still get this, then the conversation is even longer because people are so surprised that there's such an he difference!

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BlueBananas · 01/11/2015 17:50

Age difference*

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zzzzz · 01/11/2015 17:55

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lljkk · 01/11/2015 18:01

My dad & twin are in their 70s & still can turn heads (still a lot alike).

We were swimming yesterday where there were a lot of apparent clones about.

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FlysInDreams · 01/11/2015 18:55

Less now that they are 16 months, but we still get it. Also, they are both blonde (though different shades) and blue-eyed, so people think they're identical.

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Redcrayons · 01/11/2015 19:00

Once they are out of the pram mostly.
Though if you tell anyone they're twins, you'll still get the same questions.

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