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Pregnant with twins

(21 Posts)
Bonbonbonbon Thu 16-Oct-14 18:50:00

I am 8 weeks pregnant and just found out it's twins! I already have a 20 month old dd so we already have plenty of clothes and toys but now we have to buy a new car and move house to accomodate the twins. I'm kind of crapping myself!

I'm not sure what advice I'm looking for, maybe some of you have gone through similar scenario and can tell me how moving house in the snow with a two year old while pregnant is going to be absolutely fine. And console me that we are going to find an amazing deal on a minivan!

Bonbonbonbon Thu 16-Oct-14 18:53:41

Oh I forgot to mention we haven't any family nearby. His parents are a 10 hour flight and mine are a 6 hour flight away.

We're not telling anyone about the pregnancy until 12 weeks so I'm kind of freaking out holding in this big secret and of course am also exhausted.

neversleepagain Fri 17-Oct-14 13:28:37

Congratulations!

No advice on moving but good luck! Keep in mind that you will get big quickly so try and get the move out the way sooner rather than later.

My parents live abroad too, dh and I havent had one night out together since our twins were 3 months old nor have I had one day away from them. It is hard but you will manage you have no choice

Good luck! Mine are 24 months now.

Bonbonbonbon Fri 17-Oct-14 21:33:50

Good to know you did it and survived! We've decided to wait on moving as we're in a 2 bed and can have the twins in with us for the first six months. Hoping my DH can find a good job near my family and we could wait to move then. The big thing is gonna be the car, I guess.

SugarPlumpFairy3 Sat 18-Oct-14 14:18:14

Congratulations!

It's so overwhelming isn't it? It sounds like you're making plans which is great. A move nearer family will be invaluable. I don't know where we'd be without the family support we have.

We moved when I was 23 weeks pg with our twins and our dd was 5. We did a part exchange on a new build which reduced the stress immeasurably. The builders bought our old house from us so we didn't have the stress of selling or being in a chain. It only took 4 weeks to complete which was rather intense but it was over and done with very quickly. My duties on moving day were confined to tea making only smile.

We also had to buy a new car (twins are flipping expensive!) and went for the S Max and we absolutely love it.

Bonbonbonbon Sun 19-Oct-14 02:07:00

thabks for posting. How did your dad react when the twins came?

Bonbonbonbon Sun 19-Oct-14 04:30:39

Argh stupid autocorrect! Your dd not your dad!

SugarPlumpFairy3 Sun 19-Oct-14 19:33:07

She was thrilled and proud, then underwhelmed (I think she thought the would come out walking, talking and ready to play!), then did lots of attention seeking hmm. She especially loves them now they're more interesting (they've just turned 2) but I think it's been quite hard on her tbh.

She's aware of the attention they get from others because of them being twins and the sheer amount of attention they've required from us has been difficult at times for her. We have to make sure we factor in plenty of 1:1 time with her. You may not have any issues with your dd as she is much younger and probably won't ever remember having to share you smile.

Oh and my dad was thrilled too wink.

slightlyinsane Mon 20-Oct-14 01:07:34

congrats on your twins! They are hard work but amazing at the same time.
Carrying twins is tough on a body and I wouldn't have liked to have moved while pregnant, I did it whilst preg with a singleton and that was just about as much as I could handle.
8 wks is still early days yet and you maybe lucky but after having 3 easy healthy pregnancies I was not prepared for how different I felt with the twins, I had horrific ms and completely drained until about 20 ish wks then I was just drained. your body will go through all the changes it did before but a dam sight quicker. Its so much fun hmm
Do you know what type of twins you are having??
My id girls are 21 wks now

Bonbonbonbon Mon 20-Oct-14 19:37:37

Thanks for the replies, it's so great to hear other peoples' experiences.

I am eight weeks along and we have an US this week. They can do a blood test now at ten weeks to find out the sex, but it might not be as accurate with two.

I was suspicious that it was twins, because I felt pregnant at 3dpo and tested BFP at 5dpo. I have also had much worse MS this time, no vomiting but I feel queasy all the time and have gone off a lot of foods. Or I crave a food at one meal and find it repulsive hours later. And I am super tired of course.

Weirdly enough, lots of my friends have recently given birth to their second children so we've been having lots of play dates to occupy their toddlers. It's a relief to occupy my dd that way without having to ask. I haven't told anyone yet.

slightlyinsane Tue 21-Oct-14 01:05:05

Just 're read that you're going to keep it quiet until 12 wks, I did that but as it turns out everyone had guessed, thought I'd done so well at hiding it.
Strangely enough my pregnancy test was the faintest of all I've ever done hmm
What's the blood test you can have, I've never heard of that to find out the sex. I take it you've already had a scan could they tell you what type of twins you're having??

Bonbonbonbon Tue 21-Oct-14 13:11:15

Slightly, I think the test is fairly new and isn't offered in the UK yet. We're in the States. Like my friends with 1 year olds haven't heard of it, that new. They can also test for some chromosomal abnormalities at the same time and it's very accurate with singletons. Apparently there is fetal DNA floating around in your bloodstream.

I had a brief US last week where the nurse used a handheld screen and a wand externally on my belly. We could see two sacs and each one had a bean with a heartbeat. Does that mean they're fraternal? The nurse didn't give me any details.

Slightly, did they guess your were pregnant or specifically pregnant with twins?

slightlyinsane Tue 21-Oct-14 15:53:15

We found out at our routine 12wk scan it was twins, I'll never forget that day.

2 sacs is good but won't tell you if they are fraternal or id. It's wether or not they share a placenta that will give you some indication of what they are. Even if they don't share a placenta they can still be id. The placenta will determine what your antenatal care will be as shared can have more risks. Ask any questions you want there's loads of people on here who've had lots of different experiences.

marlus Tue 21-Oct-14 16:47:46

Hi bonbonbon, I'm in the same situation - found out at our 12 week scan last week that we are having twins. Totally flabbergasted and actually a bit upset, as it means we will have to move, try to find a way to afford childcare for 2 etc. Ours have 2 sacs and 2 placentas, but that is absolutely all I know about it so far... Could anyone share what they did for childcare with twins? We both work four days per week, so only need to find a solution for three days, but that still looks very expensive. We already have a DS (3) and any advice on how to help him to adjust to new house and new siblings would also be great!

Bonbonbonbon Tue 21-Oct-14 18:32:19

Hi Marlus, I really empathize with your mixed feelings. I am a SAHM to a 20 month old and having these twins means an even tighter budget. My husband makes enough now for us to manage but we really live month to month now. There'd be no point in me going back to work now, at least not until my dd is in school, because I'm sure the costs would outweigh the benefits.

We have no family nearby. We want to move to where my family live, but they live in the most expensive place in the country so DH would have to get a job earning double what he's on now in order for that to happen. The cost of living here is 75% lower than where I grew up!

We have a good "village" of friends here but would we be able to manage without family? Not only that, my first cousin also has a 2yo and 6mo twins, and I would love for ours and there's to grow up together.

We currently own our car outright and I had thought we could wait until it dies before replacing it. With twins that will be impossible so we're having to figure out financing for a minivan. Car options are different here in the US. The best 7 seater option for our situation is definitely a minivan. The bigger SUVS are gas hogs.

Marlus, with childcare costs as they are, would it make more sense for one of you to stay home full time until they're in school? Or could you get certified to be an in-home care provider yourself? Apologies if these ideas are not for you, I don't know how you feel about your jobs. Personally I miss the cash but not the commute.

Bonbonbonbon Tue 21-Oct-14 18:34:56

Ergh, theirs not there's.

marlus Wed 22-Oct-14 16:00:06

Thanks bonbonbon,

My mixed feelings are going into a happier direction, but it's funny how enthusiastic people are when I tell them, as if there are no downsides at all. I guess, though, that when they're here, we won't wish it any other way...

My DH and I both work 4 days, so I'm hoping that 3 days childcare will not take up one whole salary. We have both just started in our chosen fields, so not really good timing for s career break... Plus, TBH, I don't think either of us could handle being home with small children all week blush

My family live abroad, but have been very hands-on with DS, so I hope I'll be able to schedule them in one by one this spring and summer, so I'll have a helping hand while they're tiny.

Good luck with the next few weeks! I THINK I'm starting to feel less nauseous now, but will be able to test that out on the 6 hour train journey I've just started smile

Bonbonbonbon Fri 19-Dec-14 21:41:21

Hi ladies! Marlus, how are you getting on with your pregnancy?

We just got our new minivan this week. I know what you mean about everyone being super excited about the twins without considering the impact. Our car payments are going to take a big bite out of our finances, but we had no choice, we need seven seats! We ended up getting a used Toyota Sienna.

So I'm 16 weeks along and both babies appear to be male. My DH is already ordering cricket jumpers.

slightlyinsane Sat 20-Dec-14 13:46:30

Hi Bon, glad things are going well, did you find out if they're identical?

Bonbonbonbon Mon 29-Dec-14 19:11:38

The doctor said they are di-di but there is a 15% chance they could be identical since they are the same sex.

Bodeccia Tue 30-Dec-14 21:57:30

Hi

Congratulations on your bfp! We had our twins when dd1 was 22 months old. They're now 9 months old and dd1 is 2 1/2. We live in a 2 bed flat, yes we'll have to move but not for another year or so. You're probably feeling overwhelmed at the moment, it took me and dh a good month before we actually started speaking again! It is a shock finding out you're having twins, but it is the best thing that has ever happened to me. You don't need to have all the answers yet, you'll find solutions on the way. Just enjoy being pg, relish the time you have with dd1. Btw, my dd1 was totally nonchalant about the dts, a reaction I didn't expect. She loves them now, gives them hugs and so on - v cute.

Fwiw, my dh does all the childcare - cheaper for us.

Twins are a real blessing, it's like you're living something that not many people have. Yes it can be chaotic, and "hard work" but it's also bloody brilliant. Good luck with your pregnancy x

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