I'm mum to b/g twins, who are 18 months old. I also have a 5 year old girl. The early days with the twins were very, very challenging, as many will know, but I suppose I was just so wrapped up in the feeds, sleeps and entertaining my eldest, I just got on with it.
These days, they are turning into toddlers, who make their own toddler demands and my daughter has probably become easier to deal with, as she's just growing up. The problem I have seems to be that I just feel like a human punchbag a lot of the time. Every day is so hard, with the demands, the noise, struggling to get them in the pushchair to take eldest to school, having the food I prepare chucked away by 2 people, just general daily life with the 3.
I think I've come to a stage where I think, "phew, this has been tough and still is tough and there's no break in sight yet". We are a 1 income family, we just lost our child benefit completely, and I don't have a career to go back to that would warrant paying 2 in childcare. I am from Scotland, my husband is from Italy, we live in England, so absolutely no family around to call on in times of need.
All I can think of a lot of the time is getting home to Scotland. My parents are retired, my brother is there and childhood friends. I would so love the company and support. I also just feel like every day away from home is another day I've missed with my family. I've lived here for 7 years and have missed home from day 1, but now more so.
I have lots of fantastic and helpful friends here and I get out to groups and things often, but I just want to be there for my family and they want to be there for me. My husband is fab and very supportive, but is reluctant to change jobs, as he fears the uncertainty of it.
A lot of the time people tell me I need to basically make the most of what I have, not long for what I don't have. But I don't know anyone else in my position, so I don't think people can truly understand. Everyone else I know has at least one family nearby.
Sorry for the essay! I just need to put this down somewhere! Anyone else feeling similarly?
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It's really hard work just now
15 replies
Fandangos · 14/01/2013 12:05
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