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really bloody gets on my toot!!!

(20 Posts)
sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 12:51:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toothache Thu 14-Apr-05 13:06:35

Do you really think that was her reaction or were you perhaps looking for that reaction a little bit. Please don't think I'm dismissing your concerns.... I just know that when I was pg with ds DH and I hadn't married yet. I was very selfconscious about peoples reaction to me being an unmarried mother and also when ds was born I hated the reactions of people when they realised ds had a different surname to me. In hindsight, I was probably being a bit overly sensitive and judging peoples reaction harshly.

Might be way off the mark here and if I am I'm sorry.

sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 13:27:05

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sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 13:30:50

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Blu Thu 14-Apr-05 13:33:11

Well, you know her true mind, now SS.
Difficult, isn't it?

Errrm, is this woman to be trusted with your dds?

My Mum was a classroom volunteer in a rural; school, and the other volunteer (another gran) was overtly racist. My bro stopped his kids going home to her / her daughters house because of the things she said about people like my ds!

On the other hand, dp often gets 'funny' reactions at groups etc from Mums because he is a Man.

Toothache Thu 14-Apr-05 13:33:56

I just can't imagine why people react like that!

I remember actually being asked constantly if I was happy about the pregnancy! Well I was bloody ecstatic and so was DH (then DP)!! But coz I wasn't married and I was only 22 a few people openly assumed it was a mistake and I was devastated.

sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 13:39:17

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Blu Thu 14-Apr-05 13:53:39

I meant if your dd goes on a playdate.

The good thing is that if you have Mum's meet-ups yuo might gradually educate her (by osmosis, iyswim)....and then she won't pass such nonsense on to her kids - but I agree it's exasperating and wearing to continually have to do that.

Mud Thu 14-Apr-05 18:51:13

Maybe it was a reaction to bothering a DH with mum's stuff. It might not even be to do with colour but more a reaction to him being a man

have you finished your essay yet strawberry ol' gal?

AnnieQ Thu 14-Apr-05 18:54:41

I could be wrong but I suspect it was a reaction to him being a man rather than to his race, tbh. My dh was once given a really hard time by some women at dd's playgroup when one of her friends climbed onto his lap to have a story read - it was deemed inappropriate for him to go anywhere near the children because he is a man.

foxinsocks Thu 14-Apr-05 19:06:50

I think that's awful.

But I now feel bad because there's a little girl in dd's year who is mixed race and has the most gorgeous hair (beautifully in little plaits - it's just adorable) and I went and made a fuss about it (just told her I thought it looked lovely). Do you see that as a problem (I mean should I have just kept my mouth shut!)? I didn't even think about the mixed race bit, I just honestly thought what beautiful hair she had.

paolosgirl Thu 14-Apr-05 19:18:12

I think I would agree with Annie. It may have just been that she was uncomfortable with giving her number out to a man she's never met before.

sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 23:08:34

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Blu Thu 14-Apr-05 23:10:44

And, you know, people who are out and out racist do exist. whether we like to believe it or not.

sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 23:11:40

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sallyenglebertstrawberry Thu 14-Apr-05 23:13:52

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nightowl Fri 15-Apr-05 00:02:23

are you sure it wasnt that she didnt like the idea of the other mums seeing her giving her phone number out to someone elses husband? i wouldnt, for fear of what the gossips would come up with! but then i am a paranoid person anyway.

sallyenglebertstrawberry Fri 15-Apr-05 00:21:53

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sallyenglebertstrawberry Fri 15-Apr-05 00:31:12

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nightowl Fri 15-Apr-05 00:51:32

i didnt mean that!! i meant was she afraid the other mums would think she was coming on to other people's husbands!

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