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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

waiting at home for mc - what to tell work?

3 replies

treehugga · 03/05/2010 20:18

I had the scan today (11 wks) and am opting for the natural route. Problem is I don't want to tell work I was p as will disadvantage me (only recently back from DD1). Also don't really want to go into office and have it all kick off there, as it's 1hr15 mins by train to home, and there are no secrets. There's a lot of working from home at our office, and my boss would let me do this if I had a good reason. I don't like lying (hate it actually and poor at it) but could do with a cover story that has same management (am currently feeling fine and can easily do my work). Any ideas? Or can you get a doctor's note that doesn't specify the cause?

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Pollyanna · 03/05/2010 20:23

Hi there. sorry to hear about your mc.
Firstly, yes you can get a drs note that doesn't specify the cause - I had one that just said "hospital admission" for my recent mc. I ended up telling 2 people but most people just think I had swine flu.

One other point - I also had a long train journey to work and was worried about flooding at work. the dr told me that I would get warning and I did - I started having period type pains around 24 hours before heavier bleeding started. I went to work in the end and kept having anxious loo visits. I didn't want to sit at home waiting to miscarry and I took 3 weeks off after the event.

Is there a reason why you prefer the natural route? I must admit that if I had to go through it all again I would opt for erpc, but I know that we all have different issues etc.

So sorry you're going through this - it's a rubbish thing to happen.

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treehugga · 03/05/2010 20:42

Thanks Pollyanna. Very useful information.

Am still a bit torn of which route. The reason I think I want the natural route is because the way the doc described the risks it sounded like surgery was more high risk (perforated womb, repeat surgery, blood loss). I anyway know that general anaesthetics take quite a toll on me, and I have a mild/medium fear of hospitals too.

On the other hand, at least with surgery I could organise childcare, and could contain the work worries too. I suppose I am naively thinking the home route could be quicker and cleaner, and if I can get some meds it might be bearable.

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randomimposter · 03/05/2010 21:02

Hi treehugga - sorry to read your post.

I have had 2 MMCs, for the first chose ERPC. I HATE hospitals, procedures etc etc. But it was REALLY fine. Over and done with. Really quick recovery. And as you say you know where you are, can arrange childcare etc.

Second time round, there was a nearly 2 weeks wait for ERPC; I MC naturally whilst "on the list", 6 days after the scan. Fortunately I am an SAHM, so work not an issue. Like Pollyanna says I did get some warning too, but only a few hours. But it was quite scary in terms of blood loss. Main part of it over in 5 hours, but I literally couldn't leave the bathroom. But it was also ok.

But in terms of what to tell work; I know what you mean it's hard to have an appropriate cover story when you hate lying. But Docs note needn't be specific, but it IS more what you say in person. Sorry I can't help more with that issue.... but maybe I have helped show that ERPC needn't be a bad choice.

Good luck
x

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