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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

just had 6th miscarriage

8 replies

annie51 · 15/10/2009 12:40

Hi

My first post.
Have look at these message boards in the past, generally while crying my eyes out at the same time.
I had a mis just after we got married then went on to have 2 healthy girls 6 and 4. Then another 5 mis's.
Have had all the tests one after the 3rd. tried asprin for the fourth on and now this time progesterone. Nothing has worked.
This time has been the worst, the d & C was the worst ever. In the hospital for before 9am, no beds dispite being booked in for admission, had to sit in the corridor for hours, didn't get home until 10pm and that was after losing it and totally breaking down as they wanted to leave me to the next day. I had already been given a pessary otherwise I would have went home.
I hate the way you'r left to last or whwn they can fit you in, if someone comes in with a broken arm that needs surgry they get operated on before you dispite the fact that you might be in agony due to the pessary.
Sorry for ranting but between the overwhelming sadness at the unfairness of losing again and the awful experiance in hospital I am still raw.

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tigerbear · 15/10/2009 13:26

Hello annie51, just wanted to give a virtual hug to you.
So sorry you have had to go through this. I hope you have lots of support in RL? How is your DH coping with it? Does he talk about it or not?

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kissmummy · 15/10/2009 21:06

hi annie51
i have just hposted about having my fourth miscarriage and totally know how you feel. this time has been my worst too. i had had the day from hell already and then had to put up with crap treatment at the NHS clinic where they initially told us to come in right away; then said to wait for a proper appointment at 3pm; and then when i turned up at 3pm, asked why i didn't come in earlier !
we were left waiting for ages in a waiting room so cramped you actually rubbed knees with the person next to you; and then finally seen by someone who didn't have a clue about my history even though i've been in that wretched clinic three times now and they should have a file on me. And they can't do the D+C until Monday because it's fully booked tomorrow and they don't operate at weekends . Sorry to rant but it's a long way of saying i totally understand your anger and frustration at the CRAP treatment in hospitals. are you planning to go on trying? i honestly don't think i can bear to go through it again.

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annie51 · 15/10/2009 22:21

Hi tigerbear kissmummy.
Thanks for your replies.
DH copes in his own way different to mine, to me it's babies lost, due dates remembered, to him its over don't think about it. Saying that he gives me all the support I need, I really couldn't ask for more eg got up this morning (he is always away to work by time I need to get up) and found that he had unloaded the dishwasher while I got an early night last night thanks to a sleeping tab.
Kissmummy I know how you feel dispite me recognising nurses and registrars they don't remember you. Its the hospital that I need to go to the gynae ward and they never have my notes need to go through all the history, medication etc every time.
Excuse my ignorance but what's RL.

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tigerbear · 15/10/2009 22:28

Hi annie - RL is MN speak for Real Life!
I agree with how most DH's cope with it - maybe they do think about it all more than we know, but my DH is the same. I was telling him yesterday that I was sad because I would have been 2 months pg yesterday if the pregnancy had progressed, but he barely said anything about it.
I guess because they don't have any of the physical symptoms / hormones, it's more difficult for them to fully 'get' the being pregnant thing (or not) as they don't have to cope with any of that. To them it's just you are either pregnant or you're not. They don't get all of the 'inbetween' stages.

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kissmummy · 16/10/2009 08:53

annie51 i took sleeping tab last night too! i use them very sparingly and obviously not at all during pregnancy so it was the first one i've had in months and months. i lay awake for ages and then suddenly remembered i was allowed to take the pills now i'm not preg any more. small comfort!

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annie51 · 16/10/2009 12:44

Hi
I'm not coping this time. My sister in law has had a boy 2 weeks ago and both my sisters had boys in the month that I was due the last mis. Birthday party for 2year old tomorrow don't know if I can face but due to previous fall out with MIL can't avoid. Still crampy and bleeding but its not been a full week, have taken 3 sleeping tabs in that week and still not had a good night's sleep(mind over matter).
The girls are a lifesaver I must get up and take them to school then look ok to collect them so can't have red puffy eyes must pull myself together around now. DH wanted to come home from work yesterday I was in that must of a state but told him not to.
Really thought that we had cracked it this time. I'm 40 next year so miscarriage chances rise to 51% due to age along with 60% due to previous 6 so I think that was our last chance. Saying that never say never,I said after the 3rd that was enough and look another 3.
Anybody any success stories after so many, as said tests all done and back clear.

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kissmummy · 17/10/2009 13:15

how are you today annie ?

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annie51 · 17/10/2009 19:30

Had birthday party today for 2 yr old. MIL and DH had words. I've enough to cope with without the IL's making things akward.
Another sleeping tab last night actually worked I only woke twice best night's sleep in at least a month. Still on painkillers but would love a glass of wine unsure how it will effect me so will leave until next wend at earliest.
How u feeling now?