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Feeling unreasonable

(4 Posts)
undertheduvet Mon 12-Oct-09 12:33:06

I know that I am being a bit unreasonable and I dont expect any replies, I think I just need to rant on here at what I can't say in rl.

I had a miscarriage in June at 10 weeks, although the baby had been gone for 2 weeks prior to that, I think i have recovered quite well, I was lucky in that physically it was straightforward, I had medical management only needing one lot of tablets and I didnt have any pain bar a few light cramps. Mentally I thought I was doing ok too, me and DH have talked about it and are both looking to the future as you can't change whats happened in the past and we dont want it to dominate our lives.

We are back ttc at the mo, but no luck so far, but it has only been 3 cycles so not panicking just yet! I know im lucky in that we already have a DS who is 3.11 so I do appreciate how lucky I am.

However, I have just found out that another of my friends is pregnant and it has made me really sad and feeling I just want to shout 'When will it be my turn!'

This is the fourth person to announce their pregnancy since my miscarriage, and I am really please for them all, i really am, i wouldn't wish what happened to me on my worst enemy, it was truely the worst thing that has happened to me.
It just feels so unfair, why not me? The other pregnancys are a friend having her third child, my dear bro and sil and my cousin and his girlfriend.
This is the hardest one for me to cope with as they have the exact same due date that I would have had.
They live in Australia so at least Im not faced with it in front of me but i had to block her status updates on facebook as they were all about the baby and how long it was to go.

Im sorry to ramble away, as I said i dont expect responses I just needed to get that off my chest

PolarBear74 Mon 12-Oct-09 16:15:09

I can understand where you are coming from as my SIL has a due date 4 days from where mine would have been and it feels shite.

One of my best friends has just given birth and I'm worried about how I will feel when i see her son as I would have had a due date now from my first mC this year

So you are not on your own, x

kanella Mon 12-Oct-09 20:42:12

Hi Ladies

So sorry for your losses. I had a MMC in early August, although I only had my ERPC 3 weeks ago - long story!!

I totally feel the same, my friend in OZ has just had a boy and so has my cousin, she has had her 3rd baby. I feel so sad, I can't bear to talk to them, I bought lots of baby clothes for them and wished them the best but I know you can't help but think 'why me'. Another school friend who I confined in about my MMC has just told me she is 6 months pregnant, she kept it so long from me because she didn't want me to feel bad. Out of all my friends my age I am the only 'one without child'. My partner is back from his job abroad soon, will be nice to see him, haven't seen him since my mc, we will just have to try again, fingers crossed.

We will our time soon, chin up ladies.


hairyclaireyfairy Sat 17-Oct-09 14:05:30

I think it's fairly normal to feel sad for what may have been when others become pregnant.I see regually two little darlings one about 20 months the other 9 months, both mums' were pregnant at the same stage as me when I had my miscarriages and it is still hard even now.
Just wanted you to konw you are not alone. xxx

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