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reassurance needed :-(

(7 Posts)
NUFC1981 Mon 28-Sep-09 14:28:14

I've just had my first miscarriage from my first pregnancy at about 8-9 weeks gone. Now I can't help but convince myself that I won't get pregnant again. I try not to think like this but can't seem to help it sometimes and I get so upset because I really want to be a mum.

I know that no-one can wave a magic wand or have a crystal ball to convince me that it will happen but any reassurance would be much appreciated!

womblemeister Mon 28-Sep-09 14:32:25

It will happen, it will. My first pg also miscarried at 6 weeks. I got pregnant with DC1 six months later. My miscarriage happened on 25 October 2002. On the 25 October 2004 - I saw the date on the ultrasound screens both times - the doctor confirmed I was 6 weeks pg with DC2.

Some people say that the first pg is often a trial run as the womb prepares itself for future births. Just relax.

BelleWatling Mon 28-Sep-09 14:38:25

Hi NUFC - how sad sad.

I had two miscarriages - both around the same time as yours (8/9 weeks) and went onto have a successful, healthy pregnancy with my DS. I got pregnant all 3 times straight away so it all happened over a short period of time.

I understand that you feel very poorly and sad at the moment and statistics might not help you but miscarriage is very very common (it's not nice to know this but it helps in some way I think) and your chances of having a successful pregnancy now are the same as they were before. Miscarriage is not generally an indicator of underlying problems unless you have at least 3 in a row. Even then you still have a higher chance of having a successful pregnancy than not.

Some people want to conceive again straight away. Some want time to grieve. You will know what's right for you. I hope you are getting plenty of support from your OH. smile

Mouette Mon 28-Sep-09 20:11:20

Dear NUFC,
I had fertility problems and had to have an operation to conceive. After 18 months of trying I finally got pregnant. I lost the baby at 17 weeks. I was very afraid I would not conceive again, but I did. I am 38 and now have a beautiful 6 month old son. If you don't have fertility problems, you will conceive again - after all I did, and I had problems! But you sometimes have to be patient because it can take a bit of time (not because of the mc, just because it can take time). When you are ready to try again, try to make sure you have sex at the right time (around ovulation) and trust me your chances will be very high. You have conceived once, you can do so again. Good luck! Have faith! xx

hoops997 Mon 28-Sep-09 22:29:15

hello NUFC,

I also MC my first pg at 6.5 weeks, that was on the 13th May 2009, had ERPC on 14th May 2009.........then after plenty of BD managed to fall pg again on 23rd June 2009, am now nearly 14 weeks!!

So it can happen again so please don't be disheartened.....you have to give yourself time to get over your loss and be kind to yourself......

When you do feel ready then you can try again, I was told by my doctor that there were no reason to wait to try again other than the emotional ones of me. I had closure of my lost little one, but I won't ever forget him/her.

Like someone else has said, you have done it once you can do it again, I was told that the first time is a practice run and puts you and your body in the right mode hmm

So good luck and hope it happens for you soon

J33nco Wed 30-Sep-09 13:51:06

I had mmc with my 1st pregnancy - baby died at 8 wks but not identified until 12wks. I was CONVINCED it would be impossible for me to get pregnant again esp with 60 day cycles due to PCOS but I got pregnant straight away and am now 10wks pregnant and so far, is sticky and holding in ther.

It's easy to say but you have to rely on nature, when your body thinks it's ready again it will be ready and you have to remember (which I found difficult!) that on average it takes 6m for a couple to get pregnant.

NUFC1981 Wed 30-Sep-09 15:26:51

Thanks for all these messages, I do feel a bit better about things. My OH has been extremely supportive and I couldn't ask him to do any more for me. I am going to see a counsellor next week so hopefully that will help me get through the next few months.

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