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Dr's advice on waiting to conceive after missed miscarriage

(122 Posts)
sausagemcgrah Fri 17-Oct-08 12:43:26

I underwent medical management 2 weeks ago for a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks. I visited the Doctor today, and was advised that I need to wait for at least 1 if not more periods as there is 'an increased risk of miscarriage' if I were to get pregnant again straight away. My Doctor is normally very good, and I would not question her word, but I have not read this anywhere. Is she right? I hope not as the thought of being pregnant again soon is the only thing that is getting me through this!

wheniwasyoung Fri 17-Oct-08 12:45:30

I'm sorry for your loss. sad

I was advised to wait until I had one period after my miscarriage as it helps when dating for when I did get pregnant. I had one period, conceived twins but later lost one, but who knows the reason why.

I would recommend you try and wait until after your next period and then go for it.

Good luck. smile

I'm sorry for your loss.

That's the standard advice. It seems to fit with common sense too - ensuring the womb lining is new and healed.

Please make sure you give yourself a chance to grieve too. I put everything into having another baby - which ended up happening a lot later due to medical issues - and it caused me terrible problems. Give yourself a chance to feel what you need to now.

neolara Fri 17-Oct-08 12:51:07

According to Professor Lesley Regan's book "Miscarriage - what every woman should know", there is no medical reason to wait for your period before TTC again. She seems to be one of the UK experts in miscarriage. I rang the Miscarriage Association because I was given advice to wait 3 months after medical management. They also said there is no need to wait.

Good luck.

sausagemcgrah Fri 17-Oct-08 20:09:46

Thanks everyone,
I think we'll just start to try but keep it low key and if it happens it happens. I guess if my body isn't ready it wont happen anyway.
neolara - I hope I'm not being too intrusive, and please don't answer if I am, but how long ago was your miscarriage? And are you trying again? How are things going?

snooks Fri 17-Oct-08 20:19:11

hi sausage, i am sorry about your mc.

I had a mc last year (july) at 9 weeks exactly. It was very straightforward (medically wise), no intervention, just bleeding for a week. I conceived a couple of weeks afterwards (no period) and dd is now almost 6 months. I know everyone is very different, but my gut instinct was to go for it, and I found no medical evidence to suggest otherwise.

Do whatever you feel to be right - trust your body, and trust your instincts. Best of luck smile

Sallyallyally Fri 17-Oct-08 20:19:48

Really heartbreaking isn't it. I had a miscarriage (all occured without need for D and C) at 9 weeks in March 2006. We kept trying almost straightaway though as I felt the only think to fill the hole was another baby. Pregnant in June 06 and healthy baby boy in Feb 07, so keep your chin up honey.
Best friend miscarried Dec 24th 07, her baby is due next week. grin
Lots of love xxxxx

Sallyallyally Fri 17-Oct-08 20:20:51

'thing' not 'think'!

llareggub Fri 17-Oct-08 20:22:22

I had two missed miscarriages in quick succession this year. I conceived again in mid August and am now 11 ish weeks pregnant.

I visited my doctor just after my positive test in August and she suggested I take a daily aspirin as a way of reducing the risk of miscarriage. She couldn't promise that it would work but touch wood, the signs are good.

I didn't wait between cycles. I read on mn that the chances of conceiving are greater after a miscarriage and I would certainly agree that this has been the case with me. However, it has been an emotionally charged year and I would give yourself the space to recover mentally as well as physically. Good luck.

TheFallenMadonna Fri 17-Oct-08 20:23:10

I was told to try to wait for one cycle only because of dating. No medical reason not conceive earlier.

cmotdibbler Fri 17-Oct-08 20:24:55

I conceived straightaway after my third miscarriage - the recurrent miscarriage consultant said that there was no need to wait to TTC unless it had been a late or complex miscarriage. I had my ERPC 28/8/05, BFP 17/10/05, beautiful baby boy ( at 35 weeks) 20/5/06

sausagemcgrah Fri 17-Oct-08 20:28:54

Hi and thanks snooks, sallyallyally and llareggub. I'm sorry you all went through this too, but it is so uplifting to hear such positive stories right now when everything just seems so hopeless. Let's hope it happens quickly for us too.

sausagemcgrah Fri 17-Oct-08 20:31:21

Took me so long to write that last post that two more posts had appeared. More positive stories! I am feeling so much better already. hanks TheFallenMadonna and cmotdibbler

berolina Fri 17-Oct-08 20:32:09

I have had mcs in consecutive cycles and a cople of medics blamed the speed of conception for the second of the two. However, the second of the two was a blighted ovum, with entirely normal hCG levels, and there is no way on earth that can be caused by another recent mc. I think with mc people, including medics, sometimes search for easy explanations where there are none.

After that mc (no. 3 altogether, no. 2 consecutively) I was keen to wait for a couple of periods, but not for medical reasons - simply to give myself a break.

berolina Fri 17-Oct-08 20:33:06

(btw, ds2 was conceived 4 months later )

neolara Fri 17-Oct-08 20:35:20

Sausagemcgrah - I had an ERPC on Monday after failed medical management last week, so not quite in ttc mode yet. But I probably won't wait more than a month and may get going earlier than that. I think I'll wait and see how I'm feeling.

This is actually my fourth miscarriage. After my first (naturally occuring) miscarriage we got straight on with trying, became pregnant three months later and had my DD. After my second (medically managed) missed miscarriage I which was discovered at 12 weeks, I was very sad and didn't try for a couple of months. This was mainly because we were going abroad and was really worried about it happening again while in the middle of Africa. After this I got pregnant in the fourth month of trying but I was a complete basket case during that pregnancy, although happily it ended well in the birth of my son. I found the early weeks very stressful and I think it was probably good that we had waited a bit on that occasion because I was so sad. My third miscarriage was very early and so we didn't wait after that. Got pregnant two months later and unfortunately this is that one that has just ended (missed miscarriage at 10 weeks). Sorry, that was probably way more info than you were looking for.

We're very lucky that we don't seem to have any difficulty getting pregnant - it's just staying pregnant that's the problem. Hopefully next time it will work out.

sausagemcgrah Sat 18-Oct-08 14:39:11

neolara I'm so sorry to hear of all that you've been through, and know what you mean about not being in TTC mode yet. I desperately want to be pregnant again, but can't face the whole TTC process. Not the actual baby making bit - but the am I aren't I, why's it not happening part. It's a real rollercoaster isn't it!

I really hope it works out for you next time. I am struggling to come to terms with one miscarriage. I have enormous respect for you, having had to cope with 4.

louisesh Mon 20-Oct-08 15:05:00

I underwent medical management on 17th oct 2008 for a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks.I agree the information with regards to ttc again is confusing.Some of the websites state to wait 3 months yet the nursing staff i dealt with advised to wait until i have had 1 period.However i have made a balanced decision with my husband to ttc asap.Although i am aware i can never replace my loss i wish to pick myself up and make some steps towards moving on towards my healing process.Its encouraging to read everyones experiences on this website.Love to us all xx

sausagemcgrah Mon 20-Oct-08 18:14:03

So sorry to hear of your loss louisesh. Following all the advice on here regarding trying again, DH and I have also decided to go for it already. It's going to be hard though. I don't think I've ever wanted something so much. It's going to be a long journey to get back to the point we were at! Good luck to you. We'll get there.

louisesh Mon 20-Oct-08 21:06:14

Thanks for your kind words SAUSAGEMCGRAH i m trying not to hope too muuch as don t want to become desperate.Just keep telling myself i had no problems concieving last time so hopefully...... I am convinced i will again get pregnant aiming for xmas.I know i should nt put this pressure on us but feel i need a timeline to aim for instead of drifting aimlessly along.Wish you all the luck in the world xx

sausagemcgrah Tue 21-Oct-08 18:10:02

Louisesh, I hope you manage to conceive before Christmas. I would be thrilled if DH and I managed before then too. I just keep thinking of how many weeks I should have been and it's so upseting. I keep doing silly things like resting my hand on my tummy to be close to the baby then remember it's not there.

louisesh Tue 21-Oct-08 20:58:41

I know what you mean sausagemcgrah.I should have been 12 weeks today effectively in a safer period!!!! instead i m looking at holidays i can t really afford so i ve got something to focus on.Don t know about you but am finding it hard to try and remain positive find life all very boring and depressing at the moment. xx

Sabs1981 Wed 22-Oct-08 20:34:49

I had a miscarriage 4 weeks ago. It was my first pregnancy and i was 11 weeks pregnant. Will post my full story on here soon, but medics told me to wait 3 months until we try again and have written so in my notes. They also offered a scan in the EPAU at 7 weeks which once (if) I do get pregnant which I find so reassuring. Have booked a holiday to India with hubby at the end of the year so hopefully will feel more in the right frame of mind to start trying again once we get back

92108 Wed 22-Oct-08 22:24:42

I was stunned by the similarity of your situation to mine. I was 11 wks (baby was 9 wks) and miscarried on 9/21 though I had signs the week before. It was my first pregnancy as well. Send me a message if you would like a friend to chat with.
PS- Has anyone else had extreme fatigue after m/c? I find that I need a nap nearly every afternoon even after a full night's rest.

92108 Wed 22-Oct-08 22:26:13

Sorry I meant Sabs1981. For some reason my pc displayed things backwards

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