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Confused - Medical Management

(10 Posts)
Gems7 Wed 06-May-20 07:32:26

This is my story and I'm really hoping somebody can tell me if what I am experiencing right now is normal because I am very confused and just a bit frightened in general about this process 😒 Although I am finding this board a great sense of comfort at the moment.
We found out I was pregnant after 9 cycles of trying on 4th April, ecstatic doesn't even come close, our dreams were coming true, and just in time as I turned 36 a week later and on that day I started spotting, very lightly and only when I wiped..
I had a scan just over 2 weeks ago when I would have been 6 weeks (going off LMP), she said she could see a foetal pole measuring 4mm with no heartbeat and she said she was surprised, there was a patch of bleeding opposite the sac to the side, they arranged a scan for the week after to confirm.
That whole week wait was awful, My partner tried to remain positive whilst I was so upset and resigned myself to the fact that I would miscarry but at the next scan the gentleman who scanned me (and a second person) saw a foetal pole with a heartbeat measuring 4mm, he said the patch of bleeding was insignificant (I was still spotting) so as you can imagine we were absolutley over the moon and started getting really excited for the future with our baby, we thought about names and nursery as you do..
They arranged another scan for this Tuesday just to confirm that the baby was growing as the measurements were the same but he said that was okay as they were dealing with such tiny measurements at this stage and questioned if the lady the previous week had even seen the foetal pole.
so yesterday I had my third scan at the hospital feeling much more relaxed than the previous weeks to be told that my baby had more than doubled in size since last week but that there was now no heartbeat 😞 it had stopped and recently he said. The patch of bleeding now gone. Yesterday morning was the worst morning of my life. Just over 8 weeks pregnant and my baby's heart had now stopped.. why? What did I do wrong? I ate so healthy, took my vitamins and didn't over-do it.. Was it the walk I went on the evening before? The nurse assured me it wasn't and after discussing the options available to me (surgery not being one of them) I opted for medical management..
I had four tablets dissolved under my tongue at the hospital (they wouldn't let me do it at home) waited for an hour then went home..
the cramps started pretty much straight away at the hospital and when I walked through the front door at home I started bleeding. The cramps were awful, really painful for 2-3 hours, I cried the whole time due to a mixture of pain and grief but dihydrocodeine helped (plus a hot water bottle my mum dropped off was a godsend) and after those first few hours I was fine.. I didn't cramp all last night, just bled like a medium to light period and I have woken up this morning with no blood on my pad and no pain. I'm really confused.
Does this mean the tablets have failed?
Should I have passed something by now?
How long should I have been cramping for?
I think I was expecting yesterday to be a nightmare all day and night and for it to be quicker than this. I'm so confused right now on top of being in so much pain emotionally. I have been on such a rollercoaster the last couple of weeks and I can't bear the thought of this process taking weeks 😞 I honestly don't know how all you strong women have gotten through this before me, it's horrendous.
I'm sorry for the huge essay I would really appreciate some advice if anybody has any about of what I am experiencing is normal xx

OP’s posts: |
CherryPavlova Wed 06-May-20 07:51:39

You didn’t do anything wrong. Sadly, something like 1:4/1:3 pregnancies miscarry in first twelve weeks. It’s hugely sad for you but really something hat happens frequently.
It doesn’t mean future pregnancies will miscarry.
Take time to be sad, then look forward to future happiness.

berrychakewellplease Wed 06-May-20 07:57:18

Sorry for your loss. I had MMC in October I was 12 weeks and foetus/embryo measured 7 weeks. I was admitted overnight. I bleed overnight lots of clots and cramping and passed the products. Went home 9am. I bled on and off for a week I think then felt better but had a scan booked 10 days after treatment to check all is okay. I was signed off initially for two weeks by the maxing hospital doctor. I did have e some complications so was signed off for two more weeks. thanks

Gems7 Wed 06-May-20 08:04:28

@CherryPavlova Thankyou xx

@berrychakewellplease I'm really sorry for your loss, that must have been an awful time for you. You passed the pregnancy tissue quite quickly then, I was really hoping that would have been the same for me. I'm not sure if the tablets have failed.. I will see how today goes and maybe call EPU first thing tomorrow morning. Thankyou for replying, it really helps listening to other people's experiences xx

OP’s posts: |
Rosegoldglass Wed 06-May-20 08:05:24

Sorry for your loss OP, I had a MMC and medical management. You didn’t do anything wrong, look after yourself. I remember passing the fetus at home when they expected it to happen at the hospital the next day.
I’m not certain what the ‘normal’ level of bleeding is, could you call the hospital that gave you medication to ask is this in the parameters of what they expect.

Gems7 Wed 06-May-20 08:11:26

@Rosegoldglass yes I think I will see if anything happens today and call them in the morning or maybe later today. I just thought I should have passed some clots or tissue by now but I haven't, only some bleeding. Thankyou for your advice xx

OP’s posts: |
lounger40 Wed 06-May-20 08:20:34

So sorry for your loss OP, it's difficult time 💐
I've been there and was given tablets to start the process however they didn't work for me over 2 days-nothing was happening, no blood whatsoever. They say this can happen. In the end I had a D & C in hospital as just wanted it over with asap. Staff will be able to advise on next steps when you speak to them. Sending hugs x

Gems7 Wed 06-May-20 08:49:02

@lounger40 Thankyou hun, I'm sorry you had to go through this too.
I had hoped it would be over quickly. Like you I'm thinking that possibly the tablets haven't worked but I think if I call EPU now they will ask me to wait a little while longer as I only had them yesterday morning so I will see how today goes xx

OP’s posts: |
berrychakewellplease Wed 06-May-20 09:33:33

@Gems7 hope you fell better soon. Sort of relived I was admitted overnight. I hope you are getting well looked after. I did call EPAU several times and they were so helpful. Did you have a scan booked for review? They said something along the lines of 10 days before scanning or rescanning. I am not sure whether this is standard protocol to scan every person after a MC. I would call them now if you are worried. They always explained things better than my google searches could!

Poppy10121 Wed 06-May-20 10:02:51

Hi @Gems7 I'm so sorry for your loss flowers

I had a very similar situation myself one month ago, my baby's heartbeat had stopped at 8 weeks but I hadn't miscarried naturally and I took the medical management. I had a similar experience to you, and was surprised there wasn't more blood, especially as the pain was so bad. I started to feel better in myself and even went running again a week later (!) but around 10 days after taking the tablets, I suddenly had a gush of blood, cramping started up again just like the day I'd taken the tablets, and over the course of a day I passed what felt like endless clots and some tissue.

Apparently although most people get the effects of the MMC tablets immediately, for some it can take 7-14 days to trigger things. I wish someone had told me this before it happened - luckily I was at home and I was able to phone the EPU for advice while it was happening.

Everyone is different, but this may be what is happening to you as well. I would be careful and carry pads with you wherever you go and try not to leave the house for a couple of weeks if you can. It has surprised me by taking so long, 3.5 weeks later I am still getting some light bleeding now.

If you are worried I would recommend calling the EPU or requesting to be seen again. You can also call the Miscarriage Association who give good advice and reassurance.

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