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Struggling for reality to hit after d&c

(4 Posts)
StrugglingSal Thu 28-Mar-19 20:05:39

Yesterday I had a d&c to remove a failed pregnancy/ suspected molar pregnancy. I had a little bleeding in the run up to the procedure and some bleeding and pain immediately after the procedure.
I haven’t had any since, and feel almost like I need some kind of side effect afterwards for the reality of the procedure to hit.
I’m finding it very surreal that I was put to sleep and it’s suddenly all over with no recollection of the pregnancy being removed. Worried that I can’t process the pregnancy no longer existing if I have no real experience of it leaving me. Is this a weird way to feel? Does anyone else know how to help this feel real?

OP’s posts: |
peachgreen Thu 28-Mar-19 20:26:45

I'm so sorry for your loss, OP. I felt very similar when I had an ERPC after a missed miscarriage. However, it did "hit me" a few months later and I went through the grieving process then. Let yourself feel whatever you feel, be kind to yourself. There's no right or wrong way to feel.

betterbehomesoon Thu 28-Mar-19 21:26:16

I felt the same way after my ERPC - its a surreal thing to go through. It did feel like a dream to me - but even now I still think about that pregnancy. Make sure you talk about your feelings and your baby, I dunno about you but I didn't hide the miscarriage from my close friends and family - we spoke about it a lot and that helped me grieve. I know people who have planted a bush or tree to represent their pregnancy. There isn't a right or wrong way - how you feel right now is how you feel, just be kind to yourself.

sadtoday21 Fri 29-Mar-19 11:47:30

@StrugglingSal I had a partial molar pregnancy and d&c, so happy to talk to you about it if you need more info during the recovery. I cried uncontrollably as soon as I woke up from the d&c, I never cry and it was very surreal. I think I was partly relieved that the medical part was over - I remember thanking the nurse for helping me get through it - and partly sad of course for the loss of my baby. It will get less surreal as you have time to process everything. There is still a long road ahead for you, unfortunately, so try to take the time now to do things you enjoy and nurture yourself and let your body and mind heal. X

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