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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Pregnancy loss advice please

7 replies

Claw001 · 09/11/2018 11:15

My sons girlfriend had a late miscarriage. They have organised a funeral, named the baby etc. However, they wanted baby to have my sons last name on headstone. Funeral director is saying this is not possible and baby has to have mum’s surname.

Any advice much appreciated.

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Michellebops · 09/11/2018 16:58

Sorry for your family loss.
How many weeks was the pregnancy?
If far enough along for a birth and a death certificate (over 24 weeks) there shouldn't be an issue.

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herethereandnow · 09/11/2018 17:19

Oh that's an awful situation, I'm really not sure but you should get in touch with the miscarriage association 01924 200799, they are open during the week. Hopefully theyll help or know what your next steps should be. So sorry for your loss, sending you hugs and love. Xx

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Claw001 · 09/11/2018 17:26

Thank you. Not 24 weeks, no birth or death certificate.

Seems the only certificate needed was a midwife certificate. Which the funeral director has and is not allowed to budge from. So fathers name cannot go on coffin plaque or cross plaque at the grave at all.

Hospital are refusing to add fathers name to any of the paperwork. Such a shame.

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Claw001 · 09/11/2018 17:58

Thank you Herethere, I’ve written the number down x

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DaisyChainsForever · 09/11/2018 19:11

Can they add his name in a different way, ie, son/daughter of.. then your son and daughter in laws name?

Sorry for your loss OP 

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Michellebops · 09/11/2018 19:30

That's such a shame. If he was named can your sons surname not be added like a middle name.
I was only 12 weeks when I miscarried so our baby will be cremated using my surname as we're not married. Unfortunately we don't get a headstone but were able to arrange an engraved leaf on our hospital memory tree ThanksThanks

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Claw001 · 09/11/2018 21:24

Daisy apparently not. His name can only be added as a double barrel on the headstone. Not on coffin or grave cross.

Michelle, so sorry you’ve experienced similar Flowers. My son and his girlfriend have paid privately. So sorry for your loss 😢 xxx it’s such a difficult time

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