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Miscarriage - this sounds stupid, but what do I do?

(20 Posts)
bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 09:30:57

Basically, I missed my period last month and put it down to stress (I've been having medical tests and work is a bit full on). Did a pregnancy test last week just to check and it was positive.

I woke up at about 2 in the morning with stomach cramps (like really bad period cramps) and heavy bleeding ever since. Eventually I just had to set up camp in the bathroom since it was too heavy to really do anything else.

I'm still bleeding now, but it seems to have become a bit less heavy. This is the first time this has ever happened to me and, although it sounds super stupid, I'm not sure what to do now? Am I okay to just carry on, or do I need to seek medical advice? I obviously hadn't informed anyone about my pregnancy yet (except DP, who is away on a school residential!) so not sure about contacting my GP or what. I feel like everything's probably okay physically. I'm also not sure if I can take painkillers, but I'd like to because I'm really sore.

Called sick for work and they said come in for the afternoon if you can (we've got a big meeting). I may have to say no, or is that a bit feeble?

I just feel a bit numb, to be honest! Sorry for the hundred questions.

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NC4Now Mon 01-Oct-18 09:35:58

You don’t need to go to work. Take the time off. You are probably drained and not up to it.
How are you feeling? I was very tearful and took a few days off, but everyone’s different.
I think it’s not a bad idea to pop in to see your GP to have it put on record. It may be a relevant part of your medical history.
Also, your bleeding may be a bit in and off, so just put your feet up and rest if you can today.

Bowlofbabelfish Mon 01-Oct-18 09:37:29

I’m so sorry. flowers

Assuming you’re 4-8 weeks, basically ride out the physical stuff as long as you’re able to. If you have:

Fever/flu like feeling
Severe / unusual pain
Uni sided pain
Heavy bleeding (soaking a pad an hour)
Smelly bleeding

Then seek medical attention. Any other symptoms that worry you seek help too.

Otherwise you can generally manage it at home and be ok. The bleeding will continue like a long period. If it doesn’t stop after that time get checked.

Be prepared for some emotional distress as well. Be kind to yourself and take it easy, it’s not a pleasant thing to go through.

If you have any inkling the process has not completed fully then seek help. You can also expect (although not always) some disruption to periods for a few months.

alltalknobaby Mon 01-Oct-18 09:41:28

I agree with the other two posters above. Also I would make an appointment with your GP to get the miscarriage on your record. After 3 they will do tests and investigations to try to find the cause. Hopefully it doesn't come to that but that's what I did, just in case. Sorry for your loss thanks

Justgivemeasoddingname Mon 01-Oct-18 09:41:47

I agree wholehearted with both pp. If there are any after effects it will be important for your GP to know, also if you want a sickline. Listen to your body as you are doing. Take the painkillers.
Hope you're ok xx

Botanica Mon 01-Oct-18 09:43:20

It may also help get your strength back sooner to try and eat iron rich foods and maybe take a supplement for a while.

I'm so sorry this happened. It's such a horrible thing to go through, especially whilst by yourself x

NC4Now Mon 01-Oct-18 09:43:26

I was just thinking with you saying you’ve been having medical tests, it could be relevant.

bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 09:44:55

I kind of don't really feel anything, to be honest, almost as though it's not really happening to me. But then, I hadn't really got my head around the idea of the pregnancy.

Physically, I feel alright - the pain is just like extra-bad period cramps and the bleeding is heavier than my normal period, but does seem to be easing off.

Sorry to be asking dumb questions - it's the first time and I'm a bit clueless. NHS choices seems to imply that it's a good idea to make at appointment, but I feel like I should be okay without at this stage.

Thanks so much for the replies.

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bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 09:48:05

Thank you all - I really do appreciate it. My friend popped round this morning and was offering to drive me to hospital NOW, but I thought it's not ness and didn't fancy it! But it does sound like a good idea to book a GP appointment.

Medical investigations have been cardiology, so (I would guess) unrelated.

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MrsMogginsMinge Mon 01-Oct-18 09:56:46

When I started bleeding and was pretty obviously having a MC (about 7 weeks ish) I phoned my GP surgery to ask (a bit sheepishly) what exactly I was meant to do. The receptionist checked with the GP who told me to pop down to the Early Pregnancy Unit as there was a risk of ectopic at that stage of gestation. The EPU near me is self referral but in other areas the GP can send you. Might be worth a call if you’re not sure how far along you are. They were v nice even though I felt I was asking a stupid question!

Gooseygoosey12345 Mon 01-Oct-18 10:01:30

Worth giving the GP a call to see what they advise. Just take it easy and look after yourself.

bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 10:18:16

Thank you! Now I feel a bit stupid, since I've left it a bit late in the day to call GP. It would probably make more sense to call 111, but I can't face the thought of the 1000 questions! I did just call work to cancel this afternoon, since I don't think I'll feel up to it; my manager was Not Impressed.

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MrsMogginsMinge Mon 01-Oct-18 10:47:33 To check if there’s one near you

bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 11:41:42

Thanks - my nearest one is very close (in London) so that is good to know. I did call my GP surgery in the end though, and I'm waiting for a call back from them - so I'll see what they advise. I'd guess that I was 6/7 weeks.

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bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 14:48:54

And thank you again to everyone for the advice, it was really helpful when I was a bit shellshocked and not really succeeding in making any sense of the online NHS information available and so on. I'm still trying to make a call on work tomorrow - I feel kind of like I should go in if at all possible, especially since I'm behind on deadlines because of the recent medical issues. I'm actually feeling alright-ish, just a bit drained and still quite sore, but not really too bad overall.

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bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 22:15:53

Getting a call back from the GP tomorrow, so I will see what they say /advise. I'm planning on being back at work tomorrow too, although this evening I've been weirdly emotional and had a bit of a random crying fit about nothing at all, so I'm afraid it is not a wonderful idea. The alternative though is offering my ferocious project manager further details, which is not really a happy prospect!

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HumpHumpWhale Mon 01-Oct-18 22:23:05

Your hormones will be a bit all over the place, so you'll be emotional even if you're not upset about losing the pregnancy. Do take painkillers - I found ibuprofen best, and a hot water bottle helped too. I did a lot of random crying after mine so work was out, but you'll know yourself if you're going to find it overwhelming or a good distraction.

bellainthemiddle Mon 01-Oct-18 23:11:22

I'm kind of 50% thinking I'll find it a good distraction and 50% thinking I'll find it overwhelming, but I need a good excuse not to go in and I can't face telling work about it (or coming up with some alternative). I'm definitely not emotionally distraught (I hadn't really registered the pregnancy properly, if that makes any sense at all) but I do feel a bit unsettled and randomly weepy. Probably the hormones being a bit all over the place like you say, @HumpHumpWhale! Ibuprofen has also worked best for me (I always take it for the first day of my period anyway), but I'll try the hot water bottle too - thanks for the idea!

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NC4Now Mon 01-Oct-18 23:45:24

See how you feel in the morning. The weepiness will come and go a bit, I’d imagine. On top of hormones and generally feeling unwell, it sounds like you lost a night’s sleep.
What have you told work? Could you invent a dodgy tummy, or is it too late?

bellainthemiddle Tue 02-Oct-18 00:02:53

I just said I had bad stomach pain and I'd been up in the night (which was not a word of a lie). But like an idiot I was all 'Oh yes, I expect so' when they asked if I thought I'd be feeling better later!

I did sort of doze a bit this afternoon, but now I have that 'too tired to sleep' feeling. I do kind of feel like it would be better to go in tomorrow, just to return to some kind of normality! But I hope the random weepiness is going to subside, since my work is full of men, and my manager people who are afraid of crying women!

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