I've posted on here a lot over the last two months, apologies.
Today I'm having a bad day. It's been nine weeks since my MC. On the whole, I think I've been doing quite well. I still think about it every day but I'm past crying and life is (almost) back to normal.
I snapped at my dh earlier and we've fallen out. We were supposed to be going for a family dinner for my SIL birthday and I haven't gone. He went without me and all I've done is cry and feel sorry for myself.
Physically I'm not ok, so that's having a huge impact of my emotions which makes me angry because I feel like no one understands.
This sounds terrible so please don't be offended. I feel so jealous of those on here who have managed to get pregnant again after their MC. I see other users congratulating them but selfishly I just wish it was me.
I don't really know why I'm writing this. Just feel really upset and alone tonight x
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Having a bad day
ForeverHopeful21 · 12/05/2017 22:43
I can completely empathise Forever, you're not alone. 
It's been 7 weeks since my MMC was discovered and in that time I've needed two ERPCs. Like you, I'm still not physically 100%- I'm exhausted and still bleeding.
I can empathise with the anger and loneliness too. I feel deeply hurt by my best friend who doesn't understand and whose callous reaction has shocked me.
At work, only a few people know about my mc and I feel like I'm living a lie. I think that the rest of the workforce are speculating about me being pregnant because of all time I've had off for follow-up scans and repeat surgery. I wish they knew the truth but I can't bring myself to tell them. I work with children and they're the only thing that's keeping me going at the moment.
I've become very antisocial and just want to hide myself away.
Tomorrow is another day Forever. Be kind to yourself, even if others aren't, and don't lose hope. X
Thank you so much for your responses. It means a lot to know that there are others who understand.
I feel a lot better this morning (you were right, tomorrow is another day). I haven't felt low like that in weeks but I think the argument with my dh brought all the emotions flooding back.
I've been on the conception forum over the last few weeks as we've decided to start trying again (even though I've been told not to as I'll be having surgery soon) but I actually don't feel like I belong on those threads; seeing the positive results made me sad for myself and I'm not sure that it's helping. AF arrived yesterday and I thought I was ok about it because we shouldn't be trying anyway, but it's still upsetting that my body doesn't seem to want / know how to make a baby.
I hope you're all managing well. Thank you for sharing your stories and the kindness, it really does help.
Got to get ready for work now. I'm a pregnancy massage therapist 
and have my first client in an hour. Oh joy! Have a good day ladies x
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