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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Advice first miscarriage

39 replies

Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 17:12

I honestly don't know what to write!

I have wave like mild contractions. I don't get period pain so can't compare. I didn't get far in labour before a c section but what I did have wasn't too painful. More like waves of intense pressure. Some thick dark blood with clots but am passing in the loo (but that often happens with periods).

We don't talk about this kind of thing enough for me to know what on earth is going on!

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 19:06

Ah it's really painful now. Lots of blood. Do I stay at home or go to a and e?

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Misssmoo · 05/04/2017 19:10

If it's more then a pad an hour go and get seen..sending hugs it's just shit ..I was made to sit in a and e and it was really not nice in front of people can you not phone EPU xx

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 19:17

Oh yes i forgot I have open access to the ward at the epu. I've just had conflicting advice and not thinking right. And not sure what they'll do?

I'd say it's more than a pad an hour it's just I'm pushing it out on the loo.

I'm tempted to carry on in the comfort of my own home.

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ForeverHopeful21 · 05/04/2017 19:23

I know it's an awful thing to go through. If you're unsure you could always ring 111 (NHS Urgent Care Services).

How far along are you? The pain and the bleeding might come and go - sometimes gushing and then the odd clot, but don't feel like you have to stay at home if you're worried or you're in pain xxx

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Misssmoo · 05/04/2017 19:26

Yeah I think it sounds as if you should call for advice ....sounds alot but blood always looks alot more in my opinion. Best to be safe though x

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 19:37

If you are losing a lot of blood then you might need iv fluids. It sounds similar to my experience, where each "gush" filled a pad. It was a wave of pain then a push of blood, more similar to labour than a period. I was kept in overnight for fluids and obs. They thought I might need theatre but everything calmed down when (sorry but no good way to say this) the "sac" passed. This was quite traumatic but my symptoms improved almost immediately. If you are going in take stuff to stay just in case, and lots of music (it was a real bonus to be able to put earphones in!)

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 19:37

There is also a great self care thread on the pregnancy loss board.

Will be thinking of you tonight, is so hard xx

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 19:43

I think I just passed something larger.

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AppleMagic · 05/04/2017 19:45

Hopefully now the bleeding will ease up a bit Flowers

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 19:50

Thanks enyla (sp?) it's like that. Waves of pain then I go to the loo and push it out.

I'm drinking lots.

I was 8 weeks today; on Monday a scan at epu showed it hadn't grown since 5-6 weeks despite a heart beat. So I suppose it will be quite small but lots of blood.

I'm ok actually, that was more shocking and the thought of it not developing well was more distressing than this.

I'm just not sure of the best logistics!

I'm going to have to do a last bedtime story for ds or he might not stay in his bed all night.

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MadeForThis · 05/04/2017 20:01

A hot water bottle can help with the pain. Sorry for your loss x

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 20:11

Thanks. I've read a thread advising chocolate, hot water bottle, iPad and towels. I have those wet pad things. I'm ok.

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 20:14

logistics wise, think about who you might call for your ds if you need to go in, also hunt out some old leggings to travel in as tight clothes hold the pads in place better

If you are staying home, hot water bottle and then alternate paracetamol and ibuprofen if you are in pain. I did this for several days after my mc as I was very sore.

So sorry you are going through this xx

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NovaArt3mis · 05/04/2017 20:17

Sorry you're having to go through this. It's horrible.

If the pain is sore but not unbearable I'd say you'll manage the process at home but you can phone EPU or 111 if you're ever unsure about something.

A hot water bottle, lots of water and someone to cry on are my only tips.

I found the maternity pads from boots a lot better than normal ones although I did begrudge having to buy anything matenity related at the time.

Flowers for you.

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 20:20

Thanks en it's logistics I'm thinking of. My dh will have to stay with him as there's no-one we can really call on during the night. He's in nursery tomorrow.

I feel bad for dh as he's had a really special day at work, looks like his project will get a prestigious award. He's also useless with anything remotely medical. But excellent at sourcing chocolate.

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 20:24

Thanks nova. I think I prefer home though I hope I don't have a clingon visiting me in the night.

This thread is really helping.

I can't really explain why but I'm finding this a huge relief. I've felt something wasn't right since pretty much the start of the pregnancy. I've no idea why I felt that. Just a gut feeling. I had no real symptoms unlike with ds. And then to find out it wasn't growing on Monday was a shock.

I may feel different tomorrow I guess.

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 20:25

I had to go in alone at first and I don't recommend it. I was examined in a&e by a dr with little English and it was very distressing. I would call on any favour you can think of, any local mums you know?

But if you have to go alone we'll be here with you x

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 20:31

I'm sorry to hear that. I've an amazing mummy friend but she's single now, and thinking about another colleague, she's also a single mum. Best friend now an hours drive away and the other is in South America. Wracking brains!

I think I could go to the ward if it's really bad; I have 24 hour access, certainly 24 hour phone access. I think it's part of the maternity ward.

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 20:35

It wouldn't be so bad if you could go straight to the ward, a&e was horrible. Also I was in shock as i had no inkling anything was wrong. I couldn't have driven either.

Would any of your single Mum friends have granny's close by, so granny could go to them and they could come to you?

Or bring their dc over for impromptu sleep over?

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 20:47

Actually yes I've thought of options. Hopefully won't come to that.

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 20:50

If you feel better at home, and it doesn't get more than 1 pad an hour, stick with that xx

Sending you best wishes xx

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 21:56

I called for advice and they said come on.

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Enelya · 05/04/2017 22:20

Sorry to hear that, hope you get well looked after xx

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Ekphrasis · 05/04/2017 23:43

Thank you so much for being there. They are brilliant here. The ward was quiet and they checked to see if anything was stuck but I think the worst was around 6-8pm and it was easing as I went in. Still some pain but not bad.

I can't believe I didn't soak one pad. I just kept feeling like I needed the loo. So I don't think I really understood how bad it was till it was mostly over.

I'm mostly relieved but thankfully have a day to myself tomorrow should it hit me. I think though, the hardest day was Monday as the baby was so much smaller than it should have been; this has been a relief.

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NovaArt3mis · 06/04/2017 05:47

Glad the worst of it is over. I ended up in hospital because the sac was blocking the neck of the womb and I pretty much felt like death.

I felt exactly the same, finding out at my scan there wasn't a heartbeat hit me hard. The actual mc was four days later and I didn't feel weepy just wanted it to be over.

The next little while will be tough, but be kind to yourself and know that it does get easier as time goes by.

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