I have just had my third loss. No living dc. First pregnancy ended in an early but very traumatic mmc, second stillbirth, third second trimester mmc.
I had surgical management last tuesday. I feel like i am coping but one thing is really niggling me and making my emotions swing badly.
My dp didnt attend any appointments this pregnancy which we both agreed on and i still am happy we made the right decision however i am hurt that when i found out about this mmc (had to give him the news via text) he didnt drop everything and make his way to the hospital. I had to hang around a few hours whilst a plan of action was put into place.
Fortunately the surgical management was arranged for the next day. I had to get in early someone could sit with me an hour then i would be taken to sdu and returned to the ward and could be collected later. Dp didnt take any time off to take me so a family member had to. Up until this point i kind of understand there were some crossed wires and i didnt want to be there myself so him not trying didn't massively ring any alarm bells. He works in education so i appreciate it is probably difficult getting time off short notice. In the aftermath it has slightly upset me tho. Altho i had surgery first thing i wasnt discharged until after 6.00pm due to complications but luckily my family member had been able to stay and was a great support.
The thing that's niggling me - he hasn't mentioned to work anythinf about the pregnancy or miscarriage and it really hurts. I can't get my head round why. He classes some people there as friends, always texting, going to the pub, nights round his house but noone has any idea of what we've i it seems have been through. I just find it really odd and like he is putting someone elses feelings above mine. I have askes him and he says he doesn't want people feeling sorry for him. I wish i had that luxury! I cant even be bothered speaking to him today.
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Struggling emotionally
13 replies
Gingerbreadmam · 22/03/2017 07:28
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