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TTC after Miscarriage

(9 Posts)
Sunseeker17 Mon 13-Feb-17 08:51:54

Hello everyone

I had a miscarriage just over two weeks ago. Found out at 9wks 5days that I had a silent miscarriage - baby's heart stopped beating at around 8wks 5days. Quite devastating as we had a scan at 8wks 4 days and everything was perfect - hb of 160bpm and well positioned. So it came entirely out of the blue. I decided to naturally miscarry and started to bleed at what would have been 10weeks 4days. I bled for around 10 days and started testing for ovulation the very next day. We are eager to get pregnant asap and not wait a cycle but I've had no fertility surge on my ovulation sticks (using the Clearblue dual hormone tester) and I'm starting to feel like I might not ovulate this cycle (I suppose my body will know when it's ready but just quite frustrating).

I'm trying not to obsess about it but it's very hard. I feel like suddenly EVERYONE around me is pregnant. The pregnancy related things I used to think about in my down time at work and at home- all that excitement- it's all gone and it's left a big hole in my life. I know it sounds incredibly irrational but in my darkest moments I'm starting to feel like it will just never my destiny to be a mother.

Just looking for some positive stories. When did you find you ovulated after miscarriage? How long until your first period (if you decided to wait one cycle!) and how long until you got your next BFP!

Baby dust to all. You are all incredible 😊

BeccyButterfly Mon 13-Feb-17 09:32:38

Hi Sunseeker, sorry for everything youve been through. Have u had confirmation that the miscarriage is complete? I had to go back to the hospital every 2 weeks for a scan to make sure it had all gone. It took 3 months for mine to fully leave my body, only then did i start ovulating. I was also advised by the hospital to have 2 full cycles before attempting to get pregnant again - i'm not sure of the exact reasons for this! (i'm currently 9+1 and hoping this one is sticky!) x

Inneedofaholiday2017 Mon 13-Feb-17 09:41:28

I can give you a positive story - I had 3 miscarriages (one 7 weeks, 2 slightly earlier) when I was TTC my second child. Then got pregnant the cycle after my 3rd miscarriage and my little dd is sat here now.
Stay strong, keep trying. Look after yourself - eat well, exercise, lots of vitamins esp vit d and sleep.
I know so many couples that have struggled and every single one of them have managed a baby eventually - it's just taken some longer than others and there have been lots of procedures and ivf and some have used donor eggs but they've all got a baby.
If I was you I'd go to GP and lie and say you've had 3 miscarriages/been trying a year. they can then start the simple tests to see if there's anything that causef it or just bad Luck. I know that's not the 'right' thing to do but if you can avoid going through this again with a few simple blood tests I'd do it.

Inneedofaholiday2017 Mon 13-Feb-17 09:42:31

Oh and the reason they advise you to leave full cycles is mostly for dating reasons - you are apparently most fertile straight after a miscarriage. Baby dust to you.

Inneedofaholiday2017 Mon 13-Feb-17 09:44:21

Oh and I ovulated about a week after I would normally cycle after my miscarriages

Sunseeker17 Mon 13-Feb-17 10:16:30

BeccyButterfly- thank you so much for your lovely message. smile and FANTASTIC news on your pregnancy. So happy for you! The hospital said that if I stopped bleeding within two weeks of the miscarriage starting then I wouldn't have to go back. I was doing pregnancy tests every day when the bleeding started and finally got a -ve the day after the bleeding stopped, so I think my HCG levels are back to normal (which suggests it's all been passed) but they said to go back if I haven't hadn't my period in 6 weeks. So I'll def keep an eye on it.

Innedofaholiday2017- your advice is very much appreciated. I'll definitely watch the diet (I was quite sick a few months before we conceived and I can't help wondering if that played a part in the miscarriage). So great to know that there's hope and your story is very encouraging smile.

Thank you both. So happy to be receiving these stories. It's a great support!

SA277 Tue 04-Apr-17 22:10:39

Hi. I had a miscarriage at 7 weeks after 9 months of trying. My periods have returned back to normal & we are TTC again. Im completely devastated still and just feel like i cant move on which is probably making TTC even harder. Im miserable and just feel i have no one to talk to, just like no one really understands how I feel. Even more difficult thing is that 3 of my really good friends are all pregnant 😞

Sunseeker17 Wed 05-Apr-17 13:50:34

Hi SA277

I am so sorry for you loss. It is incredibly tough, I completely understand. In respect of other friends being pregnant, I really to take comfort in knowing their story isn't mine. They will have their own trials and tribulations even though it seems they have "everything" I want in respect being pregnant and carrying to term. My boss is pregnant now and had I not had a heart to heart with her, I would never have known that it took them over two years to conceive.

Are you tracking your ovulation? I would really recommend Clearblue dual hormone ovulation kit. It's expensive but it might help!

I would also recommend getting something to disctract you like a DIY project, a holiday etc. For me (somewhat sadly!) it was my ankle- I completely sprained it about 6 weeks ago and couldn't walk on it for a month. At the time I was massively depressed (woe is me!) but now that I'm slowly back on my feet, I take joy in just walking, starting to do a bit of swimming and really looking forward to my Easter holiday. 😊

SA277 Wed 05-Apr-17 18:01:00

Thank you. Yeah we are tracking it now. It just seems like such a hard slog coz we started trying last March which i know in comparison to some people is very early days. I think i should give that a try. We are going through a bit of a tough time in general with various things but i think thats made me worse. It happened in Jan & i just cant seem to get over it 😞 Its nice to hear from people in same situation. My husband has been fab but finds it difficult to talk about it & im not the sort of person to sit & tell people 'yeah im not coping'

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