My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Find support and share your experiences on our Miscarriage forum.

Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Should I complain?

10 replies

SammyL100 · 22/12/2016 16:33

I had a mmc last month. I first went to the doctor when I started bleeding. She was a bew dictor recently qualified. She did some tests and told me and DH to wait in the waiting room whilst she tried to get us an appointment with Early Pregnancy Unit.

She then came out and spoke to us IN the waiting room not in a private room, telling us what to do next. The waiting room is small and my neighbour was sitting to the left.

Today I bumped into my neighbour and he asked " Did you have the baby?". He obviously overheard the doctor speaking to us.

I am torn between complaining to the surgery as she should have spoken to me privately and not in the busy waiting room, and not saying anything as I did find her easy to talk to and she is going to write me a letter refering me to a private clinic. As a doctor I have found her quite helpful but she did mess up.

Any advice would be appreciated.

OP posts:
Report
SammyL100 · 22/12/2016 16:34
  • new doctor not bew dictor (fat fingers)
OP posts:
Report
Heirhelp · 22/12/2016 16:36

Yes I would. It is obviously bothering you and you want it to happen to someone else. You need to ring and speak to the practice manager.

Report
helensburgh · 22/12/2016 16:38

I wouldn't complain but I'd write saying you want to point it out. Sounds like she was probably so anxious she was doing the right thing fir you ie getting appt etc..

Report
DixieWishbone · 22/12/2016 16:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BeamReach · 22/12/2016 17:18

Drs need feedback and are expected to reflect on things that go wrong.

I think as long as you let her know it is not an "angry" complaint (and perhaps feed back some of the positives?) she will be grateful to be made aware.

I am a dr and I would really want to know if I had messed up like this so a) I could give you a heartfelt apology (I would be mortified for a while but understand you're need to be heard) and b) I could reflect on what I did wrong, why and ensure it never happened again

I am so sorry you had to go through this. If it helps it (I am guessing it does not) it sounds as if the neighbour did not understand what he was hearing. And now he does will understand he should not have commented and will keep it to himself.

Report
BeamReach · 22/12/2016 17:20

"Your need"

Report
SammyL100 · 22/12/2016 17:50

Thank you for your messages and advice.

I spoke to DH. He seems to think there is no point complaining as it would sour the relationship with the doctor. He also seemed to think it was the neighbour at fault for ear wigging and then commenting to me!

I am due a call with the doctor ( chasing up blood results) and will mention it to her then. I may also wait til after she refers me to my private hospital and then drop a note as feedback.

Thanks for all your insight.

OP posts:
Report
BeamReach · 22/12/2016 22:22

It won't sour relations at all. It sounds like you are taking a balanced approach, a bit hurt and appropriately upset but with some perspective ( yes if you write an angry letter and kick up a huge stink things might be a bit ackward, but they are professionals and you don't sound like you would behave that way)...

I don't want to sound like I am encouraging a complaint about a fellow professional, but I would genuinely want a chance to respond ( the dr and surgery also get judged by regulators about how responsive they are to complaints and how they are handled. So a reasonable person like you, drawing attention to what could be improved calmly and appropriately will let them show good practice)

You of course should so this for you. You have absolutely no obligation!

Report
BeamReach · 22/12/2016 22:23

Neighbour should look at their behaviour too!!

Report
SammyL100 · 23/12/2016 09:39

Thank you Beam, your response has made me think.

I have now got the email of the Practice Manager and will put something in writing. I will emphasise the positives too of the doctor but highlight this incident.

I am awaiting a call from the doctor in question regarding blood test results but have decided to put something in writing rather than speak to the doctor in question directly as I feel I can write it more clearly than speak on the phone.

Thanks everyone!

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.