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First miscarriage and I'm not sure what to do

(10 Posts)
Jojotodd Sun 18-Dec-16 16:13:16

Hi all,
I started to miscarry last Thursday (baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) and have been bleeding on and off since then with some clots and cramps. Had another scan which showed that baby and sac still there. So after 9 days of bleeding I'm still stuck in limbo. I've been offered an erpc under general but I'm not sure I want to have an op but then on the other hand I hate waiting for it all to happen. Did any of you wait to miscarry naturally and how long did it take? Or if anyone had the erpc under general was it ok? Thanks for any advice xx

Hoppinggreen Sun 18-Dec-16 16:18:30

I'm sorry for your loss.
I couldn't cope with waiting so I opted for Erpc under general.
I had to have it done Privately as the hospital were being rubbish and the private clinic booked me in within hours of us getting the sad news. Obviously being Private my care was excellent and I stayed overnight but I have friends who have had similar ops and they were Day cases. Sadly they didn't get the standard of care I did and one friend had to wait for several hours in a room with ladies waiting for terminations which was pretty traumatic for her.
Sending you knd thoughts x

Jojotodd Sun 18-Dec-16 17:10:25

Thanks hoppinggreen- I really appreciate your advice - yes am worried I'll have to wait until after xmas if I go NHS. I'll look into the private option and see. Thanks again x

Bumblebee25 Sun 18-Dec-16 18:19:14

Hi Jojotodd,
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Having just gone through a missed miscarriage myself I thought I share my experience. I had a minor bleed when I was meant to be 11+2 and rushed to A &E who got me a scan for the next day, which showed baby had not grown past 5 weeks, which was devastating news. I had to wait for another week for a second scan which confirmed no change after which I was given 3 choices: let it happen naturally or have it managed medically or surgically. I chose Erpc as I wanted it to be over as quickly as possible and got an appointment for 3 days later (a week and a half since I had my first scan). They said nature may start taking its course before and I started to have some pains and minor bleeding the day after the second scan. The day before the op was very painful but not much bleeding. The op itself went well and was done as day op and everyone was so sweet and caring at the hospital. I've never had an op of any kind let alone ga however I shouldn't have worried, I felt I was looked after very well. I had a private room and was kept up to date what was going to happen. This was at NHS hospital in North of England. Having had those pains earlier, I'm not sure if I had coped with natural miscarriage so erpc was definitely the right choice for me. I hope you get your appointment soon & sending kind thoughts to your way, the waiting I found was the worst. X

Jojotodd Sun 18-Dec-16 20:01:04

Hi Bumblebee - thanks for your reply and sorry for your loss too - I was 11 wks and 3 days so very similar story sad
I think I will go for the erpc and hope I get an appt before xmas. It's so hard to know what to do as I really didn't want the op but the waiting is worse than I thought it would be!
Fingers crossed - thanks again for your kind words - hope you have a lovely Christmas xx

Wibblewobble100 Mon 19-Dec-16 19:44:00

Sorry this is happening to you. I went through this at the start of Dec too. Bleeding at 11+5. Scan showed baby 8+ 3 no heart beat. My erpc was booked for 5 days later. During this time the pregnancy sac detached from the top of my uterus and I had lots of pain and lots but no sac passed so I did go on to have the erpc as I felt I didn't want the uncertainty of what would happen when any longer. I was terrified of theGA but it was absolutely fine. In fact all my care has been superb.

moonoverthewater Mon 19-Dec-16 19:59:18

I'm sorry for your loss.
I had the operation as couldn't stand the waiting.
I had a scan at 11 and a half weeks following some spotting and the baby had stopped growing at 6 weeks. I had the op at 13 and a half weeks under general anaesthetic.
I was terrified about being put under but it was actually okay and I was well looked after (NHS). My husband could stay on the ward all day with me and the staff were very caring and sensitive about why I was there.
I found the recovery after the op to be okay too and better than people I know who waited to miscarry naturally.
Again I'm so sorry you are going through this x

Jojotodd Mon 19-Dec-16 20:17:24

Thanks Moon - sorry for your loss too - it is horrible waiting...it's been 11 days now since I started miscarrying and things have been very stop start. I've been at work as normal and I thought I could handle it but I think I'm going to call the hospital to book the op tomorrow. Thanks for your reassurance about it - that makes me feel less apprehensive xx

moonoverthewater Mon 19-Dec-16 21:40:36

I took a few week off work too, I couldn't face people and needed time to get my head round things.
I had never had GA before but it was fine, I was given pain killers afterwards and some to take home but I didn't need that many to be honest. I felt a bit weak for a few days and had some bleeding (not heavy) for about 2 weeks but the recovery was fine.
After the op I just had to stay on the ward until I could get out of bed unaided and pass urine so I was out about 3 hours after the op.
I hope you manage to get an appointment soon and any questions just ask xx

moonoverthewater Mon 19-Dec-16 21:41:11

P.s. In my wait for the op I was bleeding too and like you it was very stop start x

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