Can't cope with celebrity pregnancies

[Burgerandchips]

Hi all,

I have had 2 miscarriages this year. One was the worst ordereal of my life and I almost died.

I was getting on ok only thinking about them on the odd occasion, but in the last month with celebrities plastered everywhere I have gotten really upset. It's like it's SO EASY to pop babies out. I also haven't managed to get pregnant since the second which was in June.

With friends atleast it's easier to control but with celebrities it's everywhere. Even looking for a song on YouTube there are so many bloggers with birth stories that pop up.

Any wise words???

[Caroian]

I understand how you feel. I'm blessed with a five year old, but we've been through huge amounts of fertility treatment and pregnancy loss and been unable to have another child. Whilst I'm deeply grateful for what we have, I still feel sad when I hear pregnancy announcements and see people growing their families with seeming ease.

The thing which has helped me most is trying to remember that you actually don't know everyone's story. Even celebrities keep things private. Whilst they (and the media) may make it look easier, it doesn't mean it has been. It is impossible to know what struggles someone has been through to get where they are, and we are just glimpsing part of the journey. After all, when I was pregnant with my son, I'm sure I was the one making others feel sad. When I see a pregnant woman I try to remember that it may have taken her 4 years to get there. When I see someone with three kids, I think that they may have experienced three times as many miscarriages as me in order to get there. I know the joy a successful pregnancy would bring to me right now, and it helps me to stop resenting others for sharing their joy.

I'm really sorry that you've had such a horrible time, and I hope your own happy ending is just around the corner.

[PenguinsandPebbles]

Deep breaths

counselling may help you, it has been the only thing that has got me through.

I was an utter mess before I started counselling, after number 4. I have now had a further three and up until a few months ago I could not even walk down the street because seeing a pregnant woman would have me in uncontrollable tears. I couldn't watch anything with a baby in it and I do find these things very hard still but I can cope.

I keep focusing on the fact this will happen for me at some point in the future, I have to believe that and by focusing on this I find I can cope better.

I haven't been pregnant for a few months either, I've found that hard but in a different way so I can relate to that feeling hoping this month will be the one that works out for us, I just keep trying to look forward.

I hope it soon works out for you x

[user1480238312]

I know exactly what you mean. I mescarried on Wednesday and now it feels as is everywhere people are happily pregnant and we are the only ones missing out. Like it's so easy for them, what did I possibly do to be in this position!? To rub salt in the wound, my OHs best friend and his fiancée have just announced their healthy pregnancy (they knew we were pregnant too. And that we lost the baby) and their due date is literally just days after ours would have been.

I dread leaving the house for seeing babies and pregnant ladies- I went to fill up my car yesterday and there was a lady with a tiny baby and I just stood and cried holding a petrol pump. People were looking at me like I was insane.

I really hope things get better for you, and that you don't feel like you are alone. Sadly, there are all too many ladies that have to go through this! The thing I'm trying to tell myself, is when I do get a baby, and I'm determined I will, I am going to hold them so tight and not ever take a single moment for granted 💖

Lots of love xx

[Cityzen74]

Yes I can relate to how you feel too and it's awful isn't it?

I am so sorry for your losses. Counselling could help - I have had a bit of counselling and found it very helpful although of course I am still sad about the babies I have lost.

Take care of yourself the best you can

[TurquoiseDress]

Hi OP
So sorry for your losses

I totally understand where you are coming from- not just "celebrities" but all those in the public eye.

Saw some "breaking news" earlier and it was about Zara Phillips being pregnant with her second baby...it jarred with me as my LO is just a few months younger than her toddler.

I had a MMC almost 6 months ago, have always fallen pregnant so easily before- been TTC since shortly after the miscarriage and nothing so far.

I think about things everyday & seeing other woman (in the public eye and my friends/acquaitances) kind of rams it home each time, reminding me that I'm not pregnant again yet.

I most definitely feel your pain.

[SammyL100]

I hear you all!

I had a mmc this week. On the news Cheryl Cole, Zara Tindall, even on Loose Women Linda Robson brings her baby grandchild on the show.

It's like the world is mocking me. I keep repeating to myself "85% chance of successful pregnancy next time round"....hold on to that.

[SammyL100]

I did read about the following ladies who'd had a miscarriage though:

Beyonce, Pink, Mariah Carey, Courtney Cox, Guiliana Rancic, Nicole Kidman, Nicola Sturgeon, Gwyneth Paltrow, Brooke Shields amongst others.

We hear the success stories but it is fair to say the pain of miscarriage has been felt by women from all walks of life.

[Burgerandchips]

Thanks for the messages, I feel sad others feel the same way I do. I have also been bombarded with 3 month scan pictures on my facebook. I may go to the GP to see what's available. Sometimes I am fine then sometimes I feel completely wrecked.

[Mrsharper2016]

I feel for you!

TBH celebrity pregnancies are not the worst for me. I just suddenly discovered that there are so many prams, buggies and bumps on the street and just couldn't hold my tears first several weeks yes literally several weeks after the miscarriage. And scans and baby photos on FB really got me as well. And worse comes to worst, when I just want some time alone, some close family even brought baby to me saying it can help me 'forget' my loss. So I totally understand your situation and feel for you!

I think counselling would work and hope we all get through this stage.