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I went to A&E at 5.30am this morning

(13 Posts)
BastardBernie Sun 23-Oct-16 22:34:32

I had a coil fitted a few days ago. It didn't feel right, not like the last time I had one fitted before I was pregnant with my youngest.
I drove there because I had been flooding for 48hrs; comepletly saturated and a few huge clots. Terrible stomach pains, they kept me sat up right from about 8pm, too painful to cry.
I got a good parking space and went in, explained my situation and took a seat. No pain relief for 4 hours, got through it by breathing techniques and watching the clock and the seconds tick by.
I got called into a scanning room at 10.40am and an old school gynae consultant internally scanned me. Phew, get this thing out of me and I'm out of here, I thought.
Bernie, I'm afraid you are miscarrying.
Adrenaline has kept me going, as have looking after my three wonderful children. But now it's hit me like a car crash and I go back to work tomorrow.
I have never experienced this and I don't know what to do. I'm told to go back on Friday, but how do I cope with this practically and emotionally?

BastardBernie Sun 23-Oct-16 22:39:19

This is awful.

RJnomore1 Sun 23-Oct-16 22:41:56

I have no idea and nothing to offer as advice but I am so sorry. I presume it was totally unexpected given the circumstances. Have they given you advice on the physical symptoms - the pain etc?

I do hope someone better than me comes along soon. I am not sure you should be going to work tomorrow though.

Ricksheadtilt Sun 23-Oct-16 22:41:59

I'm so sorry. I have no practical advice, but didn't want you to feel alone.
Massive hugs x

ReallyShouldKnowBetterAtMyAge Sun 23-Oct-16 22:44:03

Call in sick for work, massive shock and you need time to process it flowers

themindbogglesallthetime Sun 23-Oct-16 22:45:02

You have no practical advice but didn't want to read and run. I don't tryouts should go to work tomorrow under any circumstances. Please rest. Someone with more helpful advice will be along shortly flowers

themindbogglesallthetime Sun 23-Oct-16 22:45:36

Sorry I have no practical advice x

Northernlurker Sun 23-Oct-16 22:47:58

Well you're not going to work tomorrow for a start. You've had a lot of pain, blood loss and shock. Call in sick, keep warm and keep drinking fluids and taking pain killers.

BastardBernie Sun 23-Oct-16 22:52:34

I start a new job tomorrow after 12 months maternity leave. My heart is aching, I feel so weak. How could I have not known? Something that is mine has been taken away from me before I even knew about it. The stomach bug I thought I was experiencing wasn't one after all. How did this happen? Do I just keep replacing the ST and carry on as normal smiley me even though I know what is going on? When do these cramps ease? When will I not feel like this?

TwentyCups Sun 23-Oct-16 22:53:36

As PPs have said take a day or two off work. You will probably be bleeding for at least another day and your body needs rest for now. A hot water bottle should help with that, or a hot bath too.

Emotionally, remember you are allowed to grieve. I miscarried an unplanned baby, before the pregnancy was confirmed so I have been where you are today. Things that helped me were talking about it to friends IRL and also to a pregnancy loss helpline. I can't remember which organisation now, but talking to a stranger really helped me come to terms with my loss. I felt guilty for grieving for someone I didn't know I wanted to have, please remember you are entitled to process this grief whichever way helps.

flowersyou can get through this.

IssyStark Sun 23-Oct-16 22:57:00

Don't go to work tomorrow, use paracetamol/ibuprofen and hot water bottles if necessary, and keep your fluids up. Don't use tampons, just towels. If you are getting through loads very quickly, get help.

Other than that, sofa, blankets, telly and have a box of tissues on hand.

Some m/c feel like heavy periods, some like mini-labours. I've had several of both types but you just get through the physical stuff. Emotionally it's more difficult and it will take time, especially as you didn't know you were pregnant.

All the best flowers

tinkywinkyshandbag Sun 23-Oct-16 23:12:21

So sorry for your loss, what a shock. I know you must be reluctant when you are due to start a new job but is there any way you could call in sick? Is there maybe an hr manager you could speak to in confidence or could you confide in your boss? Or if all.else fails lie and say you have norovirus? You need time to process this, and rest. Hugs to you, so sorry.

BastardBernie Thu 27-Oct-16 16:22:24

I've been in everyday. I just can't do this at the moment but the hours, location and job are too good to give up.
I feel like a robot on auto pilot. I want to be at home with my babies sad

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