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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

2nd MMC

7 replies

pickledsausage · 04/05/2016 12:54

Hello everyone,

I'm just recovering from my ERPC yesterday and was doing ok but my boss just messaged saying 2 people on my team have announced their pregnancies this week. It's knocked me sideways. I found out at my 12 week scan on thurs that the baby had stopped growing around 8 weeks. So they must have just had their 12 week scans too. They're both lovely and I'm happy for them but my god it's going to be a struggle watching them grow like i should have been.

1st MMC was blighted ovum found at 8 weeks. I know I'm not the first or last woman to have any of this and actually it's not even that bad compared to some poor people but just argh. Feeling rather crappy and my usually v supportive and wonderful DH just said sorry but I don't get why you're so upset.

Sorry this all probably a bit incoherent. I just want to be pregnant again but am also now terrified of actually getting pregnant again.

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Levithecat · 04/05/2016 14:45

Hi pickled, ERPC yesterday here too... I hope you're recovering well. I think finding out about colleagues' pregnancies would knock me too, massively--you're happy for people but it stings to see them having what you expected/hoped for. And it's not something you can openly express! be gentle with yourself and accepting of all the feelings.

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pickledsausage · 04/05/2016 15:39

Oh Levi I'm so sorry you're going through this too. How are you feeling after yours? I've been feeling mostly fine, just tired, just woken up from a nap and feel like I could go back to sleep again!

Argh thanks for understanding, I'm going to have to find some serious strength from somewhere tomorrow!

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Levithecat · 04/05/2016 16:17

I'm doing ok...tired too, feeling a little teary. I'd started miscarrying naturally a day or so before and found that tough so the erpc was a relief tbh.

Are you back at work tomorrow? Are you up for it so soon? I hope your boss and colleagues are supportive and understanding (if they know). It is a very tough thing X

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pickledsausage · 04/05/2016 16:24

Same here, started to bleed lightly Friday and it got gradually worse. By the time they put me under I was in a lot of pain, I don't think I was far off miscarrying completely. It was such a relief to wake up pain free, I've not taken any painkillers since either which I wasn't expecting.

My boss has been pretty understanding but also very keen for me to get back as its very busy. I will see how I get on and if I struggle will work from home on Friday I think. Colleagues on immediate team know I had an op and I think will have put 2 and 2 together given not drinking recently, no coffee etc. Xx

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Jsy123 · 04/05/2016 22:43

I'm so sorry for your losses. I can totally understand why you are upset. I've been in your shoes, I had two mmc in 2014 and in-between them my sister-in-law fell pregnant and I was in bits. Like you, I was happy for her and my brother but her pregnancy really reminded me of what I'd lost.

I don't have any words on how to make this better I'm afraid, just wanted to reach out and say that what you're feeling is totally normal.

As for your dh, maybe just ask him to accept that this makes you feel sad (even if he doesn't understand why) and ask for his love and support. Extra cuddles and love can go a long way to helping mend a broken heart.

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ButterflyGem · 06/05/2016 17:50

Hey I'm so so sorry for your losses. It's so hard isn't it. I had 12 week scan 18th April found no heartbeat baby had died just after 10 weeks 😥 Even though we saw heartbeat at an early 8 week scan just heartbreaking. Had all pregnancy symptoms too so never suspected a thing. Had to take pills & in hospital overnight. I've been off work sick & 1st day back is Monday. Kind of similar, my boss told me that another girl in the office has just announced her pregnancy too, not sure how I'm going to cope with that I don't think it's properly sank in yet, but trying to think as positive as possible this was our 1st pregnancy, I have arranged with my doctor to see a counsellor in the next few weeks. Sending lots of hugs 😘 xxx

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rider1975 · 06/05/2016 21:49

Hello ladies - I'm so sorry for your losses. I'm having my second missed miscarriage - had the scan yesterday. I'm having medical management this time and I'm pretty apprehensive. I don't feel much at the moment - just numb I guess. I'm ready for some lows and tears next few days. It's a sad time.

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