Oh Izzy my lovely what a heartbreaking thing to happen, I am so very very sorry.
I lost my DD1 at 20 weeks, no heartbeat found at 20 week scan, we later found out she'd died due to toxoplasmosis infection and I was induced and delivered her.
I have just lost my third baby, I had a TFMR at 13+ weeks due to a lethal diagnosis of acrania/anencephaly which is incompatible with life, and also had a medical management delivery, so I've sort of come at this from both angles.
I'm happy to answer any questions you have about any of the process, feel free to PM if you don't want to post on the public forum.
Don't worry about getting back to normal life for now, just take each day, each hour as it comes. Like kitty my labour at 20 weeks was surprisingly intense and I had the intramuscular morphine shot too.
For now I would recommend giving some thought to the delivery and immediately afterwards - consider if you would like to see your baby, or take photos (charge cameras etc). My hospital had memory boxes that they gave out which was wonderful as these had little blankets, teddies etc so we had something to wrap our baby in (she was too little for clothes, her growth had been affected by the infection) and a teddy to send with her to the mortuary and a duplicate one to take home for us. The hospital will likely offer to do hand and foot prints and often photos for you which you can obviously take and look at straight away, later or never, as feels right to you.
There will be a chaplain attached to the hospital and you can opt to have them visit to bless the baby which can be a nice way to recognise your little person. You can also arrange to have any other friend/family member/faith representative come in to meet or pray for your baby if that would comfort you.
Medically, I expect you've had the oral tablet to prepare the cervix etc? The next step in both of my losses was 48 hours later, and pessaries inserted (you can do this yourself or they can do it for you) to start your labour. My 20 week missed miscarriage, the labour began quite soon after, I had about 1.5 hours of gentle period pain and then the contractions ramped up very strongly pretty fast. They lasted an hour or two and then I had a sudden whoosh of waters but they were mixed with blood - it looked worse than it was. Then the pain stopped totally, 20 mins passed and I just pretty much felt DD1 fall out, there was no pushing involved, just a little nudge. After a few minutes they gave a syntometrine injection in my bum to make the placenta come away, and after about 5 mins another little push and that came out.
With these early deliveries there is a risk that the placenta does not come away, or only partially. If this happens you will need help, sometimes a D&C I believe. This didn't happen to me so I can't explain much about it, but I was glad I was aware it was a possibility.
With my 13 week TFMR I had the pessaries and then had to have oral doses of the same medication every 3 hours until I delivered the baby. For whatever reason, it took a long time to get started - I had pessaries at about 11.30am, but didn't progress beyond periody pain until about 7pm which was very frustrating. But then it got stronger, a hot water bottle and firm back rubbing by DH really helped and after about 20/30 mins I felt a weird twang inside and the pain vanished. Baby slid out about 10 mins later. Placenta followed again after syntometrine, mercifully intact.
After the 20 week delivery my milk came in about 3 days later, and this became physically very uncomfortable (engorgement). There is medication you can request to suppress milk if you would prefer to avoid this. Ask them in hospital.
I would also recommend asking the doctor in hospital to do you a sick note for at least 2 weeks if you are working. You'll be able to then see your GP about extensions to that and fit notes to do a phased return etc in due course if you want to do that. I personally had 6 weeks signed off sick and then a phased return. It wasn't long enough for me, I was mentally very fragile, but felt worried about the sick leave so tried to go back. Don't rush it. Your healing and mental health is more important, take your time.
I wish so much you weren;t in this nightmare. It was the very darkest time of my life and has affected me profoundly and permanently. You may well be in a very deep state of shock right now, especially with all the physical side of it before you. Grab any support you can, and don't be afraid to get in touch with your hospital's bereavement midwife in the days and weeks and months to come. They are there for the long haul. I'll be thinking of you and your little one. I hope physically it is straightforward. I'm so sorry you find yourself here xx