How to deal with the waiting and not knowing?

[NoRoomForALittleOne]

I've posted on the pregnancy board but I wonder if here is a better place? I'm currently 15+2 weeks pg. I had a bleed at 9+2 and was diagnosed with a subchorionic haematoma. When I had my dating scan at 13+1, I was told that the haematoma was particularly large. Then I bled again at 15+0.

I was refused a scan as they picked up the heartbeat with a Doppler but I've been told that I have a high chance of a late loss, pre- term delivery and placental abruption.

I know many women have an SCH in the first trimester and it's all fine but I'm told that the size of mine and repeated bleeding in second trimester are associated with a worse prognosis.

I don't know what to do with myself. I'm continuing to have pain although no more outward bleeding. I'm told the pain could well indicate that I'm bleeding more internally and that is irritating the uterus causing cramping (yet they won't scan me to find out for sure how bad things do/don't look.

They haven't told me what to do if I do miscarry. I know that I could bleed heavily but again I've been given no advice about what to do. It's all just a big grey unknown that I'm stuck inside

[Flower29]

Hi, so sorry you're going through this. Your hospital sounds terrible, can't believe they haven't given you another scan. Have you spoke to your GP? I wonder if they could refer you for one...? I really hope this turns out ok for you and your baby. I'll be thinking of you. X

[NoRoomForALittleOne]

The hospital is in special measures with the CQC in large part because of it's obstetric care. I'm not surprised. They couldn't even safely prescribe drugs for me as an in-patient being treated for hyperemesis so I don't have high hopes for the care getting any better...

[Erica21]

Hi NoRoom
I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position, I also had a large haematoma found at 8 weeks but sadly after 2 scans with a HB, we didn't have one at 9 weeks. I am just recovering from an erpc. I can't really believe that your hospital won't offer you a scan, my local EPU at Maidstone hospital (run by nurses and midwives) couldn't have been more supportive. (The Emergency Gynae unit based at Tunbridge Wells hospital wasn't quite so helpful but always frustrating to have the care split between 2 hospitals.) apart from paying for a private scan I can't think what else you could do other than find another hospital near by who could offer you the reassurance you need. I bled so much in between scans I didn't know if I was coming or going. It sounds like the hospital are almost being negligent as they aren't offering you the basic care you need. I'd ring and make a fuss, call the drs etc. sorry I can't do more but hoping you get some answers. What does your midwife say? X

[Selinasupreme]

I am really sorry you are going throught this. is a private scan an option? Or do you have the option to be cared for by another hospital further away? X

[Selinasupreme]

And yes the community midwives are usually good at wrangling you a scan if needed, I think what they say holds a bit more weight and they can request them for you.

[NoRoomForALittleOne]

When I've looked at private scans around where we live (well, an hour's drive away because that's the closest), they don't offer a consultant scan which I would need because of having complications. I could go down to Manchester I suppose which is 1.5+ hours away. The next nearest hospital is an hour away and part of the same trust with the same policies and problems. I need to stay with the closest hospital in case I get to a viable stage as my last labour was only 25 mins.

I'm tempted to go to Manchester 'shopping' then present in A&E when the pain is next bad. It seems ridiculous to try and get a scan this way though.

I'm thinking about complaining about my care generally to force their hand.

I was up for an hour in the night because the pain was so bad. I didn't bother calling the hospital because I know that they wouldn't do anything. It's such a lonely feeling when I get pain and wonder 'is this it?'

[Selinasupreme]

I would suggest complaining, if you feel there are ways of getting better care for you and your unborn child however unorthodox they are worth trying for your peace of mind.

[Purplebumbo]

Can you somehow afford a private scan?
Just to say that abdominal spin canals be due to your growing baby and uterus, I remember I had some pain in my second trimester with dc2.

Wishing you a healthy and safe pregnancy

[Purplebumbo]

*abdominal spin canals - abdominal pain can also be due to

[Purplebumbo]

Just read your post about lack of consultant at private scan.

"I could go down to Manchester I suppose which is 1.5+ hours away."
Yy I would do this!!

[Erica21]

NoRoom
I would do exactly as you said, be 'shopping' then present at A&E, it is not acceptable to be in your situation without knowing what is going on without a scan. I am so sorry you are going through this, but do make as much fuss as you can xx

[NoRoomForALittleOne]

I've found a proper private EPU in Manchester with a whole team of varying consultants, midwives, sonographers etc. They're actually a private gynae service so offer antenatal screening of various sorts. They are ££££ but I am toying with the idea of going anyway. Another option could be a walk-in EPU in Manchester but it seems that they probably wouldn't scan on the day if they can find a heartbeat.

And to Purplebumbo thanks for trying to reassure about the pain and you are right it could be something else but given that it was preceded by an episode of bleeding and is very period pain like, it would be a classic sign of further bleeding in to the haematoma. They explained that at the hospital which makes me more that they did not scan.

I'm having quite a bad day with nausea today (would be actual sickness without the drugs I'm on) so in a strange way that is slightly reassuring. I'd be happier if I could feel movement but I can't yet. I'm just praying that this little one hangs on in there for a good while yet. I'm really trying to be positive...