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Feeling sad

(6 Posts)
SaltySeaBird Tue 26-Aug-14 21:51:12

I had my second miscarriage at the end of June at 8 weeks and I'm just feeling so sad all the time at the moment.

I've found out a close friend is pregnant, due a day after my due date. Another good friend is due two weeks later.

I'm just finding it really hard to handle. I do feel grateful that I have one DC but we really wanted two with a small age gap which isn't going to happen now.

I just feel so lost and sad right now.

LinaDee Tue 26-Aug-14 21:59:02

Hi salty,

I'm sorry you are feeling so down. I am in a similar position. 1 DD and I miscarried in June. I have lots of people round about me expecting babies around the time I would have been due and it's a constant reminder that is almost impossible to bear on some days.

The best thing I've found is to speak about it with family and friends - anyone who is willing to listen and ideally not someone who is going to be telling you how you should be feeling or handling this.
I have to remind myself constantly that everything I'm feeling is normal under the circumstances and let myself feel it.

I'm sorry you won't have the small age gap between your DC that you wanted but try to think about the benefits of having a bigger age gap. For instance, they will be into different things at different times so you'll have opportunities to take them to things individually and potentially have more one on one time with each if them as well as family all together times. (Just a theory/thought)

Remember you are grieving. It takes time. Look after yourself

Raconteurs Tue 26-Aug-14 22:12:35

I am so sorry, I know exactly what you are going through. I had two miscarriages too between kids and the small gap is a big one. I still feel sad about my losses. I had friends have babies around both the mc due dates. I found it terribly sad and distanced myself from them. I also found myself disappointed by people I thought were good friends. We did eventually had dc2 but it was a terrible time and I was so stressed when pregnant. I wanted 3 but there is no way I am going to chance having another mc. I saw a woman's health counsellor she was amazing I would highly recommend you see your gp and ask to be referred. Take care of yourself x

SaltySeaBird Tue 26-Aug-14 22:29:47

Thank you for your kind words. I can't help but feel so left out of all the pregnancies going on around me and just in despair that I'll never have the family I so longed for.

Erica21 Wed 27-Aug-14 23:50:09

Hi Salty,
I too have a DC, he is 26 months and I MC our second baby a month ago at 12 weeks. The age gap seemed perfect, I conceived quickly and was very happy. The MC has totally wiped me out emotionally. On Monday, DS was blue lighted to A&E for a rare blood sugar problem that we thought he'd grown out of. Whilst sitting with him attached to a drip, a friend of mine who's DS shares the same birthday as my DS, texted to say that she was expecting baby no.2 at the end of Feb (we would have been beginning of Feb) - it's left me totally numb and in shock. Then, AF turned up whilst in the hospital whilst I was totally unprepared for that too! I feel side swiped by everything that's happened in the last month. I know I must be strong but just needed to vent this out. I guess with AF turning up I can ttc again but not sure I have the energy at the mo... I feel your sadness and can offer a shoulder to cry on and hope that you get AF back ASAP thanks xxx

callmeovercautious Sun 31-Aug-14 23:01:48

The sad feeling is awful isn't it? I just saw a picture on fb of a school friends bump and it made me cry. We lost in July. Our 2ND dc. DC 1 Is 8 and this was our first pg since. Long story but I thought we had finally got our blessing and it was snatched away. I am trying hard to be happy for friends with babies and bumps but I've been doing it for so long now I think I'm at the end of my teather. Sorry for everyone's losses x

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