Advanced search


(12 Posts)
Bristolian1 Wed 02-Apr-14 12:54:16


This is my first post on here, as I was waiting for the 12 week scan before going public.

Sadly, after some very light bleeding and mild abdominal pain, today I had a scan (I'm 10+1) and it looks like there's only a 6 week sized node and no heartbeat.

I've been scheduled for a repeated scan in a week, but it seems to me like it is pretty likely to be bad news.

I'm struggling to know how to cope with this news - should I resign myself to bad news, or not?

Today I'm a complete mess and have not gone into work, but am scheduled to work the weekend (which will be really difficult to cover if I can't do it) and I'm just not sure if I can manage it. I work in a small, close team in a job which involves a lot of dealing with the general public.

I feel like I'm in a horrible limbo and just waiting for the inevitable. Any tips on how to cope with this?

jbee1979 Wed 02-Apr-14 14:08:17

I saw my baby's heart beat at 5 weeks and again at 10+5. I had symptoms like yours and no heart beat at 12+4. Don't go to work, tell them now - give them a chance to get cover. I had a surgical evacuation at 13+1 but the doctor told me to stay in the house, look after myself and be prepared for heavy bleeding in the mean time. He said to have a plan for someone to take me to hospital if it got bad, or if I felt faint to call an ambulance. The gap in between finding out and the op was like waiting on a funeral. I cried and overanalysed everything. You don't want to have to go through the physical as well as the emotional in front of customers. Be kind to yourself. All this happened me at the start of March, I hardly remember last month at all! I'll keep everything crossed for you, maybe your dates are out? But don't go adding to the stress and emotions of right now by putting yourself in a vulnerable position xx thinking of you xx

bakingtins Wed 02-Apr-14 15:17:31

bristolian I'm so sorry you've been given bad news. If you are still in Brizzle I have pretty much walked in your shoes as I am a frequent flyer at Southmead EPU. It's NHS policy to rescan in a week irrespective of your dates if the embryo measures around the 6/7 week stage, because it's at this stage they first expect to see a heartbeat. Unless you could possibly be a month out then I'm afraid I would not hold out hope. If you are already bleeding a bit it's quite possible that you will miscarry naturally before the next scan, and you really don't want to be at work. Call in sick, then they have tomorrow to arrange cover. You may want to check out the "tips for coping" thread for more of an idea what to expect.
Here to handhold whenever necessary. flowers

marshmallowpies Wed 02-Apr-14 15:52:11

I'm in the same boat - 9 weeks pregnant, had some spotting so went to EPU on Monday and they found a heartbeat but the baby only measured 5-6 weeks so the doctor thought its development was slowing down and it was probably not going to survive.

Yesterday I got on with my day as normal, today my energy levels have plummeted and I can't stop coughing because of all this smog in the air. I feel exhausted, and sick of waiting to see what's going to happen. If it's going to end, then I'm fairly resigned to that, but I'm dreading the actual event as I've never had a MC before. Have been properly tearful for the first time today. No pain or cramps, just more spotting, but I can't believe how tired I feel.

Bristolian1 Wed 02-Apr-14 17:29:35

Thanks to all of you for your kind words and support. It means the world to know that I am not alone.

YouAreMyFavouriteWasteOfTime Wed 02-Apr-14 17:40:08

I am afraid I had a MC a few weeks ago. it was quite physically painful. initially I wanted to feel the pain so I knew what was going on but it was much better when I gave in and took painkillers. I hope you are ok.

marshmallowpies Wed 02-Apr-14 17:51:52

Take care of yourself Bristolian - I would definitely not work at the weekend if you feel you can't. I'm meant to work on Sunday but it's a voluntary role so if I don't show up it will be tricky. I do have some colleagues to cover so I may just go along for an hour or so, brief them on what needs doing then come home again. Luckily within walking distance of home.

Apart from that I can be at home with DD, if needs be. Have spent all week being thankful and blessed that I have her, whatever else happens. Take care of yourself xx

officelady Wed 02-Apr-14 21:41:23

So sorry to hear you are going through this, I had a very similar experience last month. Went for a private scan at what should have been 10+3 but there was only a 6 week baby in the sac. I was very certain of my dates so knew there was not going to be a happy outcome. If you are unsure of your dates there is still hope, but sadly it does sound like you will miscarry. Definitely read the thread as suggested above and stock up on plenty of sanitary towels and painkillers in case you need them.
I was booked in for a repeat scan 10 days later but miscarried naturally at 11+3 before the second scan. I actually carried on working throughout, only took 1 day off (the day after the initial scan) but wouldn't really recommend it, I did have some heavy bleeding and pain which was difficult to manage at work. My coping mechanism is keeping busy which is why I didn't take time off, but everyone is different and you need to put yourself first at a time like this.

Gizmo2206 Thu 03-Apr-14 02:30:49

I'm so sorry to hear this is happening to you, I recently experienced a similar (went to 12 week scan baby measured 6 weeks) and had to wait a week. I'm from Bristol too and was at St Micheals. I was resigned to bad news during my week wait as I would have had a positive test before conception (bear in mind a baby measuring '6 weeks' at a scan would have been conceived 4 weeks ago I think) but if it could be possibles hat your dates are wrong then I would hold out some hope I think, I kept taking the folic acid 'just in case' even though I was certain that I would get bad news. The EPU were lovely and I hope you are well looked after whatever your outcome.

Look after yourself this week.

marshmallowpies Thu 03-Apr-14 09:52:07

Gizmo I'm still taking the vitamins as I figure I have to try and protect my immune system somehow. Already feel shattered and run down as it is, and the MC hasn't even happened yet. Will keep taking folic acid afterwards to try and focus on a positive outcome, that we might give it another go soon.

Gizmo2206 Thu 03-Apr-14 14:33:15

That's what I have done and it helps to feel like Im being proactive.

Bristolian1 Thu 10-Apr-14 16:39:15

Hi all,

Just wanted to say a big thank you to all who posted on this thread, your stories really helped me through this difficult time.

Had medical management for my miscarriage yesterday, which went OK (largely because of reading the thread about practicalities of miscarriage - thanks baking)

I hope you are all OK

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now