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Not coping well

(4 Posts)
LisaW1979 Wed 05-Mar-14 17:14:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Acommonreader Wed 05-Mar-14 19:44:38

Hi there, so sorry to hear about your terrible loss. I can't imagine what it must be like. Just wanted to send some love. Hopefully someone will have some wiser words than I have. I hope you have someone in rl to help you through

bakingtins Wed 05-Mar-14 20:07:46

5 weeks is such a short time, Lisa. Initially you had so much to cope with just getting through the physical loss and the arrangements afterwards, I guess now you have a little more space the emotions start to surface. IME grief comes in waves, you feel a bit better for a while then something brings it all back. Over time the waves get less intense, but I think you should not have any expectation of when you'll be 'over it' but rather accept however you feel on a given day. Were you offered any counselling by the hospital or via SANDS? That might be worth pursuing.

MabelMay Fri 07-Mar-14 04:21:13

Lisa I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. I had two MCs last year so know exactly those feelings - and I think the worst is the part you're going through now. Once the initial shock is over, it's the lost hopes - because of course we all start planning things in our head and picturing the moment the baby arrives, and picturing how it will fit in with the family. It's so unfair. You just have to allow yourself to feel this sadness - it's all part of the process.
It doesn't feel like it, but you'll feel better with time. I've just found out I'm pregnant again - so I'm sure you'll get that happy result in the future.

In the meantime, please look after yourself and don't put pressure on yourself to feel better. Lots of sympathy to you. x

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