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i am 35 weeks, find the baby dead inside?

(56 Posts)
happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 22:56:46

i have 2 boys with c-section, i aaas pregnant with a girl this time, i was very exited, yesterday i did not feel nothing, no movement, i notice it in the night time, i waited until the morning, i called the hospital, they ask me to came, they cheek for the baby heart, not moving at all, they confirm the baby dead, very chocked, they give me tablet and i have to came back sunday 9am for trying for normal birth, anyone had any experience? is it more hard than giving birth to a life baby?

Mandy2003 Fri 21-Feb-14 23:03:14

So sorry, but I don't have any practical advice. Do you have partner/family near you?

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:05:54

I am so very sorry for your loss. Its no harder Physically but you'll need lots of emotional support.
I'll be thinking of you xxx

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:09:30

thank you, i have my husband, my family above, i do have a few friend, but i am more worried about my babies as they are very young, and hoping everything will be find with me just for them.

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:16:47

I am sure they'll be ok. Children are stronger than we give then credit for. They'll prob be the ones giving you the most comfort and support, their unconditional love is just what you need.
do you know what you'll name her? X

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:24:45

i was not thinking to name her, as she is dead before born.

HauntedNoddyCar Fri 21-Feb-14 23:27:35

For the birth they can give you far more pain relief because they don't have to worry about them affecting the baby sad

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:27:37

my son was choosing meriam, so i will name her meriam, but do i have to put meriam in any paper? i have no idea as i thing she is dead inside thats it, she will need nothing.

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:28:16

I'm a maternity nurse. I'm sorry but you'll have to name her and give her a funeral. I'm so sorry x

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:29:08

You'll need to for her birth and death certificates x

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:31:19

They can't give you too much more pain relief as there is a small chance they are wrong and the baby is alive. They have to Make allowance for human error x

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:31:29

ok, thank you for this advice, i will name her meriam. i had no idea

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:34:17

Its ok, no one expects this to happen and when it does there is no time to prepare for anything x

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:35:19

i am felling very weak now, as i cried a lot, and had a very hard day, my friend they telling me you have to be strong for sunday, but i can't feel it no energy on e at all.

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:40:09

You will be exhausted, and its hard and not fair, its the worst thing a woman can go through. But you have two other beautiful little darlings to keep going for.
Of you really can not do it (emotionally or physically) then they will give you a c section. You might have to ask a few times but its in your rights to demand one. You might find a full anaesthetic the best x

Blondieminx Fri 21-Feb-14 23:40:46

I am very sorry you are going through this sad

Do look at SANDS which is a charity which supports parents affected by stillbirth. There is a section on the practicalities, a telephone helpline and a section for dads too.

So sorry x

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:44:41

May I ask - are you religious? X

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:45:07

oh, no i really don't want to go to c-section, as i had too already, and incase i want to give an other birth in the future.

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:46:17

They will allow you 3 c sections, its ok to keep your options open x

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:46:42

yes SarahPatricia i am, why does it make any difference?

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:48:14

Can you speak to your religious leader?
I am Christian - is it ok of I pray for you and your family when I am in church tomorrow?

BigArea Fri 21-Feb-14 23:48:19

I'm so sorry OP x

happywithit Fri 21-Feb-14 23:50:39

thank you SarahPatricia, its very kind of you, much appreciated.

poppins30 Fri 21-Feb-14 23:52:50

I am so sorry happywithit. What a terribly sad thing to be experiencing.

I hope your partner will support you through this x

SarahPatricia Fri 21-Feb-14 23:54:27

The other thing I should warn you about - they won't have you near the other women who are in labour. Some hospitals put you in a side room, others will put you in another part of the hospital x

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