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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

Feeling low days after ERPC -hormonal?

3 replies

Cobblestones · 24/12/2013 16:57

I had a mmc. Found out at 10 week scan that baby stopped growing at 7. Had no signs of bleeding or pain and in fact had all the signs of pregnancy..
Had an ERPC few days after scan..this was 5 days ago. I thought I was dealing with everything quite well. I had cried a few times. Felt awful and sad. Then after ERPC I felt ok. Not too depressed. I just wanted to move on and get on with my life and hopefully start ttc soon..
But since yesterday I feel low and depressed. And I guess I'm forcing myself to feel okay but it's not working anymore. I'm sure others who've been through this have felt okay one minute and at their worst the next.
When can I expect to feel normal again?

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freelancegirl · 24/12/2013 17:03

Sorry for your loss. I've had 5 mcs and two erpcs, the most recent being a few weeks ago. Be kind to yourself, you are going to have ups and downs both emotionally as well physically: it's a shock in all ways not being pregnant any more when you were so recently. I find having nice things planned helps.

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bakingtins · 24/12/2013 19:50

Cobble I'm so sorry you lost your baby. I'm sure some of it is the hormone crash, but also a lot of people have a coping mode to get through the horrible physical bit and their emotions are a bit shut down. You need to allow yourself to grieve the loss of the pregnancy and of your hopes for the future. Don't try to suppress the emotions, they will be back to bite you on the bum at some point. It helps to look forward and to be positive about trying again, but if you are having a crap day and feeling sad that's ok too.
I've had 4MC. I'm not sure the pain does go away completely, you just learn to live with it, and certainly it gets a lot easier as time goes on. An analogy I liked is to start with it's a big millstone round your neck, but every time you can let go of some hurt/anger/sadness or make a positive step a little of it is worn away. Over time it becomes a pebble you can slip into your pocket, no longer weighing you down. From time to time you take it out and remember, but it doesn't affect you day to day any more.

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Cobblestones · 24/12/2013 20:08

Thanks to both of you for your post and your kind words.
Bakingtins - what you've written is so sad yet so beautiful. And I'm so sorry for what both of you have been through.

I will take heed and let the tears come if they do. I hope the New Year brings all of us much joy and happiness.

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