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How will i know it is starting?

(23 Posts)
Hiddenbiscuits Fri 11-Oct-13 18:42:32

Am 6 weeks pregnant, discovered today that it has not developed since last week and no yolk sac. Was having early scans because of a previous ectopic. HCG levels have dropped and have been advised that i will most likely miscarry within the next few days. Was too tearful to discuss the practicalities with the midwife earlier and can now only remember bits of what she said.

How will i know its starting, period pain? Does bleeding come first or is there some kind if discharge? Please help me prepare. This baby was so wanted, took 2 and a half years to get a BFP i cant believe this is happening

barkingtreefrog Fri 11-Oct-13 19:08:45

I am so sorry Hidden. I had a mc at 7+3 last month. I started with spotting and because it was a clomid pg (we'd been ttc almost 2 years) they sent me for an early scan and there was no heartbeat, it was measuring less than 6wks. I convinced myself it was just the dates that were wrong but I started bleeding that afternoon and the bleeding got heavier over the next 3 days and I had cramps which got worse. I knew by the time I had the second scan 6 days later there was no hope but a tiny bit of me still hoped they would turn the screen round and show me a heartbeat, it was devastating. The cramps stopped before the bleeding, which fortunately was never scarily heavy, just very unpleasant. From what I have read on here my experience was pretty typical.
A wheat bag and painkillers helped a lot.
These forums also helped keep me sane.
Stay strong, it will get easier. thanks

Hiddenbiscuits Fri 11-Oct-13 19:17:03

Thank you. Did you see anything resembling a baby in the blood? Please don't answer that if you don't want to, its just something I'm worried about hmm

LunaticFringe Fri 11-Oct-13 19:27:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hiddenbiscuits Fri 11-Oct-13 19:36:09

Thank you for replying. Did you have a scan after the bleeding stopped or do you just assume everything has come away as it should have?

Beamur Fri 11-Oct-13 19:36:20

So sorry this is happening. My experience was much the same as barkingtreefrog. It was like a heavy, very crampy period. I did pass some larger clots, which wasupsetting.
Be kind to yourself and take it easy. Take some pain relief.

buttonsforbreakfast Fri 11-Oct-13 19:46:17

I'm sorry you are going through this thanks
I lost mine at 9 weeks, and it started with spotting and mild cramps the night before. Cramping continued overnight, and there was heavier bleeding in the morning, much like a period. I went to the loo (sorry for tmi) a felt a distinct 'plop' and I brlieve now that was the main bulk of things, if that makes sense. I couldn't see anything though. I continued to have period type bleeding and more painful cramps for a day or two. To set your mind at rest, I certainly didn't see anything baby like (that was my fear too) just a little bit of clotting, which I think is thickened womb/uterus lining. Apologies if this is a bit graphic, but I wanted to reassure you from a physical point of view, you probably won't see more than you would from. heavy period. Bedrest, hot water bottle and painkillers will help. I hope you are not in too much pain x

LunaticFringe Fri 11-Oct-13 19:58:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hiddenbiscuits Fri 11-Oct-13 20:26:06

Thank you, it does help to know what to expect- helps me to feel the tiniest bit in control of this huge mess. Thanks ladies

barkingtreefrog Fri 11-Oct-13 21:00:57

My advice would be don't look. A friend told me that I was probably stressing myself out and crying over bits of uterus. Which was harsh but probably true. I had a second scan as the first didn't confirm I was going to mc, but I didn't have one after the bleeding stopped, I was just given a pg test and a date to do it. The epu were supposed to call on that date to check it was a bfn but they didn't. I'd already done one by then for my own piece of mind.

buttonsforbreakfast Fri 11-Oct-13 21:56:51

By the time I had a scan, there was nothing there, and the hormone levels showed that the miscarriage was complete. The only thing I wished someone had warned me was that any pregnancy symptoms (sore boobs, sickness etc) can take a while longer to disappear, which seems particularly cruel but it's just the hormone levels taking a while to go back to normal. I even rang up the miscarriage association (who were lovely) to ask if it was still possible to be pregnant as I couldn't understand why I still 'felt' pregnant, and they explained (gently) the info above.

Bakingtins Fri 11-Oct-13 22:25:57

I'm v sorry for your loss Biscuits.
A 5 week baby is 1-2mm long, a 6 week one is 5mm so you should not worry about passing anything that looks like a baby at that stage.
I don't think anyone has mentioned you need to use pads rather than tampons for the blood loss. Night time pads and big knickers....and paracetamol and ibuprofen.
You should be offered some follow up - either a scan to make sure the uterus is clear, or a pregnancy test which should be negative within a couple of weeks.
It's a horrible thing to go through, but there is lots of support here. flowers

eurochick Fri 11-Oct-13 22:35:19

I'm sorry you're going through this.

I had period-like pains to begin with. These ramped up on the day I passed the sac. My embryo had stopped growing at a similar stage to yours and I can assure you I didn't see anything that looked like a baby - it's just not possible that early on.

<TMI bit> After the day of worst pain, I passed something that looked like a squashed blueberry and was about the same size. That was probably it, as the sac was about 1cm on the scans. It wasn't pleasant but not stomach-churningly awful to see either.

My mc was an IVF pregnancy after more than 2 years of ttc, so I know how you feel. It's incredibly tough. Make sure you look after yourself. Eat well and I suggest you take spatone to compensate for the blood loss.

I took codeine for the first time ever to numb the pain. With that, it was bearable.

Every mc is different but in case it helps, here's how mine went:

2 days of medium period like bleeding and period pain. I could carry on with my office job (although mentally I wasn't really there).
1 day at home in bed whacked out on codeine.
Next morning passed the sac and the pain eased quite a bit. I went to work but probably shouldn't have.
3 days later I flew long haul for a work trip. I was a bit weak and tired but managed.
I bled for 2 weeks in total, but there was only one day when I was in too much physical pain to be up and about. I probably should have taken time off, but I had heard such horror stories about the bleeding and pain that I didn't realise until I had been through it that the worst day was as bad as it was going to get.

Hiddenbiscuits Sat 12-Oct-13 09:27:46

Well nothing overnight and no cramps or bleeding this morning, just a waiting game i suppose hmm

Bakingtins Sat 12-Oct-13 12:02:44

Biscuits you should have been given options for management of your miscarriage - natural, medical or surgical, more info from the Miscarriage Association here
"Wait and see" can be very hard emotionally. Your HCP probably has a preference for managing a miscarriage at the stage you are at, but the options should at least have been discussed with you. If you are struggling then do get back to them and ask to talk it through again, it is very hard to take in information at the time when it's such a shock.

Hiddenbiscuits Sat 12-Oct-13 17:37:24

Thank you i have an appt next week to discuss options if it hasn't happened naturally. Just cant believe it is really happening, keep thinking what i could have done differently but know its just one of those things. Its a lonely experience as hadn't told anyone i was pregnant yet, although glad i don't have to ring round and tell people the bad news. This really sucks!

Luisa72 Sat 12-Oct-13 19:50:13

So sorry to hear your news too. Hang in there. It is a massive shock and very very upsetting. There is nothing you or any of us who have experiennced miscarriages could have done. Apparently the statistics are real high for miscarriage. The early pregnancy unit should give you leaflets that you can read in the privacy of your home. Like you I couldnt take it all in when I saw my first scan but read stuff when I had a window of thinking more clearly. You will be ok. It takes time but you wiill be ok. I'm getting stronger day by day. Take care. Luisa

Zipadeedoodah Sat 12-Oct-13 19:58:07

Sorry to hear this, I've had three and honestly can say its underrated heartbreak.....started with lines of dark blood and cramping. Stupidly decided to go out when it started and then ended up with a lot more than I bargained for in Waterstones ....meaning I wished I'd stayed in. I would suggest, a hot water bottle, burden, some ready meals so you don't even have to think about that. Plenty of water, helped me....and someone to support and help, I found the grief overwhelming and really needed someone when the waves of grief came. Really feel for you, but you will get through it, my favourite expression is This too shall pass.... Remember that.

Zipadeedoodah Sat 12-Oct-13 19:59:03

Brufen not burden

StitchingMoss Sat 12-Oct-13 20:07:09

Hidden, I would definitely discuss options. My first two miscarriages were missed m/cs and I opted for surgical (D&C) with both, with my 3rd which happened last week I was admitted to hospital with suspect ectopic and then m/c while there. I found the bleeding very heavy and then had to have a D&C anyway because it wouldn't stop. I found that far more distressing than just opting for a D&C first off.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Miscarriage is devastating and sadly deeply misunderstood x

cathpip Sat 12-Oct-13 20:12:36

Mine started like a period on the sat evening with light spotting and the next day turned heavier with clots, period cramps increasing but ok. On the mon about 4ish the cramps got quite painful,and mini contraction like but ibuprofen and a hot water bottle helped immensely, the blood loss was heavy (sat on the loo with it running out) sorry for tmi! I passed the sack on the Tues morning and the bleeding got considerably lighter as did the pain, all over and bleeding stopped by the fri. Am very sorry you are going through this, it's such an emotional time both physically and mentally. Take care of yourself.

SprinkleTwinkleMagic Sun 13-Oct-13 02:25:25

So sorry you're going through this. There's lots of lovely woman on here willing to support you ect xx

I had a miscarrige in July, I was 5 1/2 weeks. I went to the toilet & when I wiped there was pink blood on the paper. I went to the hospital and had a scan whiched showed an empty womb. Had blood took and went home. The bleeding got heavier and I started to cramp slightly for a day. Next day I was in agony I had shotting pains and cramping on my right side, went back to hospital & had an internal which showed womb was closed so they took it as a good sign. Had more blood went home and got a phone all to say hcg had halved and I was miscarrying. I then had 5 days of horrible cramps and bleeding and exactly a week after the bleeding first started I passed a large tissue, which was what would of been a baby. It was about the size of an egg, n had a grey line running through it kind of like a vein it looked to me. I bled all in all for 25 days with no cramps after I passed the baby.

Im misscarrying now, I started bleeding on Thursday, Id had a slight niggle in my right side all week then on Thursday I felt some wet in my pants, I went to the toilet and there was a lot of dark red blood. Ive had barely any pain this time, less than period like pain. I keep expecting it to get worse and keep waiting for pain and clots but nothing yet. I told everyone I was pregnant I was so excited. Can't face telling people im miscarrying yet because a little part of be is hoping it could still be ok x

So sorry your going through this. Do you have people round you to support you? Xxx

Zipadeedoodah Sun 13-Oct-13 13:31:54

Sorry to hear this Sprinkle, really hope you are getting the rest you need too xx

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