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Scared Sex will hurt after MC

(6 Posts)
confettiwoman Mon 02-Sep-13 12:20:10

I MC naturally (@9 weeks) 2 weeks ago, and although the bleeding has almost stopped, i still get stomach 'twinges', however moreover i'm petrified that sex will hurt when we eventually get round to resuming our sex life again.
DH has been fantastic, but i don't think he fully 'gets' that even once the physical pain has gone, the emotional scars that are left will take a lot longer to get over.
I'm even scared to 'sort myself out' so to speak, i'm scared that an orgasm will start the horrendous stomach pains i had in the first week after MC.
We've decided to leave it a couple of months before having sex without contraception, as i was overdue for a smear test so would like to get that sorted to see if there were any underlying problems that could have resulted in the MC, but it still petrifies me with the thought of anyone being 'down there'. I couldn't even go through with the internal scan at the EPU.
Am i being hormonal? Is this normal? Sorry but we only found out we were pregnant 10 days before i miscarried so i feel like i'm an emtional rambling mess at the moment - we never even got to have a scan of the baby.

Ruggle Mon 02-Sep-13 13:10:55

So sorry for your loss!
I was in a similar situation. I miscarried naturally at 11 weeks, and just 4 days before my first scan. This was my first pregnancy, so emotionally devastating. The first two weeks were terrible, but now, 5 weeks later, I am feeling fine, and hoping to try again.
I have had 3 internal ultrasounds since and there was no physical pain. I have dtd once, three weeks after the mc, and there was no physical pain.
I hope you find this reassuring!


confettiwoman Mon 02-Sep-13 15:39:36

Thank you - you've put my mind at ease a bit. It was my first pregnancy too, we had conceived on our honeymoon and it was a bit of a surprise as we weren't expecting to be so lucky so quickly. I guess the old adage that time is a great healer is true. x

Tomkat79 Mon 02-Sep-13 15:40:48

Hi confetti sorry you find yourself here.

We attempted to DTD as soon as my bleeding stopped after an ERPC and MC at 8 weeks. Physically I was absolutely fine but an emotional wreck. The only part that hurt was my heart and I found the whole experience over whelming. DH was great and very patient.

I don't think you need to worry about an orgasm hurting anything. Our bodies are amazing at getting back to 'normal' quite quickly. I do think though that you need to try and relax as much as possible or you might not make it that far ;-)


confettiwoman Fri 06-Sep-13 14:42:42

Well, we did it. And it was wonderful and natural and didn't hurt! I got 'nudged' awake this morning (5am OMG) but with a bit of cuddling etc i was ready and took the plunge. Only really posting to close this thread so that if anyone in future has the same concerns, they know that with time it'll get better and you'll be ready.

katatonic Sun 08-Sep-13 21:51:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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