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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

7 weeks, bleeding, clots, no heartbeat, sac measuring 5.5

26 replies

HoleyGhost · 05/02/2013 13:20

I am sure of my dates based on lmp and bfp.

But the epu can't confirm miscarriage yet, I am to go back in a week. The midwife said that stranger things have happened but the pregnancy is unlikely to progress.

There is no real hope is there? I am wishfully thinking that maybe I've lost a twin or maybe the early faint bfps were wrong. I really, really want this to not be happening.

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nearlyreadytopop · 05/02/2013 13:46

Hi Holey
sorry you are going through this, the momentwaiting and wondering makes it even harder.

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HoleyGhost · 05/02/2013 14:47

Thank you. It seems ridiculous to wish that the scan had been conclusive one way or the other, since it could have confirmed my fears. But I am here obsessively googling and worrying and have another week of it to go.

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grotbagz · 05/02/2013 15:04

so sorry you are going through this.

i was recently in a similar situation but was given this advice half way through waiting in the midst of madly googling and it made sense and helped a lot:

try not to google as much as possible - although sometimes you may come across something helpful, there is just so much contradictory and terrifying information out there so the chances are all you're going to do is worry yourself more rather than find those concrete answers you're looking for, just try not to make it worse for yourself.

i really do hope that it all works out for you :)

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HoleyGhost · 05/02/2013 15:12

Thank you, I am too upset to work and too worried about a heavy bleed to go anywhere, which does not help!

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grotbagz · 05/02/2013 15:27

i know what you mean - i'm having a few days off at the moment too. have you tried getting into a new tv series? i find they have enough going on to distract me and the cliff hangers make me think about them so much it takes my mind off things, plus they are so long, much better than films in that respect!

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HoleyGhost · 05/02/2013 16:12

I am all over the place, will try decluttering to take my mind off

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CaliBee · 05/02/2013 18:23

*holeyghost" I really feel for you. I went through the exact same thing recently.
Sadly it didnt end well for me.
Be gentle on yourself. Stay home if thats how you feel. I did....infact I only went back to work yesterday.

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HoleyGhost · 07/02/2013 11:26

Thank you Calibee. I am mostly pretending it is not happening though I know it would be a miracle.

If it has to end now I just wish it would finish.

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Flipper924 · 07/02/2013 17:22

I'm so sorry you're going through this worry right now.

I agree with not googling, and remember that people come to boards like this for support when something goes wrong, so you don't find many happy endings. I've been going through something very similar, with similar dates and scan, and the nurse told me that although she couldn't tell me that I wouldn't miscarry, she thought I had a very good chance of a successful pregnancy as they allow two weeks either way.

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Flipper924 · 07/02/2013 17:23

Oh, and look after yourself. I wish you the best of luck.

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HoleyGhost · 07/02/2013 17:33

Thanks Flipper - best of luck to you too, when is your next scan?

In retrospect, I am surprised they did not check my hcg levels. Did they check yours?

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AmelieRose · 07/02/2013 17:41

Hi Holey. So sorry this is happening to you. I went through something similar recently - same news on Christmas Eve and had to wait til 3rd January to find out for sure. I miscarried.

A colleague of mine also went through something similar, and she is now 31 weeks, so there is hope.

I agree with everything everyone else said - step away from google, and watch a box set. I watched series 1-3 of Downton Abbey as I'd never seen them before and that helped take my mind off things.

Best of luck and look after yourself. Hope everything works out for you.

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fatasbutter · 07/02/2013 19:03

holey I'm sorry you are going through this too Sad
I'm waiting for a repeat scan on Monday too and it's so frustrating. My dates were out by 2 weeks compared with the scan so I'm not holding out any hope although I haven't had heavy bleeding I have had some period pain type cramps.
Fx for you for your next scan. There's nothing I can say to make it easier but try and look after yourself and (as others say) keep google to a minimum! I read so many stories of hope but they weren't quite the same as my situation so I felt hopeful initially then realised I'm in a slightly different situation... I really hope you turn out to be one of those stories though Smile

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HoleyGhost · 08/02/2013 11:32

Thank you. The bleeding continues so I am not holding out much hope (I think, but then I keep fantasising about a surprise heartbeat at the next scan).

I want to go for a run, drink wine and eat pate but I won't just in case the foetus is somehow still alive.

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CaliBee · 08/02/2013 16:15

What you said above.....I was exactly the same. I decided to be practical in the end and imagine the worst (to hopefully soften the blow) and hope for the best(anything good was a bonus). My thoughts are with you in limbo land. x

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HoleyGhost · 09/02/2013 17:38

Thanks again. I had a cup of strong coffee earlier.

I've been having more pain and more bleeding, the coffee was my way of admitting that the pregnancy is over. I don't hope for good news.

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CaliBee · 10/02/2013 08:29

Hope you are ok. Thinking of you. X

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grotbagz · 11/02/2013 20:14

Is your scan tomorrow holey? Hope everything's ok!

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HoleyGhost · 12/02/2013 16:29

Thanks for your support, scan was today but (luckily?) I passed the sac last night. Miscarriage confirmed, but no complications, and I am glad I don't need ERPC. I was told there is still a lot of bleeding inside and it will probably take a couple of weeks to settle down.
It was the best result we could have hoped for today.

I am not sure if we will try again. Don't know if I can face another pregnancy (was already high risk for reasons unrelated to this miscarriage).

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CaliBee · 12/02/2013 18:20

I'm sorry to hear it wasnt better news holey. Give yourself some time and take lots of good care of yourself x

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BlackholesAndRevelations · 12/02/2013 20:00

sorry to hear that holey. hope you take enough time to recover and don't expect too much of yourself x

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Flipper924 · 13/02/2013 08:23

So sorry to hear of your loss. Please look after yourselves, and know that others are thinking of you.

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HoleyGhost · 13/02/2013 08:51

Thank you all.

Yesterday I thought it was pretty much finished as the sac seemed to have gone but last night was rough, passing more tissue and blood than I would have thought possible. Utterly wiped out now. Physically and emotionally.

This is a strangely isolating experience. So many of my friends and family are pregnant or have newborns. I had not told them I was pregnant and won't now.

My manager, my GP, the EPU, and all of you have been very kind. It means a lot.

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BlackholesAndRevelations · 13/02/2013 09:04

You're not alone xxx

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arigold · 13/02/2013 15:54

sorry to hear that holey - theres a thread in conception with support for those ttc following a miscarriage that's really good for being supportive and knowing how you feel if you did want to try again.

glad everyones been kind to you, it can be very isolating but try to take solace in the fact you know you can conceive - It's probably good to take a break but try not to let it influence your future decisions too much.

i hope you're feeling a little better

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