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Miscarrying now, 10.5 weeks, help

(23 Posts)
bzzbee Thu 17-Jan-13 13:37:29

My partner is on his way home but I have 40 mins on my own before he gets here.
Found out at the scan yesterday and ERPC was booked for tomorrow. But cramps and massive heavy bleeding just started.
Advice needed please, I have taken painkillers and am sitting on the toilet. Do I stay at home? Do I cancel ERPC? Should I treat this like a bad period (apply heat, take painkillers etc) and is there anything else I need to do? Physically at least, heart is another matter (broken)

magichamster Thu 17-Jan-13 13:45:16

Sorry I don't have any experience of this but did not want to leave your post unanswered. can you call the hospital and see what they say?

And I'm so sorry you're going though this.

LPplusOne Thu 17-Jan-13 14:03:40

I'm so sorry you're going through this, Bzz. Glad your DP is on his way home. I opted for non-intervention with both of my miscarriages and one of the most helpful suggestions given to me by the MWs was to take plenty of pain relievers and to stay upright as much as possible. So it sounds like you're doing the best thin for the moment. When DP is home then call the EPU to discuss your plan re. ERPC.

Take care of yourselves and each other. Don't rush going back to work - take all the time you need to deal with the physical and emotional trauma.


LPplusOne Thu 17-Jan-13 14:04:30

*the best thing

nellyjelly Thu 17-Jan-13 14:10:05

Phone hospital for advice. I was in similiar situation once and even though was cramping and bleeding, it was taking a long time so still had d and c.

Sorry ou going through this. It's rubbish.

Imnotaslimjim Thu 17-Jan-13 14:10:23

So sorry you're going through this. It does sound like you're doing everything right though. Wait it out, and the bleeding should slow in a little while. Heat and pain relief would both be great for this

If you think you are bleeding excessively (more than would fill a pad in an hour) please do pop to the hospital to be checked. And give them a call soon to ask what to do re: erpc. It could be that you'll just have a scan in a few days and see if its still needed

gillian88 Thu 17-Jan-13 14:21:45

Big big hugs. I know this is so hard for you, been there myself and its heartbreaking. I had a miscarriage and let nature take its course without medical intervention. Best advice is keep using strong painkillers, get in your pjs, wear pads and lie on the sofa with a hot water bottle on your tummy. Cry if you want to, scream if you feel like it- but it WILL get easier. You will never forget, but it will be easier to deal with. Xxx

bzzbee Thu 17-Jan-13 15:34:05

Thanks all, painkillers (feminax) helped a bit and DP has bought hot water bottle and heat pack. Hospital nurse was great and said to call if anything gets unmanageable but otherwise it's better to stay home (thank goodness, would hate to be in hospital now).
ERPC is cancelled and I only have to go in if bleeding doesn't stop in 2 weeks.
I feel much calmer now, was a bit panicky/hyperventilating when I posted earlier.

CaliBee Thu 17-Jan-13 16:36:52

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I was diagnosed at a scan yesterday as well....erpc not until monday.
This thread looks like it offers lots of practical tips

gillian88 Thu 17-Jan-13 18:24:36

Are you coping with the pain ok with feminax? I used paramol, you can buy them over the counter in most chemists, they are very strong x

spiderlight Thu 17-Jan-13 20:07:25

Oh, bless you. You will probably need decent pain relief. My GP prescribed co-codamol and strong ibuprofen to be alternated two-hourly, and hot wheatbags really helped. Stay close to the loo but expect things to wax and wane: I had about four days of heavy period-like bleeding, then it slowed right down for a few days before a sudden massive bleed - and I do mean massive - on the seventh day when the sac passed. It caught me off-guard and I was away from home when it happened, so be prepared. Everyone is different though. I found that I was OK during the days but had a lot of pain in the evenings.

Thinking of you sad

bzzbee Fri 18-Jan-13 10:37:18

Thanks for posting the link to that thread on practicalities, it really is helpful. I'm ok, slept a bit overnight (cramps and bleeding seemed to miraculously stop overnight to allow me to rest, and have now started again).
It is not what I'd planned (ERPC was today) but it is strangely cathartic to be at home going through this naturally. I held our tiny baby in my hands, I was wailing, she was warm, but it has helped me say goodbye and know that the past 11 weeks were real. My poor DP came to me and gently helped me let her go. I know some people talked of burying but we have so many foxes here and I couldn't bear them digging up. Sorry if TMI...
Today I need to get stronger painkillers and more pads and chocolate smile

CaliBee Fri 18-Jan-13 10:46:45 take care of yourself. And take some time to recover x

bzzbee Fri 18-Jan-13 10:51:40

You too CaliBee, xx

bzzbee Fri 18-Jan-13 20:12:50

I was ambulanced to hospital today due to repeated blacking out/fainting(scary... have a few bruises on my head and face where I didn't get down from the toilet in time). They removed some "stuck" products and let me home again after lots of checks and monitoring. The hospital staff and paramedics were fantastic.

workingonitagain Fri 18-Jan-13 20:51:54

hi bzzbee sorry you had to go through this. Glad you were treated ok tho. Take care and hope you get better soon xx

Imnotaslimjim Sat 19-Jan-13 16:31:36

Sorry to hear you've had to go to hospital, hope you're feeling better soon

jemfish Tue 22-Jan-13 11:13:55

bzzbee, how are you getting on? I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you're feeling less bruised and more comfortable at home.

I'm 10 weeks 2 days and I've had bleeding since Christmas. I've had 4 scans (around 6 and 7 weeks) and all was fine, strong heartbeat, no sign of the cause of bleeding. Was told bleeding should stop, but nothing to be worried about. It got heavy again on Friday with small clots and lots of red blood last night and cramping. Called the doctor today - they said it sounds like I'm heading for a miscarriage. I go in for an appointment this afternoon but I'm not optimistic. Reading the thread that was posted above about coping with miscarriage has me a bit scared. I feel so sad for what all us women have been through.

It's reassuring to know I'm not alone though. Good luck! xox

bzzbee Tue 22-Jan-13 11:20:54

Jemfish, fingers crossed for you. Hopefully you are one of those who has some bleeding but has a healthy pregnancy nonetheless.

gillian88 Tue 22-Jan-13 18:24:30

Thinking of you jemfish, really hope all is ok! X

jemfish Tue 22-Jan-13 23:01:17

Thanks both. Appointment was inconclusive. Doctor wants me to wait a few days to see what happens before I have a scan. The sit and wait game is not a fun one. And because of the uncertainty I'm only able to take paracetamol (and chocolate) but neither have done much more than take the edge off. Sore and tired sad but the not knowing is worse. It helps knowing I'm not alone.
To add to the trauma DP found out today that his mum has breast cancer! Not a happy day in our house sad

bzzbee Wed 23-Jan-13 06:54:01

Jemfish, I'm so sorry you are going through all of this.
Hopefully you'll get good news very soon.
I found heat helped too, especially if you can't use painkillers much, so hot water bottles and those microwaveable heat cushions.
Plus lots of rubbish television (I downloaded series 1 of "Revenge"...blush). Basically do anything that helps time pass as quickly and painlessly as possible.

jemfish Thu 24-Jan-13 12:59:04

thanks bzzbee. No good news for me unfortunately sad
The pain was worse than I was expecting! I'm so glad I'd had a read on here and knew a bit of what to expect otherwise it would have been more frightening. Have not parted from my hot water bottle for 3 days!

3rd day at home feeling useless and miserable but I haven't had pain for about 15 hours and the bleeding has lessened (thank god). Went to the Doc this morning and managed a trip to the supermarket (stocking up on chocolate). The trashy TV and DP (and lots of tears of course) got me through the worst of it.

Not sure If I've passed the sack yet - couldn't tell, I was just sat on the toilet gushing (sorry TMI). I've read that for some people this happened a few days after the main bleed...I'm nervous about this - I dont want to get caught out on the weekend or at work next week.

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